Page 153 of For Wrath and Redemption
“And what about the other thing? Does she know?”
“It’s done, and as far as I know, she has no idea. The girls can keep secrets when they want to.”
I drum my fingers on my leg. “Okay.” I nod. “Okay. Good.”
“I know this isn’t going to help anything, but you don’t have to be nervous. She’s excited to see you. Everything is going to be fine.”
I don’t respond. Instead, I mentally run through every scenario.
I haven’t spoken to her in ninety days. I have no idea where her head is. I don’t even know if she still feels the way she did when I left her in New York. I begged her to give me another chance, and then I left her for three months.
A lot can change in three months.
I know becauseI’vechanged a lot in three months.
I told her she wouldn’t have to go through any of this alone, and then I left. I’ve missed so much already.
I’m sure I made the right choice for myself in going back to Tranquil Waters. I’m anxious and afraid, but I’m not running. I’mfeeling,and that’s huge. If I didn’t fixme, I could never deserveher. I would never be worthy ofus.
It was the right choice. I know it. I just hope Claire believes it, too. Ninety days ago, she said she loved me. I just keep replaying those words over and over in my head.
I love you, too.
Let’s earn it together.
She loves me. Ninety days wouldn’t undo that.
I glance at the GPS on the dash and my shoulders drop when I see a red line indicating stopped traffic on the freeway.
“Told you. I left at 8 a.m.”
Torren points to the ETA on the screen. Four hours. I groan and fix my eyes out the window. I don’t even have a book to read.
“Want me to tell you about it?”
“No,” I answer immediately. “I trust the girls.”
I see him glance at me from my periphery.
“You want to talk at all?”
I think it over. Would I have wanted to talk three months ago? A year ago? Should I want to talk now? Do I?
My lips curve into a small smile when I realize that I do.
“How’d the tour go?”
Torren returns my smile. “It went good. No issues. People were upset you weren’t there, but everyone for the most part understood. Ham’s been a puppet master with the media, thanks in large part to the groundwork Claire laid out. And it doesn’t hurt that Rock’s gotten himself a bit of a fan following. It’s that glittery pink Fender, I swear. People are obsessed with it.”
I arch a brow. “Is this where you tell me that you’re replacing me with Rocky Halstrom?”
He barks out a laugh. “Want me to tell you all the times he fucked up to make you feel better?”
“Hell yeah, I do,” I say on a laugh, and then I grin. A real, full-faced smile, and I feel lighter. I feel hopeful.
This. Speaking with Torren freely without having to worry about hiding my addiction. Laughing with him. Joking. This will be part of my new normal. I’ll create it myself. I’ll collect moments, piece them together, and rebuild my life from the ground up.
From the ground up, one day at a time, and with Claire front and center.
