Page 111 of Distortion
‘No can do,’ Blake murmurs. ‘Your pants are still open.’
She glances over at me, her cheeks suddenly very pink.
Blake takes her into his room, but instead of putting her down, he sits on the bed with her still in his arms.
‘What happened in there?’ he asks.
‘Nothing.’
He tuts at her. ‘That wasn’t nothing.’
Her expression has shuttered completely. ‘I just ... thought of something.’
‘What was it?’
She doesn’t answer.
‘Whatever that something was, it was like someone threw a bucket of ice over you,’ he remarks, ‘and I’m pretty sure you were very close.’
‘Close?’ she ask. ‘Close to what?’
My eyes lock with Blake’s.
‘Close to ... you know ...orgasm.’
‘Oh,’ she seems to say to herself like a lightbulb is going on in her head.
‘Daisy,’ I say carefully. ‘You’ve had one ... before, right? Like even by yourself?’
She winces and Blake’s eyes widen comically.
‘Never?’ he whispers in awed horror. ‘Not even by touching yourself?’
‘Well,’ she takes a breath. ‘I diddo thatonce at The Heath. I was curious. I’d heard some of the blanks talking about their partners?—’
‘Blanks?’
‘Orderlies, I guess. Anyway, before I could feel much of anything, one of them caught me. BloodySue. She went straight to Stoke. The guy in charge. I had to go to his office, tell him exactly what I had been doing and why.’
She curls in on herself, not looking at us. ‘It was so embarrassing. He sent me to one of the other doctors who sat me on a medical table and made me open my legs. He used cold, slippery stuff and ametalthing. Then, he took swabs from inside of me. He said they needed to make sure I wasn’t hurting myself, and that I hadn’t inserted things that weren’t supposed to ... It wasnotnice!’ Her eyes narrow to slits. ‘And then I lost running privileges for the whole week on top of that.’
‘Jesus, Daisy.’
She shrugs like it was no big deal. ‘I never did it again. Wasn’t worth it.’
‘So, you were afraid of something like that while I was touching you?’ Blake sounds horrified.
She looks incredulous. ‘No, I was scared you were going to rip the blanket off and show everyone! It made it not fun.’ She looks miserable. ‘I’m sorry.’
Blake’s devastation is evident in his eyes for precisely a millisecond before he locks himself down.
‘I would never have done that,’ he says quietly. ‘You have nothing to be sorry for.I’msorry. It was too fast. We don’t have that kind of trust yet. It was my fault.’
‘I liked it,’ she says quietly. ‘I just didn’t like that there were so many people there, who ... aren’t nice.’
Blake lets her go and I expect her to leave, to run into her room, but she doesn’t. She shuffles back on his bed and takes off the blanket. She looks at Blake in clear invitation.
‘Would you like me to leave?’ I ask, feeling awkward just standing here.
