Page 15 of Pregnancy Scandal
The door opened, and the photographer came in. “I’m ready for you, ladies.” She said, smiling at us.
“You guys get started,” Taylor said to Mia and Vanessa. “We’ll be out in five minutes.”
They nodded and left us. As soon as the door closed, Taylor moved over to me, looking like she’d just stepped out of the clouds and the lineup of angelic hosts. I was so proud of her, and it was wrong of me to feel so rotten on her wedding day.
She took both my hands into hers and smiled. “Abby, talk to me.”
I shook my head. “I’m okay. I just need to get through this weekend.”
“Why didn’t you tell me about this whole baby idea? And Gilly?” She bit the inside of her lip.
“It’s your wedding. Taylor, I’m so proud of you and proud of the amazing man you found. I’m so happy you found someone who is worthy of you, someone you love.”
“Thank you. That is all beautiful, but please talk to me. I’m here. What made you decide on having a baby?”
I thought about it and gazed at her. “It’s the end result. To me, it feels like having something in this world I can be proud of. I haven’t done anything that I can say is me. I’m not business minded like you. I never have been, and I don’t want to be alone.”
“You’re not alone though, Abby.”
“You know what I mean. A man can leave you. He doesn’t have to stay. But your child is yours forever, no matter what happens. It’s blood. It’s your child.”
She nodded, and she seemed to be the only person who looked at me since I came up with this idea like she understood.
“I get it, Abby, I really do. That’s the way I think about having a child too, except that I hope my man will stay.” She chuckled.
“Oh God, of course he will. I’m sorry. That was so not the right thing to say on today of all the days.”
She laughed. “I know what you meant, Abby. Talk to me about Gilly… So, he said no. Did he say why?”
“It’s a crazy stupid idea. I shouldn’t have asked him. Mia said that if it were her, she’d want someone she could trust. Someone who she knew would look after her even though the goal was to just have the baby. So, in my warped brain I thought of him.”
“Warped? No… I don’t think so. Abby, I’m going to give you some advice. Think of it as my last pearls of wisdom as TaylorCartwright.”
I sat up straight, ready to listen. “What? I’m eager.”
“I think Gilly might have looked into it a lot more than what you think.”
“Like how, Taylor? It was out of line for me to ask my best friend if he basically would have sex with me and get me pregnant. That’s Jerry Springer talk.”
She raised her shoulders. “Abby, I don’t think you would have asked him if the idea of having sex with your best friend was completely out of the question.”
I stared at her.
Last year, she’d mentioned something like this to me, and I told her Gilly didn’t see me that way. I still didn’t think so, because if he did, wouldn’t he have agreed?
“I just…”
She smiled. “Abby, if you could ask the man a question like that, or even to consider doing something like that for you, trust me, there’s more to this than what you’re thinking, and I really wish that you would take the time to explore it.”
I looked down at my hands and remembered that time so long ago…
Gilly and I were eighteen and we almost kissed.
It was just after the whole nightmare with my appendicitis and nearly dying. I’d nearly kissed him. In fact, I would peg it as a kiss.
We were eighteen, and it was the only time I’d ever truly considered us being more than friends. We’d almost kissed, and the next time we saw each other, I wanted so badly to ask him about it, but I freaked. I freaked and glossed over it.
Then we never mentioned it ever again. Since it was like it never happened, I went along with that. Act like it never happened.
