Page 7 of Christmas Wedding
Sawyer watched as Lorna stuck her hand completely up the turkey’s ass, and he couldn’t help but be amused by the scene. Cooking Thanksgiving dinner was turning out to be quite a challenge for her, but he liked to watch her try. She would do anything for her family, so trying to cook a turkey wasn’t asking too much. He loved the way their relationship went from nonexistent to them sharing domestic responsibilities in such a short amount of time. He knew that he wanted Lorna, but he was afraid to want everything with her. What if she wasn’t as committed to their relationship as he was? She put up such a fuss about their ages—what if she decided that he was too young for her? He didn’t want to get his hopes up, but he couldn’t help but want forever with Lorna. She became his whole world in such a short amount of time, and that scared the shit out of him. That’s probably why he acted like a complete stammering ass when Piper said that Lorna was in love with him. He wished like hell that Piper was right, but Lorna brushed it off as a joke, and what was he supposed to do? Getting down on one knee to propose marriage seemed a little much after just a few weeks of sleeping with her. But that was exactly what he wanted to do. Lorna was his whether she knew it yet or not. He knew she needed a little more time, but he didn’t want to wait too long. He was ready to spend the rest of his life with Lorna.
“You know, you could give me an extra hand with this thing.” Lorna lifted the bird, both of her hands stuck inside the carcass, and he couldn’t help his laugh.
“Looks like you’ve got things handled, honey.” Sawyer laughed at his corny joke. Lorna didn’t find him as funny.
“Yeah, I see what you did there. You are very funny. Now, please give me some help before I completely lose my temper and lob this turkey at your adorable face.” Sawyer held up his hands in defeat and helped to free her from the turkey. She washed up, and he pulled her into his arms, swaying with her to the Christmas music that they turned on.
“It’s a little early for Christmas music, don’t you think?” Lorna asked, smiling up at him.
“It is never too early for Christmas music. When I was in the military and we were stationed in remote areas during the holiday season, all I wanted for Christmas was to hear a real carol. Being away really made me appreciate the years that I was here for all the holiday trappings. I used to be a real Scrooge, but not anymore.” Sawyer kissed Lorna’s lips softly, loving the way she lay her head on his shoulder as they kept swaying.
“I loved it when Pipe was younger and her parents were still alive. Christmas was magical. It took a few years for Piper to love the holidays again after they were gone. I guess when she grew up, Christmas sort of lost its magic,” Lorna said.
“I never had a family to celebrate the holidays with, just whatever foster family I was living with at the time. I’ve never had a big family Christmas. I have to admit, I’m looking forward to spending the holidays with you and your family,” Sawyer admitted. Lorna pulled back to look up at him.
“Me too, Jonathan. I can’t wait to spend our first Christmas together.” She went up on her tiptoes to kiss his mouth, and he loved the way she sank back into his arms.
“What was Christmas morning like with Piper? Any special traditions?” Sawyer was always curious as to how real families celebrated holidays since he never really had one.
“Well, when she was really little, I was still young. I would spend the night over here so that I could wake up to see what Santa brought her. My mother died when I was little, and myfather liked to drink himself into a good slumber for most of the holiday season, so my sister and brother-in-law always included me in their traditions.” Sawyer stopped moving to the music.
“You’ve never really talked about your parents before. How old were you when your mom died?” Lorna looked a little sad, and he instantly felt bad for bringing up the subject.
“I was two and a half. My sister was fifteen years older than me. I was what they call a ‘late-life baby’. My mother had me when she was in her forties,” Lorna said.
“And your dad, what happened to him?” Sawyer felt bad for the questions, but he wanted to know everything about Lorna. He already shared about his childhood in the foster care system. He gave Lorna free rein to ask him anything about his life, and before the end of their evening, she covered most of his childhood and military career, and they didn’t get the chance to talk about her life at all.
