Page 100 of Crown of Thorns
“I never intended to share my past life with anyone.” It’s a heavy confession, one I feel down in my stomach. He shrugs. “But I guess you’re right—” He turns back to face an old building. “Now that we’re here, it feels good to have you by my side. Just know that…I’ve done many things…that are not pretty. And I’m not proud of them.”
I say nothing to that, his words creating a distance I’ll prevent from happening. Squeezing his hand, I won’t let go.
“I want to show you something.” Noah braids his fingers with mine. “This way.”
We leave the main boulevard and enter another charming street lined with ancient buildings and lovely shops. Suddenly, we’re standing in a small park. It looks more like an inner court by its size. It’s cosy, hidden, with only a few trees standing in its middle. The entire green zone is walled.
“Pretty amazing, right?” Noah walks us inside, then stops, looks around as if seeing the place for the first time. “When Ifirst came to Paris, I spent a lot of my time here. It felt safe, you know? The quiet, the stillness… just sitting here in the sunlight, with no one yelling or watching, felt like I could breathe again.” He drags me to the only bench that sits by the trees, then crouches down and brushes his finger over the peeling, moss-green paint. “Yeah. It’s still here. Look.”
Noah lives here
It’s not the letters themselves that make my stomach clench. It’s the aching loneliness behind them, the quiet echo of a boy who carved his existence into wood because no one else saw him. The little star beside his name isn’t just decoration. It’s a constellation of hope, a flicker in the dark that someone might one day look up and see him. I see him now. And I swear, as long as I breathe, that star won’t go unnoticed again. My chest tightens. A fierce, burning protectiveness rises inside me. He’ll never be that alone again. Not on my fucking watch. It’s the meaning that’s carved into eternity. That, and the little star that sits next to it. I bite my lip. I’ve waited for him to open up to me for a while now, though right now, I’m not sure what to say.
“A lonely star. Fuck, that hits me straight in the gut, baby. And you slept here?” I finally managed.
He looks up at me through heavy-lashed eyes. His gaze is turbulent. “Yeah. Security found me after two weeks. They wanted me gone at night, but I paid them off. I managed to stay for a few more months before the new guys arrived. I didn’t have any money left.” He gets up and wipes his hands clean, then takes his coffee back out of my hand. “It didn’t stop me from staying here during the day.”
“And during nighttime?”
“At first, anything I could get. There are places where you can sign up for the night, but having a roof and a bed doesn’t make it safer. Minors get priority. I was often lucky. I’d wander aroundhere, then in the evening, usually as late as possible, I’d make my way to the shelter. Later, I managed to rent a shared bedroom.”
“A shared bedroom. Doesn’t that sound ominous?” I half-tease. Damn it, I want him to fill the gaps, tell me what the fuck he means. Of course, he doesn't.
I don’t miss the coins he leaves with every young beggar who doesn’t look like a junkie.
“Do you want me to buy him a house?” I ask when I catch him staring at a young man sitting on a blanket.
Noah snorts. “Don’t be ridiculous.”
“Try me. I’d buy him the moon if it made you smile.”
“Stop. You’ve got no idea what you’re talking about.”
“Oh, because I’m just a dumb rich kid?”
“Louis…”
“Don’t tell me that’s how you see me.”
“I don’t. But don’t behave like one.”
My nostrils flare. I behave the way I fucking want to behave. Even if his words sting a little, I’m not about to let him see it. He’s not wrong but fuck him for being right.
Noah pushes up our joined hands and brushes a kiss on every one of my fingers. The tenderness of it undoes me. Each kiss feels like a quiet promise, one I didn’t know I needed. I wonder if this is how trust begins again, not with declarations, but with simple, reverent touch. A kiss for each regret, each step forward. And I let it happen. I let him pull me back into hope. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to upset you.”
Now I’m melting. Fuck, if he continues like this, I’ll disappear in a puddle. “Anyway, I’m hungry.”
“Me too.” He smiles against my knuckles. When he looks up, all chaotic and sexy, my dick pulses in my pants. It wants to salute him in all its full glory, preferably with his lips stretched around it, sucking and kissing and nipping and…oh, fucking fuck. Stay focused.
“Not that kind of hunger,” I grumble.
He raises an eyebrow. “No?”
“I mean, that too. But I first want food.”
“Food, it is.”
But his tongue darts out and he licks at my ink like it’s chocolate. My knees wobble. I’m throwing out all my plans for today. Lunch in the Eiffel Tower, all the fucking way up with view over the entire city. Not now. We’ll make it a fancy dinner. Right now, I want take-in and Noah’s dick buried deep in my ass. The thought is overwhelming. My desire throbs.
