Page 56 of The Spirit Key
He sees them all the time now, and it’s wearing on him. He’s turned to drugs, hoping to blot them out, but it won’t work. I’ve done everything I could, short of telling him the truth, and I fear none of it will help. Timbo is distraught, because there is nothing he can do to help Scotty now. I’ve tried to tell him he has to be there when he can, but it’s not in a lock’s nature for a key to suffer alone.
March 8, 2012
Timbo came home and told me that he can’t find Scotty anywhere. It’s as we feared—he’s trying to run from what he can’t hope to comprehend. We should have sat the boys down and told them when they were old enough to understand. The rules of our people were foolish to let this happen. Now it’s too late, and the damage may be irreparable.
April 16, 2014
Today my doctor told me the cancer is spreading and my time is short. I wonder what he’d say if I told him I knew a long time before he did. Timbo has been fussing over me since he found out, and I’m glad to be a surrogate for Scotty, but my son needs his key. On the plus side, he took my advice and threw himself into his programming. I’ve bought him every book, registered him for every course, and he’s come up with an incredible game. He tells me he’s going to market it one day, and he’s going to make a shit-ton of money. I’m not sure what a shit-ton is, but he seems happier than I’ve seen him in a very long time.
July, 2017
My time is nearly over. I can’t get out of bed now without help. Timbo has been attending me constantly. I wish I could tell him the truth, but it’s not for me to do. That has to be something he and Scotty figure out. Today, for the first time in five years, I felt Scotty. His energy is strong, and it calls to me. When I die, I’ll go to him and tell him he has to come back for Timbo’s sake. I hope the love they share will be enough to convince him. Otherwise Timbo will be alone forever.
The journal entries ended there, but I flipped through the pages and found another entry toward the back of the book. The ink was brighter, and I figured that maybe it was more recent. She probably wrote it not long before she died. Tim still sat beside me, his arm around me, as he rubbed my shoulder.
If you’re reading this, it means you’ve found your way back together. No mother has ever been prouder of her boys. Scotty, I’m sorry that you had to deal with so much heartache in your life. I tried my best to be a buffer against it for you, but I could only do so much. Things were supposed to be different. You weren’t meant to come into your gifts until you were much older and could understand your role as Timbo’s key. Now? I assume you’re old enough, so I will do my best to explain it to you both.
For many generations, our families—Beth’s and mine—have been the keepers of the knowledge of life and death. We can sense the departed, and we are honor-sworn to help them in any way we can. When our children are born, their gift makes itself known to us. From Timbo’s eyes we knew immediately that he would be the lock, and that meant when Beth’s child was born, they would be the key.
But Beth’s husband died before the two of them had a child, and we thought our legacy would end, but then Scotty came. Never before have I known a key who wasn’t from the Romani. Even among our own people, we are unique. When I met you, I was floored. But you were to be Timbo’s key, and that made me proud.
I know you’re wondering what a lock and key are, so I’ll try to explain it as best as I can.
As the key, orcheiein our language, Scotty stands between the realms of life and death. They choose whether the door opens or remains closed. The day you died, you were reborn as a key. It’s why spirits come to you for help. As with the living, most spirits are kindly and gentle, but you must always remain vigilant, because there are those who were evil in life and are more so in death. This is why your lock is so important.
Your lock, orklissin—in this case, Timbo—is like a guardian for a key. Spirits are attracted to the lock because they know he’s the gatekeeper for the key. The lock can tell a spirit when the key will see them, or send them away until they decide to grant an audience. At least that’s how it always was. When Scotty died, he started a chain of events that couldn’t be stopped. Timbo was far too young to embrace his role, and as such, he had no way to stop you from seeing the ghosts or, worse, letting them interact with you. Now, because of this, Timbo will have less control over the ghosts, until such time as the two of you learn your respective roles.
This might explain why a ghost was able to slip into Tim’s body. He had no idea what was happening, and the ghost found him receptive. I kept reading, certain we’d learn something that could help us.
Always know this…. Timbo will protect you with his life if necessary. He will care for you, even when you’d rather he didn’t. It’s his duty, and he will fulfill it with honor. In other words, on those days when he’s a pain in the ass, let him be. That’s his way, and you can’t stop it any more than you could jump up to touch the moon. If you knew how many times Beth forced me to sit still so she could ease my aches and pains…. In all truthfulness, she and I were closer with each other than we were with our husbands. No, that’s not fair. We shared a different bond that they would never understand. You and Timbo will share that bond, but if I’m not mistaken, it will be strengthened by your love.
There are others in the world who might help you learn who you are, but not all our people are good. Some encourage the darkness of death, and you must not succumb to their sway. Yes, their powers are great, but tainted as they are, they will corrupt you.
Beth and I fought, sometimes bitterly, about how to proceed. In the end, though, she was right. We couldn’t stop what had already started. But we should have stepped up and trained you ourselves. Hindsight is twenty-twenty, of course, and all the wishes in the world won’t help. I’m sorry for that. I’ll understand if it’s something you can’t forgive, but I hope when you think of me, it will be with kind thoughts.
I am so very proud of the both of you. No mother ever had better sons.
Scotty… I know you may not believe me, but you were incredibly brave. Yes, you tried to stop seeing the spirits, but not one person could blame you for that. They’re scary, and when you’re a child, you have no frame of reference for what they are. Regardless, you’ve come home, drawn back to Timbo, as you should be. I entrust to you my son, whose heart has always been yours. Hold it tight, keep it safe, and love him with all your might.
Timbo? You’ve always filled my heart with pride. Your caring and compassion might be ingrained in you, but the heart that you’ve shown makes you stand out among the Romani. I entrust my other son to you. Guard his heart, be his light in the darkness, and never forget that you are the one true constant in his life.
I wish I had gone against the rules and told you, but it is not the way of my—our—people. Each person’s journey is unique, and though we arm them with basic knowledge, it is something the two of you will have to figure out on your own. Even telling you this is a violation, but you know what they say? Fuck ’em. I’m dead, and they can’t do a damn thing to me.
This won’t be easy for either of you. There will be trials and tribulations to come, but youmusthold fast to each other if you are to survive and still be there for those who will come to you for help. And the assistance they require will vary. Sometimes it will be as simple as listening to their story. Others might need you to finish a task before they can move ahead. And still others might have died and not understand why. These you must be careful of, because there is a possibility that the dead could ask you to intercede in something dangerous.
Okay, I think I’ve written enough. The rest is up to you to learn. But before I close this book and hide it away, I need you to know that no matter what happens, the two of you have always been the best parts of my soul.
Love, Mom
Neither of us spoke for several hours. We read through her words over and over, hoping to glean something that would guide us, but beyond expressing her love, she hadn’t offered much in the way of how we were supposed to deal with things. The one thing I noticed was that Tim kept touching me, and I didn’t mind it at all.
He put his head on my shoulder. “Mom always was cryptic.”
I laughed, not because it was funny, but because it helped release the tension in my body. She knew for years and couldn’t tell either of us?
Tim reached out and squeezed my hand. “She didn’t betray us.”
“No, I understand that. I don’t know anything about the Romani people, but I do understand societal influences.”
