Page 58 of Between Never and Forever
This is so dumb. I’ve been a girlfriend for all of a few hours, and I’m already becoming a psycho. I snort. I have to check myself if I want this long-distance thing to work.
I go to close out of the phone when a new text from Jules comes in.
When do you get back to town? I need to see you, Levi. It’s important, and I think we need to talk before we go to our parents.
I can’t breathe. Something dark and slimy coils in my stomach. Something telling me that this is bad. I know it is. My instincts are never wrong when it comes to shit like this.
Before I can think better of it, I send a text as Levi.
Just tell me now.
The chat bubbles pop up, then disappear. Pop up again, then disappear again. Then she tries to call, and I silence it.
I think it’s better we talk in person
That irritates me. My temper flares hot, and my annoyance skyrockets.
No. Just text it.
More chat bubbles. Appear, disappear. Appear, disappear. And then a photo comes through. It takes me a minute to realize what it is. When it finally registers, I can’t breathe. I can’t speak. I can’t do anything except stare.
This is it, I think. This is the hidden punch. This is thejoke’s on memoment. This is how the rug gets pulled out from under me.
“What are you doing?”
Levi’s voice makes me jump, heart in my throat, and when I look at him, standing in my doorway wrapped in a towel, the smile he was wearing falls right off his face.
“What’s wrong?” he says, rushing to me. “Why are you crying?”
I didn’t even realize I was crying.
“Who is Jules?”
The color drains from his face, and his eyes fall to the phone. He meets my eyes again, and I want to throw up. I don’t know if I want to sob or murder him. The sorrowful look on his face just makes it worse.
“Is she the ‘just once?’” I ask, already knowing the answer. He nods. “Did you know she was pregnant?”
I turn the phone to him, showing him the grainy ultrasound picture. His eyes fall shut, and I gasp. I can taste my tears on my lips.
“You knew? You knew, and you slept with me anyway?”
“No,” he says quickly. “I didn’t know for sure. She told me last week that she’d missed a period. Had a positive pregnancy test she got from the drug store, but those aren’t always accurate. I thought it was a false positive or something....”
I blink.
“I thought you weren’t dating anyone.”
“I’m not, I swear. I didn’t lie to you, Savannah. I slept with her one time. Once. We used a condom. I didn’t think....Fuck, I didn’t think it was anything.”
“Didn’tthink, or didn’twant?”
He lifts his shoulders in a heavy shrug. “I don’t know. Both?”
A dark laugh escapes me, and I close my eyes.
“Well, sorry to tell you, but it’s definitely something.”
“This doesn’t have to change anything,” he says quickly, and my eyes fly back open. “I still want to be with you. I don’t want to be with anyone else. I don’t love her. I want you, Sav.”
