Page 17 of Havoc and Humor
“You saw through that? Huh?”
His eyes drifted toward the screen where my presentation was displayed. “What is this?”
“I have a presentation for all the ways I fucked up, and I’m hoping it will persuade you to see this merger from my perspective.”
“Merger?”
“Well, I’m sure you’ve noticed there’s been significant growth in our relationship this quarter. I’m hoping to maximize on our current status. It’s high-risk, high-reward. I’m willing to put in the work. For us, Sawyer.”
A smile. It was small, but I saw it.
I leapt at the opportunity and clicked the pointer to begin the presentation. “Sit down, please.”
“You didn’t lose any reports, did you?” He crossed his arms over his chest, but he wasn’t leaving.
“No. Everything’s safe on my laptop.”
He rolled his eyes and his lips pinched like he was fighting a smile. “Fine, but this is ridiculous, Mark.”
“It is. You deserve ridiculous. Can I begin?”
He waved his hand in aplease-domotion.
“Current state analysis,” I began. “We’ve been operating at a less-than-optimal state due to conflicting priorities and information silos.”
“Suboptimal? We work better together than anyone.”
“Please hold you comments and questions until the end,” I said.
Sawyer settled onto the couch. His arms were still folded over his chest. He had changed from his work clothes to a more relaxed T-shirt and sweatpants.
“The problem isn’t our compatibility, it’s the structural barriers preventing us from achieving our full potential. These strengths, weaknesses, opportunities, and threats are all present at our current and desired state.”
“And what is our desired state?”
“Please hold your questions,” I reminded him.
I clicked through the slides quicker now. I even included a decision tree for our various relationship scenarios, as well as key relationship milestones we’d already hit.
“Hold on, you consider laser tag our first date? Not the night I crashed at your place when Jeremiah and I broke up?”
I shook my head. “That was more of an exploration session to see if we were on the same page.”
Sawyer smiled and relaxed with each slide I worked through.
One of the last slides got to the heart of the issue. “Realignment” the title read.
“I made the wrong decision when I didn’t speak with you about the job change.”
Sawyer bit his lip. “You’re moving jobs so we can be together?”
I nodded. “It’s the only way.”
“You love your job. I love working with you.”
My heart sank. If he chose his job over me, I would have to accept that. Except, could I stay in this position if we weren’t together? We had still crossed the line. I’d tasted his lips and felt his skin against mine. I knew what I was missing, and my feelings for him wouldn’t change.
“This is the most ridiculous, over-the-top thing I’ve ever seen. It’s...” He stood up, walking closer to where I stood next to the projector screen. “I can’t believe how much I love it. Love you.”
