Page 14 of Mine for the Holidays
“Sleeping.”
“Then I guess that answers your question too.”
He grins in a way that reminds me of a snake as he takes a bite and chews rather rambunctiously, keeping his eyes on me like somehow there’s a mystery to be solved here. “You in a fight?”
“Why would we be in a fight?” I ask, focusing on the crumbs that have fallen on my plate so I don't need to meet his eyes and have him see the lies in mine. I'm just stressed enough that I might blurt it all out, confessing to the worst possible person in the family.
Tony and Tommy are like two sides of the same coin. One side is truth, and the other side is dare. Tommy, of course, is truth. If I ever have a problem or need an understanding ear, he's the one I would go to. Tony, on the other hand, is dare. He thrives on stirring the pot. One time when I was a senior in high school, I snuck out to a concert with my friends, and he caught me sneaking back inside. He swore black and blue that he wouldn't say a word, and in a way he didn’t, but he did make sure my parents found my ticket stub so I was found out anyway. I don’t think I’ve ever really forgiven him for that. I got grounded for a month and missed out on my senior trip to the snowfields, all because I trusted the wrong person. No wonder I have issues with men.
“Good morning, sweet girl,” Dad says as he enters the dining room. He’s wearing a pair of tailored pants and a button-up shirt like he always does. There’s no room for casualness with my dad. He believes that every day matters as much as the one before, so you should look the part. I don’t think the man owns a single pair of sweats, and any T-shirt in his drawer is of the undershirt variety, never to be worn in front of company. “Good morning, son.” He takes a seat at his usual spot and collects fruit and a croissant from the serving dishes in front of us. “I trust you both slept well.”
“Like a log,” Tony says, patting his stomach as he pushes back from the table. “Do you know where Aunty Joan and Mom are? I want to say goodbye and thank Aunty for her generosity before we hit the road.”
“Outside. Joan wanted to walk before she sat down to breakfast. They’ll be back soon.”
“Might try and catch them then.”
“I thought the kids were still asleep,” I say, narrowing my eyes slightly.
“Sleeping, packing. Same thing.” Tony gives me a wink as he tugs his pants up over his middle-aged paunch and heads out. Mom says it’s the sign of a happy man, so I wonder what that says about Tommy who’s still as slim as he ever was. Is henothappy just because he didn’t put on weight? And what about me? I’ve always been big. Am I to be perpetually jolly?
“And what about your fellow?” Dad asks, turning to me and cutting into my fat versus happy internal debate. “Where is he off to this morning?”
“Oh, he’s still—”
“I’m right here,” Nate says, coming up behind me like a panther in the night. He smells like a fresh shower and soap as he presses a kiss to the side of my head. “Good morning, darling.” He smiles at me and takes his seat. But the smile doesn’t touch his eyes the way it did yesterday. And the way he moves is just…stiff.Oh…I dare say I just learned the difference between Nate acting like he cares andactuallycaring. Today he’s acting. Before…he wasn’t.I miss him already.
As Nate and Dad make small talk about the weather and football, I choke down the rest of my muffin, barely tasting it as I try to figure out how one apologizes for calling an actor the wrong name during sex. I mean, it’s not like Hallmark has a range for that, do they? So, I’m going to have to get creative here. Luckily, we have a whole ten-day cruise to try and figure it out.
Nate
“I…I want to apologize for last night,” Delaney starts when I pull up outside her apartment building. The car is still running, and the air between us is tense. We’ve barely spoken a word the entire journey back. It’s not that I don’t want to talk to her. It’s just that I’m trying to wrap my head around what I want and how I’m supposed to make that happen. But no matter what way I look at this, one of us loses. Either I spend my life pretending to be a dentist called Liam, or Delaney comes clean with her family. And I just don’t see a world where either of those scenarios works—not to mention the fact that she’s shown no real,tangiblefeelings toward me, Nate, during these past thirty hours. So, I’d really rather not speak at all unless I’m in the process of playing the part I was hired to play.
“You don’t need to,” I say, my hands gripping the steering wheel as I keep my eyes straight forward. “I understand why it happened. You don’t need to explain.” That’s my biggest problem. If she truly thought what happened between us last night was part of the show, there’s no way she shares the same kind of feelings toward me that I do toward her. And I have no right to be upset over it. I came into this knowing it was a business transaction. Hell, I have a folder full of information telling me it was one. I shouldn't be shocked that a brilliant, successful woman would prefer to pretend with me instead of build something real. At the end of the day, I’m no catch. I’m a man living in his friend’s guestroom because I failed at my dream and I have absolutely nothing to show for it. What could she ever want with me? I’m a failure who can act. She’s an entrepreneur who stands on her own two feet.One of these things does not look like the other…
“I feel like I do need to explain,” she says, biting her bottom lip nervously. “You seem angry, and it wasn’t my intention to upset you. Just want to say that I’m sorry and I’ll understand if you just want to call it quits from here. I’ll tell them we broke up and I’ll pay Aunty Joan back for the ticket. It’s fine.”And that’s me dumped.At least now I know where I stand.
“Our agreement was Thanksgiving and a ten-day cruise,” I say, forcing myself to look at her and keep my voice even. “I’m a professional, Delaney. You’ve paid for a devoted boyfriend, and a devoted boyfriend is what you’ll get.”
“I see. Then I suppose I’ll see you on the sixteenth for the cruise?”
“What happened to meeting up to work on our relationship story between now and then?”
“I’ll send you any notes I make,” she says, pulling open the door. “Like you said, you’re a professional. You don’t need me to micromanage you.”
“For what it’s worth, Delaney,” I say, causing her to pause before she slams the door shut again. “I enjoyed being your boyfriend yesterday.”
Indecision crosses her features as she holds my gaze for a beat. “I enjoyed it too,” she returns, her chin lifting as something resembling pride takes hold. “And I apologize again for misunderstanding your intentions. It won’t happen again.” With a curt nod, she closes the door and makes a beeline for her building’s entrance. I sit in the car until I can’t see her anymore, wondering at what point in the last thirty hours I managed to fall in love with her.This is going to get messy.
Delaney
“Why don’t you just tell me what happened,” Liz says as she bites the end off a candy cane and stares up at me with those doe eyes of hers. “You’ve been in a bad mood ever since you got back from Thanksgiving and frankly, ‘tis the season to be jolly, and you’re bumming me out.” She gives me a pointed look from where she sits at my dining table with her feet stretched across two chairs.
“I told you. It’s embarrassing,” I mutter, holding my bright floral bathing suit up and stretching it across my body, wondering if it’s still going to fit—I’ve gained a few pounds in recent weeks from stress eating. I’ve been in denial for days, but now that I’m packing for the cruise, I’m rethinking asking for extra whipped cream on my mint-flavored mocha each morning, as well as the half-pint of ice cream I ate most days. Ugh. Why does food have to make you feel good when you feel crappy then hang around like a bad memory on your hips? It’s unfair.
“As embarrassing as that time your bra broke, and your boob fell out of your dress on New Years?”
I scrunch my bathers up and toss them into my suitcase where it sits open on the table. “Worse.”
