Page 20 of She Came Upon A Midnight Clear
“And,” I continue, “the three of us were always hanging out. We kind of did everything together for a whole year. All those times we went out to dinner, or for drinks, or had movie nights at my apartment, I was getting to know you.”
I was falling for her.
“We were getting to know each other. It’s not like this is brand new, just a different brand than the one we had before. And Evie? I have to tell you, this is what I always wanted. Ialways had you in the back of my mind. In the forefront of my mind too often, really. I always thought you were beautiful, and sweet, and… if I’m being honest,madefor me. But like you said, it couldn’t happen at the time. And back then I was still of the mind that I had to give every relationship a fair shake, even though I knew it wasn’t quite right with Marcy almost from the beginning. Then that night at the Christmas party when we kissed? That rocked my whole damn world. But Marcy and I had just broken up, and it felt far too soon. I just didn’t feel right about pursuing anything with you. Hell, you and Marcy were still roommates. It felt impossible. But damn…the first time I met you…I just ached for you. And that ache has never gone away.”
“It’s been the same for me. And now that we’re here together, it’s so much more acute. I’m just trying to wrap my head around it. I don’t mean to sound like a drama queen. Or like one of those lesbians…”
Dru smiles at me. “No, heaven forbid, not one ofthoselesbians. Although I do have a closet full of buffalo plaid flannels.”
That makes me laugh. “Ofcourseyou do.”
“But back to the discussion, because I feel like it’s important that we try to stay on the same page—or at least figure out if we are. I’m willing to admit that having you here with me is still kind of blowing my mind. And it feels even better than I’d imagined. Can we just take it from here? Without questioning it too much?”
“Yes. Please.”
She strokes my cheek, those beautiful eyes gleaming. “I would really like that. And I’d really like for you to stay as long as you can.”
Those thousand butterflies are buzzing around inside me again, and their wings are warm and gentle. I reach up to takeher face in my hands and pull her in to be kissed. And she kisses me hard, hard enough that I can feel the same emotion in her.
I still can barely believe this is real. But it is. She’s right here, her mouth on mine, her arms around me, skin to skin. And right now, I feel like the luckiest girl on earth.
6
Dru
Evie’s been with me for a week. We had to run up to her apartment on the outskirts of Davis at one point so she could grab a few changes of clothes—not that we’ve been clothed all that often.
We visit the kennels every day, where we’ve often run into Gretchen. The two of them exchanged a few silent looks, and Gretchen has shot me a grin or two, and I imagine they’ll have a detailed conversation about what’s happening between us eventually. I wish I had an exact answer for that. All I know is that being with Evie has been incredible, and I’m having feelings I didn’t expect to have so soon, regardless of our history.
Evie has spent some time making her way through my bookshelf while I take care of administrative work. But luckily, I have a great team who handle most of the adoptions, so I’m able to be available to Evie most of the time. Even more this week because we’ve had some pretty heavy rain, making it harder for people to get here. And there’s something about the cozymoodiness of the heavy rain that makes being bundled up with her in my loft even more intimate, more powerful, somehow.
The sex is off the charts amazing, and our connection is maybe even better. Deeper. And I’m sort of dying to tell her exactly how I feel, but I don’t want to scare her off. But every damn thing she does is fucking precious to me. Like right now, with her sitting on the sofa in my gray robe, my old, scarred copy ofEven Cowgirls Get the Bluesin her hands. Her hair is up in a clip, but her bangs hang over her smooth cheek, and she looks so soft and warm to me, focused on her reading while the rain falls outside the windows, and the golden light from the lamp on the table behind her seems to surround her. It makes my chest go tight…
Fuck.
I love her.
It’s fast, except it’s not. We spent so much of that year together, getting to know each other. We already have all of that background stuff, like relationship history, music we love, our coming out stories. I know that she broke her left wrist riding her bike when she was eight years old. That she’s allergic to bees. That she has a not-so-secret love for reality dating shows. That she never knew her father. That her mom died when she was twelve, and she got shuffled off to foster care. And that’s why she hates the holidays and won’t ever let anyone celebrate her birthday, even though she hasn’t ever said so; not that directly.
She has to go back home tomorrow to get ready for work. I know Davis is only an hour, maybe an hour and a half from me, but it feels too far, especially with Christmas being only three days away. I know she’s decided to take off to avoid the holiday; she’s hinted at it, but knowing how she feels about Christmas, I would have gotten it regardless. But I just want to keep her close by me, no matter how unrealistic that may be. I have no holidayplans; I was going to just stay home so I could give most of my staff the day off.
Her phone pings and she glances at it, then sets the book down and scrolls, her brows drawn together.
“What’s up, Evie? Everything okay?”
“Um…it’s from Gretchen. She just saw on the news that upper highway 80 is flooded pretty badly. I don’t know if I’ll be able to get back home for the next couple of days.”
I get up and come over to her, pulling my own phone out of my pocket and searching for more news.
“Yeah, it looks bad. I don’t think any of the alternate routes will be any better, since those roads are all so narrow, and it’s so heavily wooded up there. They’re reporting mudslides on the 505 and the 113.”
She blows out a breath. “I guess I’d better email my boss. I hope she’s not too pissed.”
I slide my hand over her shoulder. “Baby, it’s not your fault. And if the roads are this bad, I doubt you’re the only staff member who can’t get there. The students won’t be coming back until after Christmas, anyway, right?”
“Yeah. It’s just that I said I’d be back tomorrow to take care of some stuff, and now I feel like a bad employee. Even if my boss is kind of an asshole. Actually, he’s a major asshole, which is most of why I don’t love my job.”
I smooth my hand over hers. “Would it be the worst thing on the planet if you were here with me for Christmas?”
