Page 29 of Lessons in Falling
Getting up, she tried her best to dust off the sand stuck to her bare legs and the fabric of her black sundress.She failed, of course, but what had almost happened between us—again— seemed too recent to offer my help in the matter.Any physical contact would probably lead us right back into the sand.
So all I did was wish her goodnight before watching her make her way back to the house.It seemed like she needed that time alone, and I gave her ten minutes before I followed into our room.
CHAPTER 16
VALENTINA
I was pacing.Up and down; from the window overlooking the front yard to the dresser opposite it.But trying to walk this off—this pulsing need for Caden right below my skin, pushing closer to the surface every time he touched me or whispered my name or I looked at him for a little too long, really—was harder than I’d imagined.
It was too easy to remember where all the flirting and half-kisses could lead.Where ithadled, four months ago.With his lips all over me, his body between mine, and three orgasms.With sweet nothings whispered against my skin, and a warm chest to fall asleep against.
He hadn’t seemed like the type of guy to want his girls to stay the night, so I’d left before dawn had even broken.
Behind me, the door creaked open, and it didn’t take a genius to know who’d walked into the room.I must’ve still looked like a deer in headlights by the time Caden closed it behind himself again.
For a long moment, he just stood there, not daring to takea single step closer.He let his gaze fall down and back up my body—too slowly to be considered casual.Too intently to be considered anything but appraising.
You’re still up,he noted, voice low.Presumably not to wake the rest of the house.I appreciated that.
I left, like, two minutes ago.Of course I’m still up.The bite in my tone wasn’t justified.He hadn’t done anything wrong—Iwas the one that kept breaking my own rules over and over again.The one who kept jumping between loyalty and selfishness.
With a sigh, Caden leaned against the door behind him, crossing his arms lazily.Listen,he said.If you don’t want this, it’s not happening.That’s how simple it is.You don’t need a reason to say no.
Didn’t I, though?I thought every decision needed some kind of justification.
You don’t need to justify not wanting me, alright?
I couldn’t help but laugh.He didn’t know better, but the assumption that I didn’twanthim was so… far from the truth, I couldn’t hold back my amusement.I waved the look he gave me off.I’m sorry,I snickered.It’s just—I hesitated, then thoughtfuck it.
This was Caden, and I’d been brutally honest—borderline mean—to him since he’d gotten here.I still didn’t want him to like me, so why tell him anything but the truth?
Not wanting you is not the issue here, trust me.He perked up—straightened and narrowed his eyes at me, like he was trying to figure me out.
I wasn’t quite sure when I’d decided to cross the room, but I stood in front of him five seconds later.I do want you.Somuch, I’m considering breaking my morals every time you look at me like that.Lips slightly parted, blue eyes hooded, pupils wide.
He tugged a strand of hair behind my ear, and it took everything in me not to lean into the tender touch.
With a subtle grin, he asked,Sleeping with me would break your morals?That’s how awful I am?
That’s how awful I’d be for doing it.
In a sense,I said regardless.
The smile on his lips stayed, and he tilted his head, just slightly.We shouldn’t, then,he whispered.His hand still lingered on my cheek, his thumb absentmindedly drawing circles against my skin.Touch, as always, light as a feather.
No,I agreed.We shouldn’t.
He turned us, brought my back against the wooden door, and let his hand linger where he’d placed it to move me: my waist.Because of your friends,he said.Right?
Sure.I nodded.Yes.
Now here’s a thought, though.And I was desperate to hear it, because I knew in which direction it was leading.Because I knew he was going to give me reasons to justify how close he was, and that I could have him closer if they were good enough.Doing something because you want it—
Doingyoubecause I want it?I clarified, half a laugh on my lips.
He grinned.Yes.Doing me because you want it.Kind of like with that list of yours.You’re not telling anyone because you want to do that for yourself as well, right?
I’m doing that because I don’t think anyone would want to do it with me.But sure.Honest truth, again.But I couldn’tfocus on the admission when his touch danced along my side, up to my chest, then over my waist all the way down to my hips.
