Page 53 of Lessons in Falling
You’re not anyone’s.
Well.I shrugged, tried to play it cool.Tried not to show how much she affected me, how I had to resist the urge to breathe in her smell, lean into her touch.Yours, apparently.I mean, youmarkedme.I gasped, scandalized, and with another eye roll, she brushed past me.Her absence—although she was still right there, only disappearing into the bathroom andrummaging through something, by the sound of it—left a cold imprint behind.
Let’s fix that.Sorry,she repeated, voice still muffled out of the adjacent room.Valentina came back with a clear tube of makeup.Concealer, maybe?It’d been a while since Alison had forced me to sit model for one of her very elaborate, very colorful makeup looks.Her live commentary still haunted some distant corner of my mind, but what Valentina was about to smother onto my neck, I couldn’t say.
It irked me, forgetting things about my sister.Concealer?I guessed.
Wow.She unscrewed the top, revealing a little wand covered in something at leastcloseto my skin tone, and stopped right by my side again.Good, something inside of me screamed.You know your makeup.Is that why your skin looks air-brushed?Have you been deceiving all of us?
She always squinted when she laughed at her own jokes.I stored that piece of information with the rest of them.Right between the fact that she played with her necklace when she was nervous, and that little sound she made right when she was on the edge of an orgasm.
Feeling the cool tip of it against my neck, knowing she was the one gently brushing it across my skin, sent a shiver down my spine and goosebumps up my neck.I exhaled—sighed contentedly, really.
Thank you,I teased, and for a moment, she froze, like she hadn’t noticed her compliment.
Quickly, she closed the concealer, threw it on top of her bunk, and got back to blending it into my skin.I’d expected a sponge, but got her fingers instead.I thank my skin-careroutine for this.With my finger, I circled my own face.Three steps, a pain in the ass every morning and night.But it gets the job done.
She nodded knowingly.Another glance at the round mirror beside us, and like I’d suspected, any trace of a hickey was gone.But she was still touching me.How do you know, then?Girlfriend?she asked, and her voice wasn’t carrying quite the same confidence it usually did.
Despite the right answer being my dead sister, I couldn’t help smile.Thatwas new.Why?Jealous?
She huffed, tried to get the concealer from her bed to put it back, but didn’t get that far.My hand curled around her wrist before I really knew it, and I tugged her back against my body.Her round eyes blinked up at me, long lashes batting against her cheeks.Have I ever given you a reason to be jealous?
You mean apart from your reputation as the fuckiest fuckboy on campus?
I snickered, and for a second, her eyes flicked to my fingers around her wrist, like she was just as aware of every point of contact between us.I wouldn’t gothatfar.And friendly reminder, you were the one that snuck out of my room a few months ago.
I don’t usually do that,she clarified, like it should’ve been obvious.Her eyes narrowed in faked offense, but all I could think of was how cute she looked.How kissable, and holdable, and touchable.Which was probably the opposite of the reaction she’d hoped for.But I couldn’t help it.
My fingers slid up her arm, behind her back, and she took one more step toward me, letting us stand toe-to-toe.Nose-to-nose.Lips-to-lips.But you did.
Like you would’ve wanted,she guessed, but it was barely a whisper.I could feel her breath on my lips.They were tingling from her close proximity.
She was probably right.I didn’t usually fall asleep cuddling, and I didn’t usually wake up with a woman in my bed—or me, in hers.But waking up lonely when there’d been someone you’d fallen asleep with, even if it had been an accident, had been… weird, to say the least.It was at least part of the reason why I’d still been thinking about Valentina four months after the fact.It’s probably why, when she’d walked into our room a month ago, my heart had plummeted into the pit of my stomach.
I think,I said, lowly.My voice was rougher than I’d intended it to be, and I cleared my throat.Maybe I would’ve liked it.Definitely, at least, making you come again the next morning would’ve been fun.She meant to retort something— cheeks red again, eyes narrowing again—but I cut her off.See, what your people-pleasing tendencies have robbed us of?
At least we’d made up for whatever we’d missed that morning.We’d exceeded everything it could’ve been, by a lot.
She gnawed on her bottom lip in thought, eyes jumping back to mine.She played with the necklace previously hidden under her shirt.Alright,was the response she settled on, after a long pause.She swallowed thickly.Okay.Maybe you’re right.Maybe I should focus on what I want more than what others might want from me.
And all it took for you to admit it was realizing you missed out on great sex with Caden Callahan.Incredible,I muttered, amused, pulling her closer again.Letting my hand brush down her back, settling on the lower half.
The kiss I placed on her lips was slow, and sweet, and fleeting.The way she followed my lips when I pulled away was heartbreakingly wholesome.Same as the sound she made somewhere in the back of her throat.
I didn’t remember the last time I’d kissed someone that way.I wasn’t sure if I ever had.Short and sweet and without the intention of eventually taking things further.
But then,she said, and perhaps Valentinawastrying to take things further, because she started nudging me toward our bed.Without even the thought of complaining, I tripped onto the lower bunk, and pulled her onto my lap—legs on either side of me.I feel like it’s only fair you start making certain life choices for yourself as well.
Her voice was soft, tone gentle and kind.She was, again, playing with the charm on her necklace.A shimmering, orange crystal.I leaned back onto my elbows, pillow behind me, eyes trained on her.
I was waiting for the usual fight-or-flight reaction when certain life choices of mine were questioned or the topic of my sister came up.For another row of bricks to be put on top of my walls, and for the guards at the gates to unsheathe their swords.But nothing.
Valentina still sat on my lap, having abandoned her necklace to let her fingers draw up and down my shirt absentmindedly.Her eyes were ferociously trained on her hands, and even when I grabbed the one now fiddling with the hem of my shirt, she didn’t look up.
You’re so beautiful, Val.Which finally did make her look at me.Her eyes jumped to mine, and there was a red sheen to her cheeks again—one that told me she liked mycompliments, despite how uncomfortable they made her.One that told me she liked when I called her Val, even though she’d never expressed it.
I wasn’t usually great at reading people, and she was still a mystery to me, but in situations like this, it was so easy with her.Like she was written for me.Like I’d known how to interpret every twitch of her brow before I’d even met her.
