Page 44 of One Last Time?
She shook her head. “Don’t. Why would you do that?”
“We have two weeks.” Of course, I’d told her everything, including our time frame.
“Why does it have to be two weeks? Why can’t it be more? You look like you want more.” She gave me a kind, understanding smile.
“I want more,” I replied. It was the first time I’d confessed that. “I want more, but I think it would be selfish of me. The whole thing has been selfish of me. Abby, he promised his father he wouldn’t sleep with his clients. Jesus, just that part alone should fend me off. I knew what I was getting into, that it couldn’t be more. It’s not like his father doesn’t know who I am. We haven’t even been on a real date yet.”
To my surprise, she chuckled. “Taylor, you think too much and worry too much. I personally wouldn’t give a rat’s ass about anyone if I were so lucky as to find a guy I could fall for.”
“Fall for? You think I’ve fallen for him?”
“I think, my dear sister, that it’s more of the past tense. You’ve fallen.”
Panic gripped me because I wasn’t sure if I should be doing anything of the sort so soon. It was too soon after Brody. And not because I loved Brody and was getting over the heartache he’d caused. It wasn’t that, and the fact that it wasn’t told me Brody was the absolute wrong guy for me. Dylan, on the other hand, was something else. Someone I’d never expected to find. He just happened, and I wasn’t sure I knew how to deal with that.
“I’m… scared. I can’t fall for him, Abby. It’s a bad idea.”
“It’s not. Trust me. Better to fall for someone and know it’s real than live like me… floating around the world not knowing what I’m doing.”
I looked her over. Something was wrong. I could tell.
“Are you okay, Abby?”
She gave me a little smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes.
“I’m okay. I’m just acting stupid.”
“Oh please, you are far from stupid. Did something happen?”
“Yes, two good somethings, but I’m acting stupid because the somethings gave me an eye opener,” she confessed.
Now I was totally curious to hear what on earth these somethings were. “What are the somethings?”
“Porsha and Bella both invited me to dinner. I thought it was going to be the usual catch-up.” She smiled again. Back in high school, she, Porsha, and Bella were the clique. They were her girlie friends, next in line to Gilly and us as her sisters. “They both had good news. The kind they wanted to share in person. Porsha and Jeff are engaged, and Bella and Kirk are expecting their first child.”
My lips parted in pure surprise because these ladies were the equivalent of the perpetual bachelors. They were perpetual spinsters who walked around like goddesses treating every guy they were with like they were lucky they’d been acknowledged.
Porsha was getting married, and Bella was pregnant. Wow. That really was some news.
“That cool. I’m happy for them. But what was the eye opener?” I was stuck on that part.
She raised her shoulders into a shrug and sighed. “Me. I was the eye opener. They’re moving on, and so fast, while I’m here, the same. I’m going to be thirty next year, and until tonight, it didn’t bother me that I have no plans to get married, no plans to have kids, and no plans to do any of the stuff people want to achieve before that time.”
“Abby, that means you’re content with who you are and what you have. Most women aren’t like that,” I pointed out.
“I know, but I joined them tonight. I joined big time when two of my best friends changed before my eyes. Taylor, you should have seen how happy they looked. They looked so happy, and it wasn’t down to the foolishness we’d previously thought was happiness. Bella was practically glowing with it. You think you have it all wrong because you’re a relationship girl, but you don’t. There comes a point in life when you stop living it up, and when you look around you, it’s like there’s nothing. You have nothing. Just moments of fun, and then it’s gone.”
I hung on to her words, listening eagerly because I’d never heard her speak like this before.
“Abby, everyone has different stages in their lives.”
“Yeah. Sure. I’m just at the stage where I’m either going to continue as I am, spending my weeks with these men who just want fun and sex, or I’m going to take stock of myself and look into what I want for the future. How nice it must be to fall for someone. I would love to feel that… It must be nice.” She reached out and lifted the ends of my hair, allowing them to curl around her thumb then loosen. “Taylor, go with how you feel. If you feel anything for Dylan, then don’t give it up for anything. You look happy. Happier than I’ve ever seen you.”
I pulled in a deep breath. She was right. I was happy, happier than I’d ever been. I just didn’t think the decision was as simple as that, or that it was all mine.
If it were, I’d want to keep seeing him. I absolutely would.
Someone cleared their throat loudly, and we turned to see Gilly coming through the door that led out to the terrace.
