Page 46 of Light My Fire Three Times
What a fucking mess.
NOVEMBER 22ND
The quiet in the house is almost suffocating.
It’s the evening, and Karl’s gone to work. I can feel the strain of the day settling in, and it’s not the kind of stress you can shake off easily.
Olivia and I have been avoiding each other for most of the day, and the tension is stagnant.
Neither of us has said much, which is fine by me. I don’t really want to talk to her, and I can’t imagine she’s thrilled to see me either.
But itdoesseem she’s staying for yet another night.
Brilliant.
She’s out on the porch, leaning against the railing, staring into the distance. It’s remarkable how someone so small can occupy so much space in a room.
I thought I was good at ignoring things, but with her in the house…it's a whole different story. The way she breathes, the way she moves… everything about her feels too much.
The smell of coffee lingers in the air, and I realize I’m probably just looking for something to distract myself from the fact that, deep down, I’m kind of… hoping she’s doing okay.
I should have checked in with her earlier. But that would’ve been weird, right?
I shake my head and grab a beer from the fridge. I need to stop thinking about this shit. I’m not trying to care or anything. But as soon as I take the first swig, I hear the creak of the door, and I look up to find Olivia standing in the doorway, her hands tucked into the pockets of her hoodie.
She looks… tired. Not the exhausted, overworked kind of tired, but the tired that comes from being too in your head for too long. She gives me this quick, awkward smile, then walks over to the kitchen, pulling out a mug.
“You, uh… need something?” I ask, trying to sound casual. As if all is just fine, thank you very much.
She looks over her shoulder at me, brow furrowing. “I was just… thinking I’d make another cup of coffee.”
Right. Of course. I watch her for a second. There’s that familiar awkwardness hanging in the air. The space between usis just… too far. It’s hard to believe we’ve ever been anything more than enemies.
“Listen, about the whole… bumping into one another thing,” I say, rubbing the back of my neck. I can’t believe I’m going to apologize. “I was an asshole. I shouldn’t have said what I did. I know I can be a dick sometimes. But calling you a bitch? That was way out of line. I’m sorry.”
She freezes, holding the mug halfway to the counter, and when she turns around, I can see that her lips are pressed tight. She’s trying to keep a lid on whatever’s bubbling inside her.
“I… okay,” she shoots back. “Thanks for saying that. But I don’t need your apology, Leo. Honestly, I don’t. I’m here, and…”
“Here for a while, right?”
Her eyes snap to the floor. “Karl said it would be okay.”
I can feel my temper stirring, but I clamp down on it, knowing this is going nowhere fast if we start bickering now. “Without consulting me, again.”
She shakes her head, her eyes narrowing slightly. “You know, you’re good at pretending you’re the victim here. You’ve got this whole ‘I’m just misunderstood’ thing down. But let’s be real… you don’t like me, Leo. And I don’t like you.”
The words hit me harder than I expected, but I can’t let her see that. I take another drink from my beer, trying to keep calm.
“If I don’t like you, then why am I okay with letting you be here?”
Her eyes flash with what might be anger, or frustration, or both. “Karl said it would be fine, and I didn’t know he hadn’t cleared it with you.”
“You didn’t know…?” I repeat, my own frustration creeping in. “Cool, well that’s just fine then.”
She looks at me for a long beat, and I can feel the air between us crackling with some tension that neither of us can seemto shake. She crosses her arms over her chest, her gaze never leaving mine.
“I thought I could stay here without you turning this into some kind of issue,” she snaps. “But I guess I was wrong.”
