Page 32 of Ashfall
“When are you meeting?'' Noc asks him, Volokov’s eyes glide over to me, his gaze rolling up and down and it makes the hairs prickle on my neck. It’s on the tip of my tongue to tell him to fuck off. “Now, now Noc. You know me better than that. You've anAshfallofficer sitting beside you, how can I trust that this isn't a set up?'' How the hell does he know our unit's name? It’s on the tip of my tongue to ask what the hell Graves has told him, but Noc gets in first, “You have my word, when have I ever gone back on it?''
Volokov dips his head and nods. ''Yes, you have stuck to your word all these years, my boy. But it’s not enough.”
He leans forward and Noc edges slightly closer to me, as if he's anticipating him pouncing at me. Volokov is quiet for a beat, going over his options, and finally deciding on one. “Tell you what. You meet me before we head to our meeting spot. She comes with us. As leverage of course.”
My heart lurches from my chest. “Absolutely not.” Noc shoots to his feet.Oh shit, this is going to go south. If I don’t speak up, we're either never going to get out of this building or we’ll lose our only shot at Graves. Steading myself, I speak over Noc before he opens his mouth again and messes this up. “Fine.” Noc’s wide eyes shoot to me, his teeth clenched so hard I’m surprised he hasn’t broken any.
Volokov rises to his feet and clasps his hands together. “Excellent.” Smiling like the cat that’s got the cream.What have I done?“I'll get the address. I’m planning to meet with him in four days. I’ll contact you on the day where to meet us. Brodie will travel the rest of the way with us. You and whoever else youhave running around with you can get in and exterminate the rat.” He stuffs his hands in his pockets, idly walking towards the windows looming over his club. “But Noc? If any one of those operators come for me or take one step out of line... then she's dead, worse than dead. Remember what I told you.” He turns back to stare at him, his face void of an expression, it’s cold and unsettling. “I’ll drop her somewhere for you to collect.”
Noc stills as he looks at me, his eyes are trying to communicate a wordless plea to change my mind, but we can't. I subtly shake my head, and he turns to Volokov, who’s now grinning as he takes his hand to clasp it, putting his other hand on top of it to seal my fate. “I taught you well, my boy.” His slimy face gives me one last look, and his words send a shudder through me. “She must be worth it.” Volokov strides into what I can only assume is his office, leaving Noc and I alone. Noc's glare has now shifted towards a threat of strangling me. I mouth 'what' to him, which seems to snap whatever restraint he had left. He’s at me with only a couple of strides before he stops, a shriek bouncing off the walls that makes me cringe at the high octave it holds.
“Nocturne!”Oh yay, it's Natalia. This day can’t get any worse. She runs to Noc, tugging him around so she can leap up to wrap her arms around his neck. I feel like a wolverine as my invisible claws retract from my hands, watching her dirty little paws all over him. She doesn't take a blind bit of notice to me as she tries to kiss him, but he turns his head as he lowers her to the ground. I spy the skin-colored plaster on her cheek, along with the faint yellow bruising around it. And I also don’t miss the bandage poking out from the sleeve of her dress.
“You need to be careful with your arm, Natalia.” His voice is low and wary, as if excusing why he lowered her gently to the ground. She pouts before her lips form an O, finally realizing they aren’t alone. The look she draws catapults hackles alongmy back. “Who the fuck is that?” She asks, folding her arms and popping out her hip, her eyes narrowing but it looks like more to do with the pain she's caused herself trying to flare some attitude.
Noc looks at me with pleading eyes to play along,oh I'll play along big guy. “This is Brodie, she's helping me on a job with your brother.” He says to her. She nods, eyes rolling up and down as she takes in my attire. I’ve killed men for less. “Where the hell did you find her?”
Obviously, she thinks I'm going to be offended by the catty comment on my clothing choice, as if I'm shallow enough that it would hurt my feelings. “Lev and I go way, way back.” I purr, folding my arms, a malicious smile coursing my lips as her brows dip at the name only I use. The deviousness is coursing through my veins when I speak, “What happened to your shoulder?”