“My dad spent most of my childhood drunk. After my mother was diagnosed with cancer, he devoted his time to caring for her, hoping that she would miraculously get better. But she didn’t, and he spiraled into this pit of booze and drugs that he couldn’t pull himself out of. No one could; my sister tried. He went out one night and didn’t come home. We found out a few months later that he died in a car accident and was listed as a John Doe. He was drunk at the time. I was seventeen and practically living here with my sister and her family. It wasn’t much of a transition, moving into this house full-time. My sister and brother-in-law opened their home to me, and I became part of their little family. After they died, it was just Pipe and me,” Lorna whispered. Sawyer kissed her forehead, wanting to chase away the demons that he helped to dredge up with his questions.
“Thank you for telling me everything. It sounds like our childhoods were similar in a lot of ways.” Lorna shook her head, framing his face with her hands.
“No, Jonathan, our experiences weren’t anything alike. I had a family; my sister made sure of that. But you didn’t. By staying with me, you could be giving up the chance of ever having that. You might not ever have children to watch run down the stairs on Christmas morning to see what Santa brought.” Lorna started to cry, and it nearly tore him apart. He couldn’t stand her tears.
“Don’t cry, Lorna,” he whispered. “I can’t stand it when you cry. I’m not giving up anything to be with you. I want you, that’s it. Anything else will just be a bonus. You are enough for me.” He gently kissed her lips, wiping away her falling tears.
“But, what if it’s not enough for me?” Lorna asked. “Being with you has changed so much for me. I never thought that I wanted a family, not after losing mine. But you’ve given me hope, and that scares me, Jonathan. What if I can’t have what I’m wishing for? What if I’m too old to start a family?” Sawyer pulled Lorna into his arms, squeezing her so tightly he was afraid she would pop. The idea of Lorna wanting to have children with him made him so happy that he didn’t know if he would be able to get any words out at all.
“Didn’t you just say that your mom had you later in life? Maybe it is possible, but we won’t know unless we take a chance.” Sawyer didn’t know where he was going with this, but he was sure that he would regret not taking a chance on Lorna. “I think that I’m falling in love with you, Lorna.” There, he said it. There was no taking those words back, even if he wanted to. She looked at him like he had lost his mind, her expression almost comical.
“Jonathan, how can you be sure?” Lorna pulled away from him, finding her way over to a chair and practically falling into it. Not exactly the response he was hoping for.
“I know because I’ve never felt this way about anyone else in my life. When you talk about your past Christmases, I see all myfuture ones—with you. I know this is sudden, and I don’t expect you to say anything that you aren’t feeling, but?—”
Lorna didn’t let him finish. “Well, I feel the same way about you, Jonathan Sawyer. Except, I’m not falling in love with you, I’m already there.” Sawyer pulled her from her chair, lifting her into his arms, and he made his way from the kitchen to the stairs.
“What about the turkey?” Lorna asked, breathlessly.
“Let him find his own damn woman,” he grumbled. Sawyer carried her up to their bed and kicked the door shut behind them. He didn’t want to think about anyone or anything except Lorna, and he would shut out the world just to do that.
CHAPTER FIVE
Lorna woke up the next morning feeling completely run down. Today was not the day to feel like she was hit by a tractor-trailer and left for dead on the side of the highway. Sawyer persuaded her to run in to see the doctor. She tried to tell him that she was fine, but he wasn’t budging on the matter. Her doctor’s office had limited hours, so she went in before lunch. She needed to help get the meal together, and she also wanted to make sure that the house was ready. Hosting their first holiday together was turning out to be a big deal.
After admitting that they were in love with each other, she and Sawyer spent the rest of the evening in bed. They stayed up most of the night making love and talking about the future. That was probably what led to her being dead on her feet, but she wasn’t about to tell Sawyer that. Admitting that she wanted kids but was afraid to hope for them was emotionally draining. If she were being completely honest with herself, she always wanted kids, but she just never found a person that she wanted to have them with. Sawyer being in her life opened so many possibilities that she never let herself hope for.
She waited to see the doctor, and when he finally checked her over, he decided to take some blood to check for an infection. He also wanted to run some tests just to be on the safe side. By the time she left the doctor’s office, she felt ready for a nap. She stopped at the local grocery store to pick up a few last-minute items that they forgot. When she got home, Sawyer had the oven going with four pies, and he was working on the stuffing and glazed carrots.
“It smells so good in here. I wish today were Thanksgiving.” Lorna wrapped her arms around Sawyer from behind, kissing his jaw.
