Page 58 of Escape Velocity
Mason starts walking behind him. He has no intention of following him, but for some reason, his feet are carrying him in Callum’s direction, feeling this magnetic pull like they’re both opposing electrical charges.
Callum’s fast, so Mason has to pick up his pace, and after a couple of minutes, Callum turns into a gated area.
Mason looks up at the archways of the gate and sees that it’s Northwood’s graveyard.
Guilt and grief churn in his stomach as the realization dawns on him. Callum is going to visit his mom.
He knows he should turn around and leave Callum alone. That’s what the more mature version of him would do.
But right now, being back in Northwood, he feels the need to support his old best friend through the grief of his mom dying.
Against his better judgment, he quietly follows Callum into the graveyard, making sure to sidestep crunchy dead leaves and sticks as he walks down the main path.
He keeps walking around aimlessly, trying to listen for other footsteps. He’s forgotten where Mrs. Brown’s plot is. It’s been years since he last visited her, a month before he and Callum stopped being friends.
Mason stops as he hears a voice coming from his left. He whips his head around and sees the glow of a flashlight in the distance, a few plots away near a mausoleum.
He can see by the person’s frame that it’s Callum.
He steps behind a tree and listens.
“…I thought by now I’d feel happier. I have everything I want. I have everything I could ever ask for. Why do I feel like I’ve been given the wrong end of the deal?” Callum says.
His voice is strained, pleading for the answer to a question. One that’s plagued him for years and that he’s turning to someone dead to get the answer to.
“EverythingI do is for you. If you really are watching over me… then you’ll see that. But I’ve been such a disappointment to you. I knowI have been. I’ve done everything I can to be where I am… but the people I’ve hurt to get there… I can’t even forgive myself. I did it all foryou, Mom. I wanted it so badly and now I have it. But what did I give up to get here? My dignity? My honor? The person who knew me better than anyone else ever could? I screwed it all up for everything I have—” the voice breaks, a sob breaking out of him. Mason sees his chest heave.
Grief sits on Mason’s chest like a fifty-pound weight. He can’t believe that a version of Callum like this still exists. That feels remorse and grief for his dead mother. He’s only imagined a self-absorbed and egomaniacal caricature of a person ever since they stopped being friends.
“I need you to forgive me, Mom. I know you loved Mason so much, but I don’t think I can ever make it up to him. I can’t pick up pieces of the mess I’ve made…”
Realization hits him like an autumn chill.
Callum’s talking to his mom about him.
If he doesn’t feel like he was already, Mason is surely intruding now. This is a private conversation between Callum and his mom; this was not the time to pretend like they were childhood best friends.
He takes a step back quickly, but he steps on a twig, making it snap. Callum’s head whips up and looks behind him.
Mason’s vision is blinded with a flashlight, and he puts his hand out in front of him, trying to block it.
Embarrassment floods over him.
“Callum—” Mason begins, but Callum’s already hurrying off, with his hands in his pockets and his head hanging low, his tall and burly frame reminding him of a Sasquatch.
Mason sighs and walks over to the tombstone. There’s a bouquet of chrysanthemums placed on top of the headstone and a lit candle on the grass. They were April’s favourite flower because of their association with autumn. She’d plant so many of them. He and Callum used to help her plant them in her garden.
Mason’s lips tremble and that familiar sting of tears comes back.
Mason knew her. He knew Mrs. Brown very well.
He used to dance around her living room to his favorite songs. Bake apple pies with her. She would sing lullabies to him when he would sleep over.
She would tell him he could be whatever he wanted to be. Even as the cancer overcame her. She still said it.
He stuck by her until the bitter end.
The loss was just as much his as it was Callum’s when she passed away.
