Page 5 of Pumpkin
Petra
What the hell did I just say?The words fall from my lips, shocking my ears as my body shakes from absolute need. Torture is the best word I can think of to describe this nearness to him. Complete and utter torture.
We say nothing for what feels like minutes but is probably only seconds. Milliseconds, even. But it’s enough time for an understanding to develop between us. I always thought he avoided me because he had no interest in me, but after forcing myself to interact with him just now, I don’t think that’s the case. I know the gaze of an uninterested man by heart. And this is the exact opposite. Could it be possible that Finlay Ross wants me? Me? His little sister’s awkward best friend?
I’ve never had a man look at me this way before.
“Youwantme to hurt you?” His eyes search my face and my breathing shallows.
Closing my eyes for a second, I swallow hard and nod.Now or never, Petra.“In a good way,” I whisper, wanting to hide under a rock the moment the words are out there. You can’t take this kind of admission back.
He searches my eyes, and I’m not sure if he’s interested or about to laugh at me. I suppose the best way to explain his expression is perplexed.
“He’s insane!” Claire complains, her voice filling the air and jolting us both back to reality. Suddenly I feel very foolish.
Fin clears his throat and turns toward her, giving me a moment of reprieve where I’m able to get my breath back. “Who’s insane?”
“Dave. I need to go over there.”
“Because?”
“He wants her to meet his parents,” I offer, finding my voice.
Fin looks over his shoulder at me, his expression so normal, I wonder if maybe I imagined that whole exchange. “Why doesn’t she want to meet his parents?” he asks before turning back to Claire. “Why don’t you want to meet his parents?”
“Because.” She shrugs. “I’m not ready.”
Fin reaches out and places a big hand on his sister’s shoulder. “Then don’t. Your life. You decide.”
She lets out a sigh. “I know. But I need to go out and talk to him face to face. He thinks I don’t want to be with him anymore, and I do. I just…”
“Don’t want to meet his parents?” Fin finishes for her.
“Yeah. But I need to go to his place and talk to him. I’ll be as quick as I can.”
“Don’t take long,” Fin says. “The storm is due to hit by nightfall.”
“I’ll hurry. It’ll be coffee and a conversation then home. Will you guys be OK without me?” She mainly aims that question at me.
I nod, incapable of speaking through my humiliation.I want you to hurt me in a good way?Kill me now.
“Petra and I will be just fine,” Fin says.
“OK. Play nice.” She gives Fin’s giant bicep a squeeze and moves toward me.“You’ll be OK, right?” She pulls her coat from the hook and looks at me with raised brows. I nod then she leans in and lowers her voice so only I can hear. “He acts tough and scary, but he’s a pussycat beneath it all.” She gives me a wink. “I’ll be fast as I can.” Then she’s out the door and I can’t breathe. I’m all alone with Fin.
“We should get to the store,” he says, his voice devoid of feeling as he avoids eye contact and pulls open the door.
My stomach drops.
Maybe I did imagine it all?