Noc looks like he’s a second away from a heart attack, his eyes widen at me, but I ignore him - I’m actually enjoying this part now. She glances at her shoulder, lips puckering to a pout as she looks up at Noc before returning to me, “Some stupid psycho bitch came in here and shot me. I got her back though.” She bites her lip as she goes back to staring at Noc, who's face is void of all emotion, watching me like a hawk. He's about to learn just how dirty I like to fight.
I laugh at her exaggeration, and the fact she doesn’t seem to recognize me - I push a little further. “See she got your face too, hope that didn't cost you too much.” Her head snaps to me as her hand ghosts over the bandage. She’s furious, face catching up with the deep color of her blusher.
Her brows deepen, and I cock my head, wondering if the light inside her empty head has finally had a new bulb fitted. But Volokov waltzing in to hand Noc a piece of paper instantly shuts her down. She edges away from Noc to put distance between them.Interesting. “Here. I'll be seeing you both then.” He holdsthe paper tight when Noc fingers curl around it, his words a thousand threats. “Don't fuck with me.” Noc levels his gaze and tugs it out of his hand, and Volokov smiles up at him as he taps the side of his face. His phone rings, breaking the tension as Volokov strolls away, his Russian words fade the further he goes.
Noc angles his head to signal our departure. I walk in front of him, now aware that Natalie is following to stop Noc. “When will you be back, I miss you,” she purrs. I have no doubt she's speaking English today for my benefit to hear what she's saying.
“Soon, I'll call you.” He gives her a quick peck on the cheek as he walks forward to me where I hold the door open for him. I’m fighting back the temptation to swing it into his face on approach. She's staring at me with a smirk, and I just can’t fucking help myself today. “Thanks for looking after him for me while I was gone. He's a great fuck, isn't he?” Her face drops, eyes widening as she now turns the same shade of red as her heels. I throw a wink over my shoulder as a parting gift before I let the door slam shut.
Nocs standing in the middle of the stairs, fingers splaying across his forehead as if he has a headache. “You just had to, didn't you?” I don’t even answer him as I march by, ensuring my hair whips his face to make a point. He's calling my name behind me as I storm down, struggling to keep his voice hushed but also get my attention. I don't like this jealousy shit, especially mixed with the unwanted discomfort that rose as I watched him so seamlessly slip into his double life. I reach the gate, where the same guard from earlier stands along with a new addition.
I'm marching so fast that Noc’s now a few paces behind me. When the new guard steps in front of me, eyes me up and down, and says something I can't understand, and can tell it would piss me off if I could. I don't even think; my hand drives into his throat, my other hand cuffing around his neck to pull him back. My knee jerks up to ram into his balls, the force so hard I’velikely dented any and all of his contained sperm. “Brodie!” Noc’s deep growl fills my ears as he tugs my arm behind me and gets in my face.
My voice is lethally calm compared to the jet stream of hot air rising inside me. “You have two seconds to let go of my arm or I'll break your windpipe next.” My shoulders rise and fall with how heavy I’m breathing. I’m pulled away from my stare off with Noc as the other guy whistles then laughs as he opens the gate, “I told him not to bother.”
I yank my arm free and step over the wheezing guard, my walk imitating thunder into the street as I head towards the cruiser. “On our way” I say, Blitz answers immediately. “Keeping a look out. Keep the fight outside the car please.” I cringe, realizing they heard every word of what's gone on in the past thirty minutes.Great. I yank the earbud from my ear and shove it into my pocket, not wanting them to hear the next argument as Noc catches up. I’ve tunnel vision through the side street before I need to turn to get the vehicle, but I’m yanked by my hood and thrown against a wall. Normally my senses would heighten to get on the defense, but I know exactly who is responsible for it. He stalks up to me, a murderous look in his expression, both arms widen to position at either side of my head and cage me in. I feel like an animal caught in a trap.
“Are you finished with your tantrum, Malyshka?” Fuck him and his words, I know he's calling me that to soothe me over. I’m not having it.
