Page 21 of Out of the Shadows
DANIEL
Screening out my colleagues idle chat, I drum my fingers on the desk as we await Cosmo. I didn’t want to have him called in, but my fellow board members are keen tohave it from the horse’s mouth, as one of them put it.
There’s a light knock on the door, and I realise I’m holding my breath. Silently, slowly, I release it and let my gaze drop to the report in front of me before Cosmo walks in. The report I’d said needed more meat, more depth. It was pretty good to begin with, in all truthfulness, but now it shines.
“Cosmo, sorry about the short notice. This is a very good report so thank you, but there are just one or two points we’d like clarification on.”
The calm and friendly voice of Linda, the HR director. A voice like velvet, and a will of steel. Like me, like everybody around the table, she’s been hand picked by William Kingsbury.
I look up — and wish to god I hadn’t.Christ, what a mess.
It’s not the Cosmo of last night I was expecting to see, all tight jeans and T-shirt, but it’s certainly not this version of him. My jaw tightens and I grind my teeth.
“That’s fine, not a problem at all. I’ll be happy to answer any questions you have.” He takes a seat, and it’s just as well he sits down, because he doesn’t look fit to stand.
I glare at him but he avoids my eye, and I glance at my fellow directors. Surely they must see what I’m seeing? But there’s not a flicker on their faces.
Linda pushes over a paper copy of the report for him. “Item three-point-two, could you clarify what exactly you mean by life style integrations?”
Cosmo flicks through the report, his fingers nervy and shaky. I grind my teeth some more. He starts to speak but I don’t hear a word he says because all I can take in is what a wreck he looks.
The whites of his eyes are bloodshot, the moss green irises dull and tired, and there are deep shadows beneath his eyes. He’s not shaved this morning, and dark stubble shadows his pallid, washed-out face. The look is less designer and more woke up with a hangover and couldn’t be arsed. I wrinkle my nose as I detect the faint stench of old booze in the warm air; I scratch my nails on the table top, and grind my teeth. My colleagues are smiling and nodding at the answers he’s giving, but Jesus, can’t they see the state he’s in?
I carry on glaring at him, but not once does he look at me. His suit is crumpled, his shirt’s so creased it looks like he slept in it, and his tie is askew… And what the hell isthaton it? I lean forward but it’s not to look at the report I know almost word for word, it’s to get a closer look at his tie. Whatisthat? A grease stain? He’s a disgrace. As a member of my team, it reflects badly on me.
“Excellent. Thank you, Cosmo,” Linda says. “I think that more than clarifies. Any questions on this point? No? Then let’s move to section five.”
I flick through my copy. It’s specifically the section about targeting the LGBT+ market.
“Yes, it’s a market that’s ripe for exploitation.”
His gaze meets mine, the first time he’s looked at me since coming into the boardroom. Cosmo’s quoting my words back at me and I feel warmth rise in my face. He’s certainly not slouching in the chair, but even so he straightens up and pulls his shoulders back, tilting his chin up as he does so. It’s as though he’s readying himself for a challenge and for a moment I forget the mess he’s in.
“Tell us, how do you…” I only half hear the question from another colleague, along with the ones which follow, because all my attention is on Cosmo. He answers the questions with depth and authority but then I suppose it’s a world he knows and understands intimately.
“I think that’s all.” Linda smiles as she looks round the table. My colleagues nod. “Daniel? Do you have anything to ask or to add? Although I’m sure the two of you have already discussed the contents at some length.”
She’s looking at me, waiting for my answer. I tell her no.
“Thank you, Cosmo, a very interesting and insightful report. I’m sure Daniel agrees.”
It’s his prompt to leave and he does so without casting another glance my way.
We wrap up the rest of our business soon after. I gather up my papers and as my colleagues stand around and chat, making no attempt to leave, I stride from the boardroom with one thought and one thought only, in mind.
* * *
I throw back the office door with more force than I intend and it bounces against a filing cabinet with a loud bang. Fiona almost jumps out of her seat and spills some of whatever is in the mug she’s holding. She looks at me as though I’ve gone mad and I might just well have.
“Where’s Cosmo?”
“He’s getting himself a coffee, he’ll—”
“As soon as he’s back tell him I need to see him in my office. Immediately.”
I’m gone before she can blink and, back in my office, I stare out over the sweeping view of London, breathing deep, using all the tricks and techniques Geraldine taught me to keep me calm and centred, but they’re useless in the face of my rage.
A few minutes later there’s a knock at the door. I swing round and before I can bark come in, it swings open. Cosmo’s hovering on the threshold and although he’s straightened his tie and has made some effort to pull himself together he’s still a mess.
