Page 88 of Between Never and Forever
“I haven’t seen her in over a month.”
I give her a single nod. I’m aware of how long it’s been.
“She’s only seven,” my mother snaps. “She’s a child. You give her too much say in the day to day. She shouldn’t be dictating when or how often she sees her grandmother.”
I drum my fingers on my thigh. Turn my head from side to side to try and relieve some of the tension that’s building.
“She has her own mind,” I state. “I won’t make decisions for her.”
“She’s a child—"
“She’s aperson,” I cut her off.“If Brynnlee isn’t comfortable around you, I will not force her to be around you. You’re my mother, but that doesn’t entitle you to anything.”
I hold her gaze as she blinks furiously. She huffs a few more times, then stomps to the coffee pot. She takes out two new mugs and fills them in the silence. When she brings the mugs to the table and sees the other two mugs she’d already brought out, she huffs yet again. She sets the full coffee mugs down, then snatches up the empty ones and takes them back to the kitchen.
“Do you need any help with cleaning out Dad’s office?” I ask, trying to change the subject. She waves her hand in my direction but doesn’t look at me.
“No. It’s just a bunch of files and paperwork. Sermons. Counseling notes. A lot of shredding.”
She doesn’t say more. She won’t be redirected—her mind is still firmly on Brynn. On my daughter and how I choose to raise her. The oddest thing about it is how I know my mother doesn’t want a relationship with Brynn. She just wants something to control. She can’t control me anymore. She can’t control my father. She’s alone and bored.
I grab my coffee and take a drink, watching silently.
Some people might think I’m being harsh, or that I’m wrong in letting Brynn decide not to see my mother. That’s fine. Other people aren’t raising her. I am.
And I also know my mother, and none of the arguments in favor of forcing Brynn to spend time with her will ever outweigh what I know. She might be my mother, and she might be old, and she might be lonely now that my father has died, but so what? She’s also judgmental, hateful, rude, and downright mean, and that’s not the kind of energy I want around Brynn.
Brynn asked not to have to see my mother anymore. I will respect that.
When my mom turns her attention back on me, it’s clear she’s not going to back down.
“Is this because of what I said about her little friend? Is that it?”
I tilt my head to the side and raise a brow. She knows damn well it’s because of more than that, but the body shaming comments she made about Cameron were the icing on the cake.
“What about the Larks,” my mom tries. “Is she going to see them? Helen and William haven’t seen her since Julianna’s funeral.”
I take another sip from my mug before answering.
“The Larks have made it more than clear that they don’t want anything to do with Brynn if they can’t dictate how she’s being raised.”
“Well, they are right that you should be taking her to church.”
“She goes to church.”
My mom’s eyes go wide.
“You take her?”
I shake my head no.
“Sometimes she’ll go with Sharon.”
My mother’s face turns murderous, full of disgust and anger.
“That woman,” my mom sneers. “How dare you let my granddaughter around that horrible woma—"
I slam my hand on the kitchen table, silencing her. She flinches and grits her teeth, nostrils flaring as she glares at me. I glare right back.
