Page 35 of Make the Play
Emerson’s expression takes on an unfamiliar edge, his body language radiating discomfort in a way that makes Jason want to have a strong word with every person responsible for making Emerson feel this way.
“Seriously, fuck people who make kids feel bad,” Jason says, glad his windows are up so the students hovering nearby in the parking lot can’t hear him. He’s not in the mood to mince words right now. “The absolute biggest ‘fuck you’ to them.”
“It’s okay, Jason.”
“It’s not though.” Jason shakes his head, pulling into one of the teacher parking spots. He flips off the ignition but makes no move to get out. “My brother Alec was one of those kids that was a lot to handle, too fidgety and loud, always got in trouble for talking back. He was a good fucking kid, but he wasn’t built to sit in a square in kindergarten, or to have calm hands or a quiet mouth or whatever other ableist bullshit they spewed that made him feel so bad about himself. It pisses me the fuck off.” Jason takes a deep breath, not wanting to upset Emerson with his tirade but also unable to stop himself. “Adults should be there to support kids, not tear them down. So fuck anyone who made you think the way you processed information or what you needed was wrong.”
“Jason.”
“Fuck them, Emerson.”
“Okay,” Emerson whispers, staring at Jason with wide eyes and an unreadable expression.
“I’m sorry,” Jason says with every ounce of conviction he can muster. “It just makes me so mad. I think most people, most teachers are really fucking great, but there are always some who aren’t and—and they don’t matter. They’re not your people.”
“I’m not sure I have people,” Emerson says in a tone that sounds matter of fact, yet manages to threaten to break Jason’s heart into tiny little pieces. He wants to protect Emerson with a ferocity that takes him by surprise, the same kind of intense need he’d felt when he met Theo on the playground. Friendship isn’t as simple as it was back when he was a kid, and yet Jason can’t help but wonder why it can’t be. Emerson is great—sweet, smart and easy to be around. If he wants them to be friends, then he should make it happen.
“Come to my place on Saturday,” Jason blurts, an idea taking shape.
“Why?”
“Pizza,” Jason answers. “You like pizza right?”
“I like cheese pizza,” Emerson offers, the slightest tilt to his head, like Jason is something he doesn’t understand. Truth be told, Jason hardly understands himself right now. All he knows is that Emerson deserves people, and Jason has good people, the kind who would like Emerson just as much as Jason does if they got to know him, he’s sure of it.
“Good, then I’ll order cheese pizza, and you’ll come to my house. You can meet my dogs.”
“I like dogs.” Emerson sits just a little bit taller.
“You can meet Alec and Theo too.”
“Wait, what?” Emerson blinks.
“Theo and me have a weekly pizza night. Usually we do Friday nights, but during football season it gets moved to Saturdays. And now that Theo and Alec are together, Alec usually comes. Sometimes he’s hanging out with his friends or too busy studying, but I’m pretty sure he’s coming this weekend. We switch off weeks, and last weekend was at Theo’s place, which means this week is at my house, so it’s perfect.”
“Perfect,” Emerson utters like the word is entirely foreign to him. “You want me to meet your brother and your best friend? Are you sure? I don’t want to intrude or anything. I’m not…fun.”
“I think you’re fun,” Jason tells him.
“I dunno,” Emerson mumbles.
“You don’t have to,” Jason hurries, wanting to give him a choice. Yet once those words are out, they don’t sit quite right. He can’t explain why this is so important, only knows it is and while he doesn’t want Emerson to feel pressured, he really wants him there. “But it would make me really happy if you came.”
“You want me there?” Emerson asks as if there is actually a question.
The bell rings, but for once neither of them move, not even Emerson, though Jason knows he’s heard it.
“I really want you there,” Jason confirms. Then he waits.
Outside the truck, students are laughing and yelling as they hurry to class, but Jason is frozen, watching the slow rise and fall of Emerson’s chest before he nods. “Alright, I’ll come.”
* * *
Jason adjuststhe couch pillows for the fourth time in the last fifteen minutes, giving Stella what he hopes is a very serious expression.
“You leave them alone this time now.”
Stella barks, leaping onto the couch and knocking the pillows to the floor. Jason sighs, giving up and gathering them up. He hasn’t been able to use couch pillows since he got Stella who, for reasons unknown to Jason, hates them. When it’s just Theo or his brothers, he doesn’t bother, but since Emerson is coming, he’d wanted the place to look nice.
