Page 44 of All Autumn
“I’m a man. It’s what we do. And I have to say that yours is perfection, so it’s not my fault that I can’t stop looking. It’s yours.”
“Have to tell you, not fond of the men checking out women’s butts thing.”
I gave my forehead a mental slap.Idiot. I’d just reminded her of Brian. “I’m sorry, Autumn.” I set the wine and ice cream on the counter, then moved in front of her. “I wasn’t thinking.”
She slipped her hands into mine. “No, it’s okay. I actually like that you appreciate my butt. It’s just been a bad night, and I’m touchy right now.”
“I gather your visit with your mom didn’t go well?”
“You could say that.” She let go of my hands, fished a wine opener out of a drawer, and handed it to me.
I opened the bottle and filled our glasses while she grabbed two spoons, then took them and the ice cream to her kitchen island. After we’d settled on the bar stools, I said, “How does this work? We just eat right out of the carton?” I grinned at her eye roll. “Seriously, this is only my second pity party, and I want to get it right.” I’d pity-partied with her every day of the first week after she and Brian had split, but I didn’t think she remembered much of that time.
“Yes, Connor, that’s how we do it.”
We finished our glass of wine and made a sizable dent in the ice cream while she told me what had happened. I didn’t say anything as I listened, but I was getting angrier by the minute. What sorry excuses for parents her mother and father were. It was hard to relate to that because mine had been pretty awesome.
Sure, Adam and I got into trouble and were punished, but the punishment always fit the crime. We never doubted they loved us, and they never put us in the middle of any arguments between them. Not that I remember them fighting much. If they had, they did it out of our sight and hearing.
It seemed to me that her parents were determined to suck the life out of their daughter. Autumn had always been defensive of her parents, especially her mother, so I was going to have to carefully choose my words. But I was proud of her for finally standing up to her mother. It was about time.
“I told my mother not to call me unless she wanted to dress up and have lunch with me while wearing a smile on her face.”
I paused with a spoon loaded with ice cream halfway to my mouth. “Do you mean that?” Was Autumn finally going to remove herself from a toxic situation? God, I hoped so.
“Yeah, but… Well, I’ve never told anyone this before, but she’s hinted that she’ll do something, you know, like swallow a bottle of pills or sit in her car in the garage with the motor running.” She looked at me with the saddest eyes I’d ever seen. “What if someday I refuse to come when she calls and she follows through on her threats? I’d never be able to forgive myself for that.”
Hell. I had no idea what the right thing to say here was. Although I thought Melinda’s saying things like that was just another way of controlling Autumn and she had no intention of killing herself, the woman was unpredictable.
“Do you really see her not sticking around, if for no other reason than to torment you and your father?”
Autumn shrugged. “Not really, which is why I’m not too worried. On the other hand, I can see her doing that simply to punish Dad or even me.”
I set my spoon down. “I get what you’re saying about feeling guilty if something like that ever happened, but Autumn, you’re not responsible for her or her actions. Anything stupid she might do is on her, not you.”
“I know that in theory, but I’d still never forgive myself. It gets even better. As soon as I left, she called my dad, and then he called me. The gist of the conversation was that I’m an awful daughter to treat my mother that way.”
“What I’d like to know is how you managed to become an adult with her act together after growing up in that house?” I took her spoon out of her hand, sticking it into the ice cream. “I’m so angry right now for you that it’s a good thing your parents aren’t here, or they’d get an earful.”
I tugged on her hands, pulling her off the stool until she was standing between my legs. “As much as I want to tell you to cut them out of your life unless and until they start treating you right, I won’t. How you go forward with them is your decision, but I hope you really mean that you’re going to stand your ground with your mother. Who knows, that might be exactly what she needs to wake up and see what she’s doing to you. As for your father, to hell with him. He hasn’t earned the right to say those things to you, and furthermore, he’s dead wrong.”
“Thanks for that and for being here, Connor. You make a pretty good pity-party partner.” She leaned into me, resting her face on my chest.
“Careful, you’re starting to sound like Mary with all the alliterations.”
She laughed. “God help me, I did.”
“That aside, anytime you need a pity partner, I’m your man. I’ve got the hang of it now. Ice cream, wine, and a pair of good listening ears.”
“Just so you know, the ice cream was great, but cake is a better pity food. In my opinion, anyway.”
“Duly noted.” I lowered my chin, resting it on her head. This close to me, I could smell her scent, feel the softness of her body against mine—especially her breasts pressing into my chest—and that was about all it took to get aroused. I wanted her so badly that it hurt, but above all else, she was my friend. And that was what she needed right now, a friend.
“Can one divorce their parents?”
I smiled into her hair. “I think it’s been done.” Before she felt what was going on below my belt against her belly, I put my hands on her waist, picked her up, and set her a few feet away. “Why don’t you go change into those cute little puppy pants you had on the other night, and I’ll find us a movie to watch. Is it a pity-party rule that it has to be a sappy one?”
“Most definitely, but it’s late. You’re probably wishing you were home, asleep in your bed.”
