Page 118 of Distortion
My mind stutters to a halt and the color drains from my face as I look at the time stamp. It was sent last night. The cameras... but Blake said he turned them off.
Did one of them send me this? Was Blake lying when he said no one else has seen me on camera? Have they showed the other members of the frat? Have all of them seen what happened last night?
I feel sick. I stare at the email, my mind working feverishly and snowballing as I try to glean anything from the random letters and numbers, but I think that really is all they are.
Do I confront the guys? Do I tell them what I know?
I frown at myself in the mirror.
WhatdoI know? Only that someone is messing with me and wants me to look into my mother’s death. And that someone is getting frustrated that I’m not doing what they want. Not knowing what to think, I close the laptop quickly just as I hear a knock at my door.
‘Come in,’ I say after giving myself a moment to compose myself.
Blake comes in and I regard him coldly.
He hesitates at the door when he sees my face. ‘Everything okay?’ he asks.
‘Everything’s fine,’ I answer and, belatedly, offer a small smile that I hope is convincing.
It should be. It’s the one I’ve practiced the most, the one that got me out of my sessions at The Heath sometimes because I looked so passably ‘normal’.
I watch him visibly relax and realize that I’m noticing nuances of expression and gesture with them more now that I’m getting to know them a little. It was the same at The Heath. It took me longer than a few weeks to figure the blanks out, though. I wonder what that means? Maybe I’m getting faster at it. Though I know there’s something different about Shade, Mav, and Blake. At least for me there seems to be. I like the way they look, smell, feel. Even their voices aren’t annoying. I haven’t licked them, but if I did, would they taste good, too?
But how my senses react to them aren’t the only important things, I remind myself. What about trust?
‘Shade and I are going to grab breakfast and head to the lab. Your class doesn’t start until later, right? Wanna join us?’
‘I’d love to,’ I hear myself saying, ‘but I ...have a shift at the coffee shop.’
He doesn’t look convinced of my lie.
I put my hand on top of the laptop and feel how smooth it is. I let it ground me and I smile at him.
‘You didn’t have to give me this,’ I say.
He shrugs. ‘I got a new one before school started this year. It was just sitting in a drawer.’
‘Well, thank you,’ I say.
‘Sure. Just remember nothing from the lab goes on it though, okay? You can’t bring any of the work home.’
I nod and there’s an awkward pause as we stare at eachother. I don’t know what he’s thinking, but I’m wondering if this thing will be spying on me, too.
Though in a pragmatic sense, is being on surveillance here any different than at The Heath. Not really.
Well, except for the weirdo who keeps sending the notes and now the email.
‘Well, I guess we’ll see you later on at the lab?’
I nod.
‘Okay,’ he says slowly, giving me a confused look. ‘Hey, I’m sorry if I did anything last night that wasn’t cool.’
You mean potentially sharing explicit videos of me to my semi-stalker?
I stand up suddenly, using the burst of energy to vent my pent-up feelings.
‘You didn’t,’ I say, giving him another dose of the normal smile. ‘I’m sorry if I seem a little ... out of it. I didn’t sleep well last night.’
