Page 111 of My Brother's Enemy
Such guilt pooled in her eyes. “I couldn’t bring myself to turn my phone back on, and that was wrong,” she said softly. “I hid, and I isolated, and I pulled away. That’s always been my go-to. I did that growing up because that’s where I was safe, and I did that when I got older because I kept getting hurt, and I didn’t know what I was doing wrong. But I shouldn’t have done that with you.” She gripped my arms. “I’ve been cautious my whole life, and suddenly there you are, and you came in hot and fast. The first time you kissed me, I didn’t know what was happening. You woke up all these emotions in me that I didn’t know were there anymore. All my attempts at relationships have failed, and I’d accepted that I’d be alone all my life.”
That broke me to hear.
She rested her forehead on my chest, and I ran a hand down her hair and back, soothing her.
“You came along, and for the first time, I’m thinking there’s more,” she continued. Her hands slid down to the front of my shirt and fisted it. She lifted her head, and her eyes were glassy.“You are giving memore.” She broke off as a tear slid down her cheek.
I cupped the back of her neck, smoothing my thumb over her face. Yes. There was so much more here. I bent down to rest my forehead against hers. “You can tell me whenever you want. You don’t have to say it all now.”
She drew in a breath and closed her eyes, some tension leaving her body. “You deserve to know it all.”
I framed the sides of her face with both my hands. “We have time. You’re not going anywhere.” I looked into her eyes. “Right?”
She shook her head, a smile breaking over her face. “No. I’m not running anymore. I’m not hiding, but Tyler, you have to know that the way I grew up, I was conditioned to believe no one would want me. I’m messed up in the head.”
“Babe,” I whispered. “We all are.”
She laughed.
I grinned, loving that sound from her.
She wiped the rest of her tears away. “I’m sorry for hiding the last few days.”
I took that in, needing it to ground me.
Her eyes shifted down. “I shouldn’t have hidden from you.”
“No, you shouldn’t have.” I tilted her head back up again. “But that’s over with, because now I know your ways. I’m going to put a tracker on you somewhere.” I wasn’t kidding, but she laughed as if I were. “Maybe your shoes or your bag.”
So not joking.
“Look,” I told her. “I have things to say to you too. Serious things.”
Her face changed. “What are they? You don’t want to keep doing this with me?” Pain flared in her eyes. Fresh and stricken. “I get it, Tyler. I do. I’m a?—”
I sealed my mouth over hers. I needed her to stop talking.Now. She surged against me, and I decided enough was enough. I lifted my head enough to say, “We can talk later, but do me a favor and stop thinking I’m going anywhere. You turned your phone off. It’s not a big deal in the grand scheme of things. I outed us without your permission. Of the two of us, I should be the one hiding, and for everything else, you’ve done nothing wrong. Your dad is a piece of shit. Your brothers are pieces of shit. You are a fucking treasure. So when your brain starts going sideways, tell it to fuck off, okay? For me? Or think,what would Tyler tell my brain to do?” I pressed my forehead back to hers. “Please don’t ghost me again, though. I don’t think I could bear it.”
She studied me a moment, her cute little eyebrows pulling low. “Tyler?”
Should I…? Oh. Fuck it.
I stopped holding back and let it show on my face. “I love you.”
Her eyes got big, really big. “What?”
“I am in love with you, and, babe, I’ve only ever loved five people in my life. My parents, the woman who took us in, and Skylar and Zoey. That’s it.” Well, some of my friends too, but that was semantics. “When I love someone, I will do anything for them, and you’re in there. You got in. I love you, Rain.”
More tears slid from her eyes. She stared at me in wonder. “No one’s ever told me that.”
“What do you mean?”
“No one’s ever told me they loved me.”
“Your mom?”
She shook her head. “If she did, I don’t remember. I have happy memories with her, so she must’ve. But you’re the first person I can remember telling me that.” She pressed against me. “Thank you. I?—”
I touched the side of her face. “You don’t have to say it back just because I said it. I didn’t say it for that reason. It’s just the truth. I actually triednotto say it, because I didn’t want to scare you away.”
