Page 58 of Ropers Can't Tie Knots
“Yes. And I wasn’t coming home until I found you.”
Riley’s words echo in my head, and I turn to look at Hunter. “We n-need to t-talk,” I chatter, and Hunter nods slowly.
“Yeah, we do, counsellor.” He brushes his knuckles over my cheek. “But let’s get you warm first, okay? We have a lot to work out.”
He hugs me closer, and I burrow into the blanket and his side while I cautiously hope we’re on the same page.
sixteen
Hunter
Gabe’s shivering has finally stopped, and he’s curled into my side like a contented cat. The fire crackles and pops, and it’s times like right now that I’m happy I kept the old wood-burning fireplace.
There’s nothing like a wood fire to shake the chill from your bones.
Along with Gabe’s shivering, my heart rate is back to normal. The longer it took for me to hear from him, the more I panicked that I’d lost my chance, and something terrible had happened. Sudden snowstorms here are fairly normal, and I know he’s a capable driver, but that car of his isn’t suitable for winter on the back roads.
I could kid myself and say that’s all it was, concern over him driving in a snowstorm, but I kicked my own ass and admitted it was because I was afraid I’d lost yet another person I loved.
It’s been decades since the night I lost my parents in a car accident during a snowstorm. The longer it took for him to arrive, the louder the thoughts of‘not again’grew.
Just because I’ve accepted I’m in love with this man doesn’t make it easier for me to put all my feelings into words, though. Too many years of staying quiet and never expressing my feelingsis a hard habit to break. But things are finally turning around for me in my life. The will has been mostly sorted. I’m not hovering near bankruptcy, and the business Jackson and I have discussed for years is coming to fruition.
I even have a new beginning in rodeo lined up with Levi.
But I’m missing something I never allowed myself to wish for.
What’s missing is someone to laugh with and share stories on the porch swing. A person to talk through crossword clues with. Someone who loves this country life like I do and puts up with my moods, not because they have to, but because they know it’s just how I am.
And hugs.
Since I met Gabe, I wasn’t aware of how much I missed hugs. Sure, I bro hug my friends, and now that I’m back to visiting Margie, I get her mom hugs, too, but nothing can replace that feeling of warmth and love when a person hugs you simply because they want you in their arms and love you.
That’s how Gabe hugs me. Like he never wants to let go.
“You’re awfully quiet.” Gabe murmurs. “What’s on your mind?”
“You, actually.”
Gabe lifts his head from my shoulder and shifts around his blanket cocoon. “Oh?”
Okay. I can do this. I said we’d talk, and I’ve avoided this for too long. He deserves to know how I feel. Reaching over, I run my thumb over the plush lips I love so much.
“I want a divorce,” I whisper.
Gabe’s lip quivers, and he shifts away from me. “You’re the king of mixed signals, Hunter.” He clears his throat. “I refuse. I more than refuse, in fact. Would you like to know why?”
His voice grows louder until he stands and drops the blanket while he paces in front of the fire completely bare-assed except for the soft, green sweater.
“I love you. Okay?” He throws his hands in the air. “I didn’t think I would, but I do. I love it when you leave me unfinished crosswords, and you hold me when I’m sad. I love the way you call me counsellor, and I love how you make me feel.” He pauses and turns towards me, dick bouncing against his thigh as his agitation grows. “I love the man that you are, Hunter. I refuse to believe you want to walk away from us and forfeit money to an organization that hates people like us for existing. If you want a divorce, at least wait until then, but know that I don’t want to leave.”
His chest heaves, and a single tear slides down his cheek, breaking my heart. Further proof I’m not good at this kind of thing. I didn’t mean to make him cry.
“I love you, too, Gabe.” Standing, I reach to wipe the tear from his cheek as confusion fills his handsome face.
“What?”
“I probably should have led with that.” Grimacing, I reach for his hand. “I’m not good at…feelings and shit, but I fell for you, Gabe. Harder than I ever thought was possible.”
