Page 40 of Lessons in Falling
Water,I said.I made no move to get any, though.For Iris.
Just saying her name in his presence felt wrong at this point, but…You can’t live the one life you have always pleasing the people around you.So I said yes to Caden.In my mind, I’d been saying yes to him for a while.For myself.
He nodded, then let his gaze slide down my body.Excruciatingly slowly.Like it was the first time I was wearing that red checkered bikini when it was not.And like it was the first time he’d seen me in it—when he’d seen me with much less on.
He reached for my hip, pulled me closer, and it didn’t even seem like a conscious decision.I don’t know if I’ll ever get used to this,he muttered.I was surprised I understood anything he said at all, over the sound of fruit still mixing beside us.
My head tilted.What?
Caden’s blue eyes jumped back to mine, pupils wide.You.In this.His hand traced up my back, along my shoulders, then dipped all the way down to my waist again.It’s my favorite.He smiled.
Why am I not surprised your favorite outfit of mine is the one that covers the least?I laughed, and tried to ignore the goosebumps his touch left behind.Partly due to the AC blasting in here, I’m sure.The same went for how hard my nipples were.It was cold, that’s all.
Caden shook his head, inched his face a little closer to mine.Noooo,he whined.My favoritebikini,he corrected.My favorite outfit is that dress of yours.The black one, with the white, low neckline.He huffed, and placed a single kiss against my collarbones.Makes your boobs look great.He grinned.
I snickered, and laughed and snorted—all in one, somehow—and then I kissed him.
It’s where this exchange would’ve led, anyway.I was just accelerating the process, because I didn’t know how much time we’d have by ourselves, and it would be a shame to waste it.
He hummed against my mouth, content and pleased.A little surprised—but not really.Without even looking, he turned the blender off, and it was silent.From outside, you could hear water splashing and amused screeches.But it was still quiet enough to notice his breaths turning heavy, and the way he groaned when his palm spread over my bare ass.He fiddled with the strings of my bikini, frustrated by the fact he couldn’t untie and take it off.
I want you,he groaned into my mouth, and the sound traveled straight between my legs.All the way, Val.Taste you, feel you, hear you.
Impossible.And it frustrated me just as much.I’d hoped, now that we’d been touching whenever we could, I’d be more satisfied.Wouldn’t want him as badly as I did back when I couldn’t touch him at all.But it had made it worse.Tasting his lips on mine, his teeth playfully digging into my lower lip, his hands all over me and all those filthy sounds and words whispered against my skin.It drove me crazy.With everyone around.We can’t—
I know.His lips traveled down my neck, and I threw my head back in response.My lips parted, and every sound that wanted to make it past them, I held back.This will have to do, I know.But a man can dream.
So could a woman.
And I was.Of a reality in which Caden and I were the onlyones living here.Where I could wear nothing but oversized shirts, and he could walk around with that God-forsaken towel hanging low on his waist.Where a single fleeting touch would leave us naked, sprawled across various surfaces— couch, kitchen island, sun chairs.A reality in which we could have each other anywhere, all the time, and wouldn’t have to worry about the sounds we might make when we came in sync, because no one was around to hear them.
The thought alone was enough to consider having him right here, right now.Icould.If I’d had the guts, I’d get on my knees, take him out of those swim shorts, and wrap my lips around him right here, behind the kitchen island.
Thankfully, my consideration was cut short.Somewhere behind us, I heard the door to the yard slide open.We had about two seconds before—
Valentina?
We shot apart.Caden started frantically cleaning the kitchen, and I turned on my heels to get to the fridge.By the time Iris could see us, I was neck deep in it—not to find the cooled water, but to regulate my body back to a normal temperature.To get that blush off my cheeks.
Water!I announced, then closed the fridge forcefully with a bottle in hand.I threw it at Iris, and was lucky she caught it before it broke her nose.Sorry,I winced.
Her brows furrowed, eyes scanning the chilled bottle in her hand before returning back to me.Once, they flicked to Caden, pouring his smoothie into a glass.
Could we be any more obvious?
Before she could make an observation, Anni and Alfie joined us inside, dripping across the floor.Ready?The blondesent a questioning glance across the three of us, who were tiptoeing around (what I thought was) the obvious.
Caden jumped at the opportunity.For what?he asked, around a mouthful of smoothie.I was impressed it wasn’t dripping down his chin.
And it seemed—lucky me—Iris dismissed her suspicion.It only made me feel worse, though.We wanted to head into Isleton,she said, and took a sip of water.Get ice-cream, stroll along the boardwalk for a bit.Her eyes found mine, and her brows rose questioningly.Talk about that phone call,she added, only to me.
Alfie, oblivious, announced:Go shopping, maybe.
I thought of Caden’s hypocritical words.Say no, sometimes.Then say yes other times.
Maybe this was a harmless enough thing to say no to—just to try it out?See what it felt like?If they didn’t like it, I could still just let myself be convinced.
I glanced around the room.Why don’t you go ahead?I think I’m gonna pass this time.
