Page 14 of Melting His Grumpy Heart
“Well, it’s all a long way from what I do for a living. I’m an illustrator, mostly for kids’ books.”
“And that pays the rent? Ah, sorry, that?—”
“Came out wrong?” Ru cocked a brow, but there was no resentment in his voice or on his face. He smiled, sudden and bright, and it was as though the sun had burst through stormclouds. “It does. I’ve worked hard at building a name and a good reputation. I’m actually in demand and end up having to turn down work because I’m so busy. But I know I’m one of the lucky ones. I’ve just signed the contract for a big commission. I won’t be getting down to it properly until later in January. Decamping to Bobblecombe, however, was going to give me time to start thinking and planning, as well as keeping me at arm’s length from all the distractions back in London…” Ru looked away as a shadow passed over his face.
Jake wanted to ask, itched to ask, about what those distractions were, but no way would he dig for information that wasn’t freely offered.
“What are you working on?” Jake asked instead.
“It’s a series.” Ru’s face lit up. “I pour myself into every job I take, and love every one, but there are some where I find just a little bit more passion, I suppose.” He leant forward, eyes shining.
Jake’s heart fluttered. He got it. That feeling of finding your place in the universe that made you want to give every drop of yourself. The army had been his place, once, until?—
“… believe so hard in this project. It’s vital that kids should learn about the natural world. The publisher wants illustrations that are scientifically accurate but still appealing to children of primary school age.” He smiled ruefully. “It’s harder than it sounds, finding that balance between realism and cuteness.”
“I can imagine,” Jake said, catching up. “Must be challenging to make a badger both accurate and cuddly. They can be vicious bastards.”
“I was hoping to observe some wildlife in Bobblecombe. Books and reference photos only get you so far.”
“There’s a sett in the woods on the edge of the farm though the badgers aren’t massively active in the winter. You’ve more chance of spotting the foxes, once the storm’s passed.”
“Really?” Ru’s face glowed with such genuine enthusiasm that Jake felt an unexpected warmth spread through his chest. “That would be amazing. I’ve seen plenty of urban foxes in London, but they’re not exactly in their natural habitat, scavenging through bins outside kebab shops.”
Jake was no stranger to seeing that himself, when he’d been on leave and out with the lads, all of them with too much beer in their bellies, staking out a rank kebab or burger at the end of the night. He smiled at the bitter-sweet memory.
“No kebabs around here, but plenty of wildlife. Foxes, rabbits, birds of prey.”
“I’d love to see them,” Ru said wistfully. “Maybe I could sketch them from a distance, if you showed me where to look.”
“I could do that when the weather clears a bit.”
What the hell?
As soon as the weather broke Ru would be out and on his way, and he’d be returning to his grey, solitary existence. Jake’s stomach knotted. Wasn’t solitary just another word for lonely? He wanted to grab the offer back, but like the genie emerging from the bottle, it was too late. Ru was gazing at him with undisguised enthusiasm.
“I’ve got trail cameras set up too. I use them to teach tracking. Could show you the footage sometime.”
What. The.Fuck?
“That would be brilliant.” Ru’s smile was so bright it put the sun to shame. “Thank you.”
Jake nodded, and redirected every shred of his focus back to the food. But he could no longer taste a thing as his mind raced. He’d got himself into a mess, and it had been so damn easy. He was supposed to be maintaining distance, not planning woodland excursions. Not making promises that suggested Ru’s stay might extend beyond the absolute minimum.
Yet, as he carried on going through the motions of eating, a tiny voice asked him if it really would be such a bad thing if Ru stayed a little longer?
In the background water hissed from a tap, joined by the clatter of the dishwasher being loaded. Jake looked at the place where his bowl had been and found it gone. He took a deep breath, steadying himself. This was dangerous territory he was entering. The increasingly easy companionship, the growing awareness. He needed to remember Ru was no more than a temporary presence in his life, not someone to connect with, not someone to reveal himself to.
Not someone to want.
Yet as he listened to Ru moving about in the kitchen, Jake found his defences begin to crumble, like the logs slowly turning to embers in the iron wood burner.
CHAPTER TWELVE
Ru woke to the unfamiliar sensation of complete stillness. After a night of howling wind and rattling windows, the sudden quiet was almost disorienting. Dull light filtered through the curtains, casting soft patterns across the bedroom’s wooden floor.
Stretching beneath the warm covers, Ru glanced at his phone on the bedside cabinet. Still no internet signal, but then who was he going to call? His parents lived abroad, and Antonia would be settling into her Christmas cruise, sailing towards the sun and endless cocktails.
Just past eight, it was later than he’d expected; he’d slept better, and longer, than he had in months. Perhaps it was the complete exhaustion from all the tension he’d been living with in London, or maybe the bone-deep quiet that came with being miles from the nearest neighbour. Or maybe it was Jake’s presence, knowing he was in safe and capable hands even if the man was a grade A grump. Ru’s lips twitched. Mostly, but not always. Whatever the cause, he felt more rested than he had since… well, since before everything fell apart.
