Page 48 of ILY
“We are.” I don’t explain because I’m out of breath walking him up the stairs, but when I make it into the bedroom and he sees the food on the tray, he gasps. He slides from my arms, but instead of heading to the bed, he turns and grips me by the side of the neck, kissing the breath straight from my lungs.
I hold on to him, licking into his warm mouth, tasting him. And when we finally part, our lips linger against each other, and he murmurs something against mine.
I can’t make out the words, but when his hand comes up between us, fingers touching his chin, I realize he’s saying, ‘Thank you.’
My lips curl up, and I gesture for him to get comfortable.
As Leaf settles in bed, he quirks a brow and waves his hand at me to get my attention. “I have sweats you can borrow since it’s never fun to lounge around in jeans,” he says, gesturing toward the dresser.
I open the drawer and grab what he’s offering. It’ll be nice to get out of these clothes. Glancing to the left, I see the bathroom and head over, stopping when he bursts into laughter.
“What?” I’m a little self-conscious, I think, though his laughter doesn’t sound cruel.
Rolling his eyes, he leans toward me. “You don’t have anything I haven’t seen before. You can change right here.”
That’s not entirely true. He hasn’t seen my ass. Or the gun I keep back there in the holster. I feel slightly panicked that he’s going to call me out, but I don’t think it shows on my face. “I’m going to use the bathroom. I’ll be right out. Dig in.”
I don’t wait for him to agree. I just head through the bathroom door, closing it behind me.
This is all starting to feel like it’s a lot. Hiding myself is no problem. I’ve spent months undercover. But something about him makes me want to spill every single hidden truth. It’s dangerous, these feelings, but the spell this man has on me is wild. Uncontrollable.
Feral.
I take in a trembling breath and glance at myself before shimmying out of my jeans. I look almost as tired as Leaf does. It’s part of the job, but something about this one feels…heavier.
The holster comes off next, and I check my gun quickly before wrapping it up in the denim fabric, hoping he doesn’t try to rummage in my pockets for anything in the middle of the night.
The sweats don’t fit as well as my own, but they’re comfortable enough, so I quickly use the bathroom, wash my hands, then bring my dangerous ball of clothes with me back to the bedroom.
Leaf has moved himself to the far side of the bed, leaving the side by the door open for me. He can’t possibly know, but the fact that it was instinctual to give me that spot…it feels like it means something.
“Are you hungry?” he asks.
I am, but not exactly for food. I don’t want to ask him for more though. He still looks exhausted, and I can’t imagine his arms feel like doing any more working out after all that digging.
“I’m alright.”
He pulls the blanket back, and I glance over to make sure he’s eaten enough before setting the jeans down on the floor beside me. I take off my hearing aids next, letting them drop to the nightstand. In the dull quiet of his bedroom, I’m missing the sounds of his breathing—those small, subtle noises that will always be lost to me. But I can hear him shift—the way he pats the bed, waiting for me, and the way he laughs when I roll my eyes again.
I give him a long, careful look before sliding in between the sheets and resting against the pillows he’s very obviously fluffed up while he was waiting for me to be done.
His body immediately curls into mine, and his chin tips up so he can look at me.
“Hello,” I murmur.
He grins, his eyes crinkled in the corners. “Is it weird that I’m so into you?”
“Why would it be weird?”
“Well, you’re a stalker for one,” he says, ticking the answer off on his finger. “Two, you’re an arms dealer for the dark web?—”
“I’m not an arms dealer for anything,” I tell him. I can’t give him the exact truth, but I can kill at least one of the lies. “I just happen to know people who can procure things.”
He goes quiet. “Why’d you answer my request, then?”
“Because I wanted to see what kind of man you were after hearing about Michael.”
Leaf’s eyes close, and he grows tense, falling back against the headboard, his breathing a little shallow. Fuck, could this be the moment I’ve been waiting for? “Fucking Michael,” he whispers, and I read the words off his lips.
