Page 51 of Fireworks at Pennycress Inn
Leaning against his arm, Polly nodded. ‘I did. And I keep reminding myself that my grandma literally told me to sell it and use the money towards a new place. She made me promise to go for my new start, but I still just feel… guilty. I feel as though I shouldn’t be doing it. That doesn’t make sense, does it?’
‘It does. But it’s what she wanted. That’s worth remembering.’
Dragging the back of her hand across her face, she dried the tears. ‘I know. I know I need to remember that. It’s just…’
‘You feel as though you’re closing the door on that part of your life? On the memories of them?’ Zac pulled her closer.
Polly nodded. That was just it. That’s exactly how she felt. She so desperately wanted this fresh start, the chance to follow her own dreams and make the changes in her life she’d longed for, but now it was about to become a reality. She wasn’t quite sure she was ready to let go. ‘Yes, exactly that.’
‘Growing up, I used to spend a lot of my time at my grandparents’ house. My parents were often away for weeks at a stretch, on business or going to this charity event or that, so I’d go to my grandparents’. I had my own room there and, to be quite honest, I often felt more wanted, more nurtured by them than my own parents. When my grandpa passed away, their house was sold, and my gran moved into an annexe at my parents’ place.’
Twisting in his embrace, she looked at him. There was so much she hadn’t known about him. ‘So you understand then?’
‘Yep, I do. To a point, anyway. Even though it was me dealing with it all – the estate agents, the solicitors and then the builders at my parents’ place – the driving force behind the sale of my grandparents’ home was my dad.’ Settling back against the bench, he took her hand in his free one. ‘So, I understand, to a degree. It was just after I’d quit my job in the city, but if I’d had the money, I’d have snapped up their house.’
‘So, you think I should pull out of the sale?’ Polly watched as another duck swam furtively towards the small group she’d been watching.
‘Nope. That’s not what I think. If I’d had the money, I would have brought my grandparents’ house, and I’d have lived in it, quite happy surrounded by the memories of my childhood and the time I had with my grandparents.’ He smiled at the memories.
‘But you said you think I should sell?’ Polly frowned. What did he mean?
‘Yes, if I’d bought the house, then I’d have been surrounded my grandparents’ things, but I’d also have been…’ He shifted a little on the bench. ‘Stuck, I guess the word is. I’d never have wanted to get rid of it, to sell it on and I think that would have ended up limiting what I felt I could do and that’s not what my grandparents would have wanted.’
‘I see.’ She nodded. She thought she understood. ‘So, you’re glad you weren’t in a position to buy it?’
‘Yes, I think so. It took me a while to come to that realisation though. To begin with I just felt anger towards my dad for forcing the sale. Of course, I wasn’t aware of just how much trouble his business was in at the time, which is why I couldn’t understand why he just didn’t keep it, rent it out to me, maybe.’
Polly felt his shoulder shrug beneath her cheek and waited until he continued.
‘I have all the memories I could ever need up here.’ He lifted the hand he was holding hers with, drawing both their hands to his head before lowering them again. ‘I’ve come to realise I don’t need the physical stuff to remember them by and to remember the times we shared whilst I was growing up. No one can take those away from me.’
‘That makes sense.’ Polly sighed heavily. ‘Deep down, I know it’s the right thing to do and so I guess I’ve just got to get through it.’
‘Unfortunately, yes. Any change is difficult, even more so than when a loved one has passed and you’re faced with making decisions like this, but your grandparents’ hard work and the hours they spent decorating and making their flat a home, they did that for you. And this, selling it, it’s not getting rid of all of their efforts, they wanted their life’s work to do good for you, they wanted to make a difference to your life, and this is what the money you’ll get from the sale will do.’
Polly laced her fingers through his. ‘So, I just need to remember that their work still goes on. It’s still making a difference to me?’
‘Exactly. Try not to feel guilty for selling the flat, because ultimately that’s what they wanted. They wanted you to go on and live your life.’
Polly smiled. Her grandma had said those exact words. She’d made her promise to sell. ‘Thank you. I needed to be reminded of that.’
‘So, how do you fancy going out for dinner to celebrate? The sale of your flat and the success of your leaflet idea.’
‘I’d like that.’ Polly slapped her forehead. ‘Although I need to go and buy those raffle prizes.’
Zac chuckled. ‘Right, shopping first, dinner after?’
‘Sounds perfect.’ Leaning back into his arm, Polly closed her eyes. She listened to the clucking of the ducks on the water and the crunch of fallen leaves as someone ambled past. The flat was sold, and that was a good thing. It really was.
29
‘How about this one?’ Zac called across the aisle of the toy shop as he threw something towards her.
Polly screeched as she caught the large, hairy stuffed spider toy. ‘Jeez, for a moment I literally thought that was real!’
Placing his hands on his knees, Zac let out a belly laugh. ‘Your face was priceless!’
‘Haha, thanks so much!’ Polly tried her best to keep her voice serious before her own laughter broke through her scowl. ‘You know what, I think this one might actually be a good shout. It looks pretty realistic, which the kids will probably love.’
