Page 42 of Distortion
Mav is leaning against the door jamb. They’re all looking at me.
I step back and plonk myself on the bed.
‘He said it was okay, that it was just juice. It tasted like juice.’
Shade
‘Yeah, it does taste like juice.’My voice is hard, and I see her flinch a little like she hears my anger, so I try to sound less like I want to punch a wall as I continue, ‘but it isn’t, sweetheart. It’s mixed with grain alcohol. It’s really strong.’
Sweetheart?What is wrong with me?
‘He lied.’
Her disappointment is palpable, and it makes me want to shred Marcus for plying her with this much alcohol when she had no idea.
She looks away from us towards the far side of the room.
‘Just wanted to be like the others,’ she whispers so quietly that I think it was only to herself.
I’m transported to a night a few weeks before she was sent away. She told me that she wished she could figure out what was wrong with her so the other kids would like her. She wanted to belong. It was the longest conversation we’d ever had, and I was on Cloud Nine afterward because she’d never spoken so much to anyone else.
‘The others?’ Blake is standing in front of her, and I suddenly want both my friends out of here when she’s this unguarded. Fuck knows what she’s going to say next.
‘You wouldn’t understand,’ she slurs as she lays back on the bed and closes her eyes.
Her breathing evens out, and I’m pretty sure she’s passed out.
I take in her tight, black dress and bare legs, noticing a small patch of calloused skin on her left calf and wondering what happened. The makeup is different from what she wore for the funeral, but she did say she had a friend who did hermakeover.
‘Find out who the friend is. The pledges should know ifthey’re doing their jobs right,’ I mutter, ‘and make sure all those dumb fucks downstairs know she’s not to be given alcohol again unless she’s with one of us.’ I glance at him. ‘Andtell Marcus I want to talk to him. He knew what he was doing, and I want to know why. What was he planning?’
‘We told them to mess with her,’ Blake says with a shrug.
His eyes are all over Daisy, and I want to tell him to get the fuck out.
‘By getting her this wasted? Anything could have happened to her if we hadn’t been here,’ I seethe. ‘I’ve heard more than one of those assholes talking about her this week. I’ve seen them watching her. Even without them, she was about to walk through broken glass barefoot, for Christ’s sake!’
I start pacing her room.
‘She’s no different from any of the other girls down there getting hammered,’ Mav says, and I can literally hear his eyes rolling.
‘Yes, she is!’ I hiss at him. ‘Fuck!’ I pull a hand through my hair roughly. ‘She shouldn’t be here. We need her gone. Tell them ...’ I close my eyes and hope she doesn’t last much longer as I tamp down the guilt that I’ve started to feel. It has no place in my dealings with her. God knows she wouldn’t feel the same, not really. It’s all smoke and mirrors with her.
‘Tell them to keep fucking with her all next week and ... tell them to ramp it up. I saw her down there just now. No alcohol or substances though.’ I cast a look at her. ‘She’s close to losing it, and once she does, this farce is over.’
‘What should we do with her now?’ Blake asks.
I hear Mav’s disparaging chuckle. ‘It was only a few shots. What’s the big deal?’
I give him a hard look. Does he really not get it? ‘She’sbeen in a clinic for a decade. You think she’s ever drank alcohol before?’
‘Shit, no. I guess not.’
I sit on the bed next to her passed-out form.
‘I’ll stay here with her for a while,’ I say, leaning back on the pillows and making myself comfortable.
‘Can one of you grab her a glass of water and some aspirin?’
