Page 37 of Meeting Mr. Adorkable
Lucian’s lips twisted into a humorless smile at Arlo’s frown of incomprehension.
“He was a banker, and he’d taken a job in the Bahamas. He relocated and hadn’t bothered to tell me. I think that’s what really hurt, that he didn’t think I was worth him mentioning it to. Anyway, it put paid to whatever it was we were. I’m just sorry, looking back, that I didn’t have the guts to end it myself, and a whole lot sooner.”
“Don’t beat yourself up about it. If somebody constantly erodes who you are, it undermines you.”
“Was it like that with you and—” Lucian winced. “Sorry, it’s not my business.”
“Tony? No.” Arlo shook his head. “We had our problems, and toward the end, the arguments grew vicious on both sides, but that kind of picking away wasn’t part of it. So you came to the Creek to get over a guy. Sounds kind of familiar.” Arlo held out his bottle, and Lucian clinked his own against it.
“I needed a change. I can see it now — somewhere different, even if I used the not very scientific method of sticking a pin in a map. But The Shit isn’t the only reason everybody thought it best I take a break.”
Arlo quirked his head.
“We’re a prestigious venue for corporate events and society weddings. Danebury Manor is very expensive to book. There was an incident involving a bride on her wedding day. It cost the business a lot of money. I don’t think it was my fault, but that’s not how everybody else saw it. It was the bee,” he blurted.
“The bee?”
Lucian nodded his head hard. “We were hosting the wedding for the Bridezilla from hell. Nothing, and I mean nothing, we did was right from the very moment they made the booking. And she seemed to take an instant dislike to me, but then, I suppose, I shouldn’t have told her that her ideas for the design of her bouquet looked like a giant and very erect cock.”
Arlo spluttered. “You said—”
“I know, I know. I opened my mouth too wide and stuffed my foot straight in. Didn’t I tell you I have a problem with filter? After she had her fit, and my sister calmed her down, she deigned to take advice about the bouquet design. Or some. But at least she wouldn’t have clutched a floral phallus as she walked down the aisle on her big day.
“When the wedding day came around, everything was going to plan, and the service was beautiful. She was even bearable, or just about. The weather was perfect, a rare, warm, summer’s day. The photographer asked her to bring the bouquet to her face, as though she was sniffing it. And that’s when it happened. The bee, which had been snoozing amongst the blooms, didn’t like her nose invading its privacy, so it decided to fly off — straight up her left nostril.
“Everything went crazy. She was rolling around on the ground screaming, everybody was screaming, and a very pregnant lady went into labor. Ambulances were called, and they carted the pregnant lady off to hospital. But it was too late for the poor bee, because by the time the paramedics arrived, it was dead.”
“The poor bee?”
“If you’d encountered the woman, you’d be thinking poor bee, too. Once they sting, they die. The paramedics got it out, but it wasn’t easy because the bride’s face had swollen up so badly. She didn’t actually go into anaphylactic shock, but her reaction was severe enough to warrant adrenaline being injected into her thigh, and to be taken to hospital to be put on an IV drip and pumped full of antihistamine.
“The wedding reception had to be abandoned. We knew there’d be an insurance claim, but she also went the legal route. The compensation she was going for was eye watering. Among a whole checklist of stuff they were claiming for, all of which was utter bullshit, they were citing health and safety breaches. There was no bee in the bouquet when I checked it. What happened was down to a fluke that a bee had decided he was going to get cozy among the flowers. It was sheer bad luck. It wasn’t our fault her day was ruined, because it was nobody’s fault.”
Lucian put down his bottle on the tiny coffee table and squeezed his hands together.
“The insurance covered some, but not all of what was being claimed for. After negotiations between our respective legal teams, we reached an out of court settlement. It was expensive, and the whole affair was very stressful for my mum, brother, and sister, who’d built the company. It was that or risk terrible publicity, which in such a competitive business…”
“Wow, that’s quite a story. Did you come out to the States soon after?”
Lucian nodded. “There was a family conference, and they persuaded me to step away from the business for a while. Things had got too much for me, they said, and I needed a change and to take time out. I could hardly disagree because I was a mess, and we all knew it. Everything seemed to happen on top of each other. The thing with Miles, the ruined wedding, the fire—”
“The…?”
Lucian cringed, knowing Arlo would think he was deranged, but it was too late to backtrack, so he took a deep breath. He’d told parts one and two, so he might as well go for the hat trick.
“We have a large outbuilding where I put together all the floral displays, bouquets, etc. I’d been experimenting with some new designs for large static displays, as we were hosting an event for a major City bank a few days after the wedding disaster. They included candles. I failed to extinguish one. I went for a cup of tea in a little side room, and—and when I got back…” Lucian stuttered to a halt, and licked his dry lips. “The flames were taking hold, but I grabbed the hosepipe and I put it out.
“Although the outbuilding sustained only minor damage, the fire destroyed a lot of expensive stock. The insurers — who weren’t the ones dealing with the wedding fiasco — considered it negligence and refused to pay out. The fire was completely my fault, but the bee thing… Whatever, they all thought I needed time out and in all honesty, I couldn’t disagree.”
“Wow. That’s quite a story. Or stories.”
“I’m afraid I’m a bit of an all-round disaster, and I’m surprised you want to be friends with me.”Let alone anything else. “If you decide I’m too dangerous to be within ten feet of, I’ll understand.”
“They say things come in threes, don’t they? Seems to me you’ve had yours.”
Lucian retrieved a couple more beers from the refrigerator. Arlo hadn’t decided it was best he left, so perhaps he didn’t think he was too much of a liability to be around after all.
“What’s Jake’s Day like?” Lucian asked as he handed over a bottle to Arlo, glad to no longer be talking about the list of sorry events that had brought him to Collier’s Creek. “Bibi had me making displays for the window and putting up banners. I must walk around in a daze, because I hadn’t noticed anything around town about it.”
