Page 49 of A Sense of Turmoil
Flora sought out her precious collection of agrimonies, a water-based plant, and made up an infusion.
‘Here we are,’ she said, returning to the countess, supporting the back of her head and coaxing her to drink the concoction. ‘It will help to ease your breathing.’
‘Nothing helps,’ the countess replied, but she drank the potion anyway before sliding deeper beneath the covers and closing her eyes.
Flora sat with her charge for the rest of the day, through most of which the countess slept. She couldn’t be persuaded to eat very much but did at least take frequent drinks, complaining when Flora refused to give her brandy.
Luke came to see her late in the afternoon and was unsurprisingly worried by her deterioration.
‘We need to talk in private,’ she said to him in a quiet aside.
‘Come down to the library when you are free,’ he replied, looking grim-faced as he left the room.
Sandwell relieved Flora an hour later. She popped back to her room to tidy her hair, having had the entire day to think about what she would say to him. It wasn’t as though he could dismiss her for insubordination. He knew as well as she did that the countess would be heartbroken to lose her. Besides, she would be gone from here soon enough, come what may.
With no further excuse to dither, she straightened her shoulders and made her way downstairs. Luke and Romulus were alone in the library. Flora greeted them both, one more extravagantly than the other, and took a chair beside the fire with Romulus’s big head resting against her legs. Luke sat across from her, his smile strained.
‘She doesn’t have long, does she?’
‘No, Luke. I’m sorry. There’s little I can do for her, other than to keep her comfortable, and nothing that the doctor can do either.’
‘I know that.’ He dropped his head, rested his forearms on his splayed legs and examined the floor beneath them. Flora sensed that he was struggling to maintain his composure and waited him out in silence. ‘I am grateful to you beyond words for keeping her comfortable for as long as you have.’
Tears flooded Flora’s eyes, but she somehow kept them at bay. ‘She is very dear to me too,’ she said softly.
‘Is there anything…You wanted to speak with me.’
‘The worst possible thing would be for her to be exposed to anyone with a chill. Keep Ottilie away from her. She has the start of a cold.’
‘Very well. I was not aware of that.’ Luke looked at Flora askance. ‘How did you know that Ottilie has a cold? You have been upstairs all the time and not seen her, to the best of my knowledge. I saw her last night and she showed no signs of being unwell.’
‘Oh, Luke, just accept that I know. It really doesn’t matter how.’
Luke’s expression hardened. ‘I see.’
‘Have you heard from Sam?’ she asked, after an uncomfortable pause. There never used to be uncomfortable silences between them, and Flora had no intention of sitting through this one. She stood when Luke shook his head. ‘I had best get back.’
‘Say what you came to say, Flora.’
‘No, Luke. I won’t be accused of interfering in your life, because you will not accept my word for what I know and you will take exception to my good intentions.’
‘I know that you believe what you say,’ he replied with a weary sigh. Flora looked at him properly and observed the dark circles of strain beneath his eyes. He clearly hadn’t been sleeping any better than she had, and her heart went out to him. ‘Please, why did you mention Sam?’
‘There is something untoward with the estate accounts in Boston,’ she said, looking him straight in the eye and defying him to deny it. His expression cleared and he smiled at her, that seductive smile she once thought he reserved exclusively for her.
‘You have been misinformed on this occasion,’ he said. ‘I myself took a very careful look at the accounts when I was there and found nothing to excite my suspicions.’
‘Well, if it was that easy to find, whoever was responsible wouldn’t have got away with it for as long as they have.’
He shook his head decisively. ‘I know that you are wrong.’
‘If that is the case, have Sam take a closer look and confirm my error, then I shall happily apologise.’ When Luke hesitated, she pushed home her point. ‘You have several times asked how you can repay me for easing the countess’s pain. This is the way. All it will take on your part is a telegram to Sam, but in the meantime I would advise against…well, against any formal commitments to the Flemings.’
Luke’s face clouded with anger. ‘Ah, so we reach the crux of your objections. You are jealous.’
Flora stood, her face flaming with anger and embarrassment. She wanted to shout and rail and make him believe her. Make him open his mind at least. Surely she had proved herself to him in the time she had been at Beranger Court and he at least owed her the benefit of the doubt. But she did none of those things, and instead kept her voice calm as she struggled to hold her feelings at bay.
‘If you believe that of me then this conversation is at an end, as is our friendship,’ she said, ‘but at least I know that I am motivated by the very best of intentions. This family has embraced me and treated me with more kindness and affection than I had any right to expect. In return, I do my humble best to protect you from those who seek to exploit you. Nothing more.’
