Page 150 of Almost Ours
It described his injuries in detail: a shattered vertebra, permanent spinal cord damage, life forever changed.
The writer of the article hadn’t pulled any punches, going on to talk about how Ryan had been suspended and vilified in the media, how fans had turned on him overnight.
I dropped my phone onto the counter like it had burned me, pressing a hand to my chest to try to calm the wild beating of my heart.
My head spun. The Ryan I knew was kind, protective, gentle–especially with Connor. But this… this was violent. Reckless. Dangerous.
Why hadn’t he told me?
The room felt like it was closing in around me, the air thick and suffocating. I gripped the edge of the counter to steady myself, staring at the phone like it might explode.
I couldn’t shake the image the articles painted of him–a man charging across the ice, fuelled by anger and adrenaline, leaving devastation in his wake. Was that really who Ryan was deep down? Had I been blinded by the version of him I wanted to see?
He’d held me when I was bleeding out, his hands trembling as he begged me to stay awake. He was the one who’d made Connor laugh when I couldn’t, who paced the boards like a nervous dad at every game.
Now though? A shadow loomed over those memories.
I didn’t know how to reconcile the man I loved with the one described in those articles.
The sound of laughter from outside snapped me out of my spiraling thoughts, but my knees felt weak, my chest tight. I pressed my palm to my forehead, trying to steady my breath.
Why hadn’t he told me? Why did I have to find out like this?
Was there more he was hiding?
The firelight still flickered outside as I stepped back into the circle, clutching the tray of marshmallows like it was a lifeline. Everyone was laughing about something Shane had said, but their voices felt distant, like I was underwater.
I tried to sit down and act normal, forcing a smile when Nina nudged me, but my head was spinning. My hands were clammy, and I kept clenching and unclenching them in my lap, trying to shake the images from the articles out of my mind.
Ryan was pacing near the fire, throwing in the occasional joke or comment, his easy grin lighting up his face. He looked so… normal. Still, all I could think about was the man described in those articles.
Aggressive. Dangerous.
Was he really that person?
“Hey, you okay?” Ryan asked suddenly, his eyes flicking to mine. He tilted his head, studying me with concern.
I quickly nodded, my voice catching in my throat. “Yeah, just tired.”
He frowned slightly but didn’t push. Shane said something else, pulling Ryan’s attention, and I exhaled shakily, grateful for the distraction.
I barely registered the rest of the evening. Shane was the first to leave, clapping Ryan on the back and giving me a quick hug before heading out. Nina and Liam followed not long after, with Connor bouncing excitedly at the idea of a sleepover.
“Bye, Mom!” Connor shouted as he ran out the door with Liam, his backpack swinging wildly behind him.
“Have fun!” I called back, my voice strained.
When the door clicked shut behind them, the house fell silent.
Ryan turned to me with a warm smile, brushing his hands on his jeans. “Well, that was fun.”
I forced a smile and nodded, moving toward the kitchen to start cleaning up. My heart was racing, every nerve in my body on edge. My thoughts were a chaotic mess, colliding into each other.
Why didn’t he tell me? Did he think I couldn’t handle it? Or worse, was he still that person deep down, hiding it behind this caring, protective facade?
Ryan came up behind me, reaching for the dishes in the sink. “I’ll dry,” he offered, bumping my good shoulder playfully.
My shoulders stiffened, but I didn’t respond. Just handed him a plate, the tension in the air thick between us. How was I even supposed to bring this up? The thought of voicing my fears made my chest tighten, like there wasn’t enough air in the room.