“Are you back to being the real you? Or was who I saw up the stairs the person you've turned into.” It's a low blow, but I can't help it. I get we all have switches to flick in times of need, masks to wear in the presence of others. But seeing him so smoothly execute his, with a well-known terrorist who is a threat to each and every one of us, it unsettles me how he didn't show a flickerof disdain when he spoke with him. I catch his flinch, as if my words physically punched him.
His jaw grinds as he looks me over. “I've had years of practice. When you’re under the watchful eye of the world's most wanted man, you can't afford any missteps in your performance.”
The anger still simmers on my surface, I don't have anything good enough to respond to him with, so I knock his arms out to the side with force and march off again, but he's quicker. His hand shoots out and grips my neck, slowly walking me back to the wall, and resumes his prior stance of caging me in close. “What’s this really about Brodie?” It’s my turn to grind a jaw, I can feel myself teetering on the edge, just another step and I'll free fall into oblivion.
“I didn't even recognize you back there Noc, With Volokov, Natalia, hell even the guys out front. It was like you'd all been chums since day one. How easily the interactions flowed from you. Kissing Natalia’s cheek? It makes... '' I bite my tongue, clamping my words inside, but his lethal look warns me otherwise. “It makes it hard to trust you.” It comes out a whisper, one I instantly regret voicing. I know I should trust him, but watching him back there, it cast doubts in my mind. There's been too much betrayal between us that the cracks have barely welded.
He takes a step back from me, his arms dropping limply to the side. I read the hurt that fills the creases around his eyes. “Even after everything I've told you,shownyou, you still don't fucking trust me.” he takes another step, creating a distance between us, pushing his hair back as his hand thrusts through it in defeat. “I get it, trust is earned and needs to be rebuilt. But if you think for one second that anything back there was genuine, you don't fucking know me as well as I thought you did, Brodie. Everything I've done out here was to protect you. When he cameto me and offered to clear my name, I was tempted, sure. But I couldn't trust he'd go through with it. As soon as he mentioned your name and those sick fucks had planned - I didn't care about the rest of the details. I'd deliver that fucking weapon myself and set it off by my own hand if it meant you were safe.”
The spasm in my heart is overwhelming, and I feel the urge to run a hand over my chest to soothe the ache. He doesn't give me a chance to speak. “I've done some really fucked up shit, Brodie. Things I'll likely never share with you, so you don't have to be burdened with it. Whatever Volokov asked. I did. I knew the deeper I got, the less likely I would be to ever clear my name. I was never getting out of this for the parts I’ve played for him. But he was my only access to Graves. So, I'll let him string me along until I can get rid of him. One less person in this world I need to worry about getting their hands on you. Once I've got him, I’m coming for Volokov. I'll die with a smile on my face knowing I did what she asked and kept you safe, no matter the cost. I've had to fight with myself every single fucking day doing his dirty work, knowing he even dared lay a finger on you. Whenever I look at him, I imagine every single way that man could take his last breath, and that’s the only thing that allows me to look into his eyes so easily.”
I don’t even realize I’m crying until the tear rolls down my cheek and hits my hand. The pang of guilt consuming me for distrusting him, and the recognition for what he's had to endure all these years, just to keep me from harm. I feel like an idiot for voicing it in the manner I did, caught up in the moment instead of letting myself simmer and reason with my head. “Noc, I’m -” I reach my hand out to take his arm, but he moves away from my touch. My chest feels like it caves in on itself as I stare at his face, like he's fighting back the emotions. I've hurt him, and panic claws its way through me at how I can make it right. “Car’s waiting, let’s go.” He says with a gesture of his arm for me towalk ahead. My feet are rooted in place - I can’t go until I make this right.
But I won’t be able to rectify this so quickly, this one’s going to take time. I reluctantly move my feet as we walk back to the car in silence. Adam and Blitz are seated in the front, Phantom in the back, who leans over to open the door for me as I slide inside. Noc pulls the seat down and sits in the back, pulling it shut with excess force.I've really fucked up. I face straight ahead to see Blitz and Adam both turn through the gap. I close my eyes when I speak, “Just drive.” But I don't miss Blitz whispering, “Mom and Dad are still fighting.”
CHAPTER TWENTY-FOUR
nyx
