Page 23 of Lessons in Falling
I mumbled an incoherent reply.I don’t think Iactuallytried saying anything with substance.
Morning light peeked through the curtains, drenched parts of the room in a soft orange—his face, for example.The sun played in his short, platinum-blond hair, softened his features and made the smile in the corner of his lips seem… ethereal.I blinked at what others might call a heavenly sight, sleep still slurring my thoughts.
What?Caden said ironically, and his head tilted in amusement.I read your list.You wanted to go for a run, which issomething I do almost every other day.It seemed selfish not to take you eventually,he explained.I was too tired to argue that it just seemed odd, after he’d ignored me for a week.Odder, because I was supposed to ignore him as well.Now more than ever.
I wasn’t known to sleep late, but that didn’t mean my mornings had to start at six.Let someone try and wake me before eight, and it usually didn’t end well.
Now, though, I yawned again, then actually meant to sit up.To go running?With Caden?
Only that I was still so tired, I forgot that the ceiling was barely fifteen inches above me, and I would’ve hit my head.Hard.Borderline-concussion hard.If it weren’t for the hand that rushed out, curled around me and kept me from a potential hospital visit.
Caden’s hand lingered on top of my head, and I groaned when I let myself fall back into the pillow.See,I said gruffly.Nothing good comes of me being awake at this hour.Or us, talking to each other.When I turned my head, it might’ve been the first time we’d had eye contact since last week, but I was sincere when I added,Thank you.
Caden swallowed thickly, then took a deep breath during which he probably weighed his options.Be nice to Valentina, who’s gone out of her way not to be.Or give her the cold shoulder like you have been.
Get your ass up, Valentina.We’re leaving in ten.
I cannot believe I’m doing this.I cannot believe I’m wearing leggings and a sports bra.I cannot believe Caden is carrying my water bottle.I cannot believe I’m running.With him.
But I was.Uphill.And at a pace that was probably four minutes a mile slower than his usual time.Partially noticeable by the fact that Caden had barely broken a sweat in the two miles so far.Meanwhile, I didn’t remember the last time my pulse had been this high.
We’d almost reached the top of whatever hill he had me running up.At this point, I felt so slow, a fast-paced walk would’ve probably been faster.I briefly considered stopping, but saw Caden slowing down—which meant that he’d made it, which meant that I was about to make it.Probably.Hopefully.If I didn’t collapse before.
I did not.
I made it to the top, even if barely, and immediately slumped over.My hands landed on my knees, my eyes closed, and I waited for my breathing to become less ragged.In the corner of my eye, I noticed my bottle and took it without even looking at Caden.And I chugged all sixteen fluid ounces of water.
I think it took me five minutes to fully come back to my senses.My breathing slowed, the taste of blood in my mouth disappeared, and I looked around for the first time.
Caden sighed.Aren’t you glad that I forced you up now?
Unfortunately, I had to admit that I was lying when I shook my head and said,No.
Because it was, in fact, breathtaking.In one direction, the sun reflected in the water of the ocean this early in the morning, making it glitter a blinding white.And the fog, still settling over the land behind us in the other direction, cloaked it in an eerily beautiful grey.Everything about the view, in every direction, was beautiful.It seemed like he was returning the favor for our stargazing.
There was a bench overlooking the sea, and the grass it stood on was so green that it seemed painted.The pain of getting here was almost forgotten, and the only reminder was my breathing, still not quite back to normal.
No?Caden confirmed.The smile on his lips said he knew I was lying.
I shook my head, finally turned toward him.No.Especially because it was without a warning.Especiallybecause you forced me out of bed after ignoring me for a week.
His eyes narrowed in amusement.The corner of his lip curled deeper, and he tilted his head when he took a single step toward me.
One step too close, my rational thoughts screamed.Go on, take another one, an entirely different part of me begged.
Isn’t that what you wanted?he asked, entirely unconvinced.
Itis.It was what I wanted.It was.It was.It was.Maybe if I repeated the words enough times in my head, I’d believe them.
He cocked a brow.Then what’s the issue, Valentina?
There is no issue,Caden,I mocked back.Hoping it would change the direction I could tell this was heading in.Kind of wishing it would lead us further toward it.
Good.He nodded, his eyes flitting away from me.A second later, he was back.Attention on me, stepping closer once more.All I’m doing is trying to respect your boundaries.I might’ve been ignoring you, but that’s only because every time I looked at you, none of my thoughts were holy.
My breath grew heavy again, but it had nothing to do with my cardio, and everything to do with what was happening in the pit of my stomach.Heat that unfurled, and memories thatshot through my head with lightning speed.They weren’t holy, either.
Right then, on a cliff miles away from my friends—so early, none of them were even aware I was gone—I wanted to kiss him.I played with the possibility, ran the scenario through my mind over and over again.And tried to push every voice in my head (one of them belonged to me, the other to Iris, repeating every reason that I shouldn’t do this a million times) away.
