Page 31 of Wrong Car, Wright Guy
“And why am I choosing a model?” Her tone switches from annoyed to mildly curious. “Can’t get a date so you’re paying someone?”
“I don’t payanyonein that respect, Miss Casey. You’re doing a photo shoot to promote the show and we need someone to stand in as me.”
“Because?”
“I don’t need to explain myself. Just do what I’m asking. Or better yet, getyourPA to do it. I trust you don’t fight with her the way you fight with me.”
“She doesn’t piss me off the way you do,” she says with a smirk, and I almost smile.
“Just choose whoever you think is suitable and run it past Gerry.”
“Well, if it’s someone standing in for you, I’m thinking getting a model is overkill. The homeless guy on 73rdwill do nicely.”
I laugh. I can’t help it. It erupts out of my chest without warning, as unexpected as Ruby Casey entering my life was. No matter how often or how hard we fight, there’s just something about her that gets under my skin and makes me forget myself. “Offer him a shower and five hundred bucks. You’ll make his year.”
“He has no teeth. Does that matter?”
“Get out of my office, Ruby.” I’m smiling but fighting it now.
“He may also be missing an eye.”
“I don’t care. Choose whoever you want.”
“And he has this floofy hair that sticks out like a mad scientist. Except he’s mostly bald, so it’s more like a lightning strike victim.”
“Goodbye, Miss Casey.”
With a chuckle, she turns and walks out, leaving my door wide open because she knows I hate it and does it on purpose.
I shake my head and try not to laugh. No matter what I throw at that woman, she always seems to get the last shot in. I'm endlessly impressed. And perpetually wanting. Ruby Casey is my kryptonite, there’s no doubt about that. I want to be strong, quit feeling the way I do about her. But every time she’s around me, I’m weak.
I wonder if she has any idea how much power she truly has over me?
Fourteen
Ruby
“Ithink it’s agreatidea,” I say to Theo, standing in front of him at the gym while he does bicep curls and looks at me like I've gone mad.
“I don’t want my face on the side of a bus.” Brilliance struck me at the start of my lunch hour, and I couldn't wait to find Theo and tell him. Since I was given the power to decide who features in the ad campaign with me, I decided thathecan be the stand-in for Tanner. So far, he’s not as keen for it as I hoped.
“You'll have your back to the camera, and it will make me—the person whodoeshave to have their face on the side of a bus—feel more comfortable. Please, little bro.” I clasp my hands in front of me. “I’ll pay you a thousand dollars. You know you need the cash, so it’s win-win. Maybe even win-win-win because then you’ll have enough money to move out of my apartment.” I lift my brows up and down, trying to make this as appealing as possible. Ever since the bedbug incident, I let Darren and Theo sublet my apartment and moved in with Tahlia because Darren didn’t want to go home, too afraid that all of his Coco costumes would be ruined by another infestation. Things are cramped. Very cramped. I love my brother, but I also love my own space, and three months sleeping on the pullout couch at Tahlia’s is pushing the limits of that love.
“Interesting how the amount this job pays isexactlywhat we’re short in our moving fund,” Theo points out.
“It’s kismet!” I hold my hands out to emphasize the point.
“Don’t you think it’s hypocritical for an openly gay man to stand in for a man who claims Ichosemy sexual orientation?”
“He didn’t actually say that specifically,” I respond, wincing internally for defending my boorish co-host. Most days, I like to pretend I hate him—pretendbeing the operative word since that man is actuallyreallyhard to despise.
As much as I’m glad I told Tanner how his flirting affected me, I can’t say I’m not hurt by the fact it ceased to exist the very next day. No girl wants to learn that the guy she’s crushing on has no intention of following through. So, it was disheartening for me to be anywhere near him for a while. But once the show got off the ground and we’ve gotten into the swing of things, I feel like we found a new groove. A professional groove. One where we can clash on air and sometimes have a laugh outside of the studio—something I have to do to lighten the man up every now and then since he’s always so serious and growly.
Tanner needs a little levity in his work life, and well, I get to be typecast as the ‘awkward sidekick’ who makes the hot guy’s life better in a motherly sort of way, waving him off happily as he goes on ‘dates with his redhead’ twice a week. It’s just like in the movies. Except in the movies, they don’t show us that platonic sidekick at home, going to bed alone night after night, on a pull-out couch no less. They just show them filling a functional role in the hero’s life before his inevitable happily ever after. If we’re lucky—and the audience is invested enough in our quirkiness—we get a five second camera pan showing us turning to the awkward person sitting next to us at the hero’s wedding—that we probably organized, mind you—and realizing that that equally awkward person is the one who’s meant for us.How fucking lovely.
“Hello?” Theo is clicking his fingers in front of my face, bringing me back to the gym and the conversation we were having.
“What?”
