Page 34 of The Spirit Key
A sense of longing went through me as I got up and went into my backpack. I flipped it open, reached in, and pulled out a bottle of pills. I opened the top and poured them into my hand. I stood, staring at them for a long time, then brought them to my mouth. They were bitter and bigger than I’d expected, but I got them down.
After a while, I started shaking. I was sweating, and my stomach heaved. I thought if I were to lay down, the feeling would pass. A scream woke me up, and I jumped off the bed. My mom was on her knees, crying like I’d never seen before. I went to her and put a hand on her shoulder, but she didn’t look at me. When I turned to the bed, I saw her looking at… me.
After that, things got fuzzy. Mom and Dad argued a lot, and I was sad to see them fighting. I kept thinking they were going to be like Tyler’s parents and would end up getting a divorce. Then one day they packed everything up and left the house. I panicked and ran from room to room, calling for them, promising I’d be good if only they’d come back, but they were gone.
Then new people came and brought their stuff with them. I had to accept my parents left me, and I didn’t know what I’d done to make them so upset, but I knew it must have been really bad….
When I opened my eyes, Tim was standing over me, swiping a hand over my face.
“You ever do that again, and I will beat your ass so hard, you won’t sit down forever.”
I struggled to sit up, but he held me in place.
“What the hell happened?”
My mouth opened, but no sound came out.
Tim hugged me close. “Don’t do that again, baby. I can’t lose you.”
This time when I tried to speak, I croaked the words out. “Aw, you do care.”
Finally he let me sit up. I turned toward the house, but Burton wasn’t there. I could still feel his presence, though, and now he was sadder than before. “He didn’t kill himself.”
“What do you mean? He overdosed.”
“Yes, on what he was told were diet pills. He was trying to lose weight, and a friend stole some from his mom and told Burton the pills would help.”
“Did he tell you this?”
I shook my head, the movement making me dizzy. “I saw it. When he touched me, I saw what he did. It was his last moments of life.” I struggled to stand, and Tim got up, pulling me along with him. “He thinks his parents hate him and left him because he’d been bad.”
He gave me a sad look. I could tell Tim was hurting, too, but his main concern was my well-being.
“Can’t you tell him that’s not what happened?”
“I don’t think so. He knows I can see him, but he doesn’t know me.”
“I amnotasking Rachel to come here.”
What he was saying made perfect sense. How the hell would I explain to her that I could talk to her dead son, and he needed her to forgive him?
“She needs to know it was an accident. She can’t spend the rest of her life thinking that her son killed himself.”
Tim scrubbed a hand over his neck. “This is a really bad idea.” But I think he knew it was the right thing to do. “And what about you?”
Me?“What about me?”
He shook his head. “You’re not thinking clearly. If she comes here, are you ready to admit to someone that you see ghosts?”
Oh. Yeah, okay, I hadn’t thought it through fully. “But you felt his sadness. Could you live with yourself knowing how alone he is, and we did nothing to help?”
He narrowed his eyes. “That’s playing dirty.”
“No, it’s playing to win. Something you taught me when we gamed. I mean, it was you who kept knocking my car off the track, wasn’t it?”
That made him chuckle. “Only because you kept making the same mistake every time. You never go to the outside track.”
“And you’re just now telling me this?”
