Page 56 of Out of the Shadows
What if he’s regretting his confession?
What if he thinks I should leave, now, with all my possessions piled up in a cardboard box?
I run my fingers through my hair, before I pull it back into shape. No, because he wouldn’t do that.Would he?He wouldn’t be another Leon Chambers.Would he?
My stomach rumbles and rolls, and I feel vaguely queasy because I don’t know, not for sure. There’s only one way to find out. One final look around to see I’ve got everything before I’m out the door and heading to the tube station and for whatever might be awaiting me at the office.
* * *
“… I met him at my friend’s party, on Saturday, and we’re going for dinner tomorrow evening. He’s an actor and was in a play calledWhoops! There Goes Another One.It was a sell out in Croydon, apparently. And Watford, I think. Or was it Gravesend? Whatever, it’s voice overs he specialises in. He’s the voice of Colin Carrot in that campaign to get kids to eat more veg—Cosmo are you listening to me?”
Fiona, perched on my desk, scowls at me.
“Of course I am.”Of course I’m not…“You’re going out with a guy who likes carrots? Sounds like a match made in heaven.”
She tuts and rolls her eyes as she gets up. “Are you all right? You seem really distracted.”
“I’m fine. Just got a few things on my mind, that’s all.”
She raises a brow as interest sparkles in her eyes. I swallow a groan, knowing I’ve said the wrong thing. If she’s thinking about questioning me, I’m saved by the blast from my desk phone, which I grab for the life saver it is.
A couple of minutes later I hunker down behind my computer screen, but my attention keeps flitting to the door, my heart jumping each time it opens.
It’s late morning, and I’ve not seen Daniel. He’s out at a meeting, I heard somebody say. I want to ask when he’ll be back, but bite my tongue. I want him to walk through the door as much as I don’t. I want to see him as much as I don’t. I want to work out what’s happening as much as I don’t. I want—
“Cosmo, do you have a minute? Cosmo?”
I almost jump out of my seat, and just about save my untouched mug of coffee from going flying. I’ve been so caught up in what I want and what I don’t, I’ve not noticed Daniel come into the office. He’s standing over me, a smile shadowing his lips. Clean shaven, immaculate, the light aroma of his expensive, understated cologne… and as he looks down at me, I know exactly what and who it is I want.
“Yes, of course.” I cough to clear the catch in my throat, racing to catch up with him as he strides away.
We reach his office, and he stands aside to let me in, flicks the sign to Do Not Disturb, and closes the door. The blinds are closed on the glass walls. Whatever’s in store for me, it’s private. He’s had the weekend to think over what he did, what he said… My heart rate picks up… A transfer at best… Time to move on…
“Are you okay? You’ve gone as white as a sheet.”
Daniel lays a hand on my shoulder, and gently massages.
Thank god we’re standing by the leather sofa, over by the floor to ceiling window, because my legs buckle and I sink down on to it.
“Cosmo?” Daniel says, voice and eyes filled with concern. “Seriously, are you unwell? Should I call—?”
“No.” I shake my head. “A bit of a panic, I guess.” I glance up at him, before my gaze ducks away. “I, erm, thought you might be calling me in to tell me it’s for the best—”
“That you leave? That I’m arranging a transfer to another company within the Kingsbury Group?”
I look up at him, meeting his gaze. “Well, it’s a possibility, isn’t it? Now you’ve had time to consider everything.”
He says nothing as he stares into my eyes. His expression’s fallen into deadpan and inscrutable, and I have no idea what he’s thinking. I can’t tear my eyes away. I can’t move and can barely breathe.
“I’ve thought about what we talked about, I’ve considered it from every angle. What we said to each other, what we did, I’ve thought about nothing else. I even wrote a list or pros and cons.” He smiles, and as he does so he cups my cheek with his palm. Letting my breath go, I press into the warmth.
“A list. Why didn’t you go the whole hog and set up a spreadsheet?”
He laughs and I join in. My heart rate slows, and I breathe in deep.
“Our situation, it’s difficult.” His laughter dies and he looks away. He drops his hand from my face as his brow puckers and when he speaks, it’s as though he’s answering questions only he can hear. “I’m more than twenty years older than you. We work together. There could be accusations of partisanship, on my part. It’s unprofessional, and although I’m not an employee of Kingsbury, it’s splitting hairs. And this is new to me. All of it.”
All of it…
