Page 55 of Waiting on Life
Toby grinned at me, his eyes glazed. “Only if you stop.”
Once again, Toby had snatched the power away from me. He wasn’t weirded out or anything. He took to what we were doing like it was completely natural.
“You… aren’t freaked?”
“By how good it felt, yes. By you doing it? No. In fact….”
Before I could react, he grabbed me and threw me down on the bed, hoisted my legs up, and went in for the kill. The man’s tongue could be registered as a lethal weapon. Yes, there was no technique, but mother of pearl, that tongue was wide and covered every available inch. Then, when he drew it in, it poked deep into my hole. I then did what I tried to do to him. I came apart. No one had ever licked me. No one had ever blown me. I was good enough to suck them or get fucked, but kissing, blowing, or rimming? Not likely to happen.
“Toby, I—”
Lost my train of thought completely as he assaulted my ass, laving the skin, pressing deep inside me. Then came the first finger, thick and blunt, not unlike the man. It slid in easier than I would have expected. I realized he must have grabbed the lube and was using that to loosen me. He kept at it as I thrashed on the bed, moaning. Then came the second finger, and finally the third. He slid them in and out in a slow, even cadence, and I lost my ever-loving mind. At this moment there was only one thing I wanted.
“Fuck me!”
There was an almost evil chuckle from Toby. “I’m not sure. You don’t seem to be all that into it.”
The fact that he was playing with me showed me he trusted me to know my mind and my body. He was allowing me to make my choice, not him making it for me.
I grabbed him and wrestled him onto the bed before plucking the lube from beside Toby. He was laughing so hard, he never had a chance. And yes, it was obvious he let me win.
“Fine, if I have to do all the work around here…,” I groused as I slid the rubber over his shaft. Through it all, Toby lay there, his arms folded behind his head, and smirked at me. Warmth bloomed in my chest at the utter trust I had in this man and he in me.
“Thank you, Toby.”
He cocked his head. “For what?”
“Not acting like I’m too broken to make a choice here.”
He reached for my hand. “That wouldn’t be me trusting you. You’ve had enough people in your life trying to live it for you. That won’t be me.” He huffed. “Usually. Okay, I’ll try to not have it be me, but that’s the best I can offer.”
Tammy’s words drifted back to me about how she and Toby were the same.I will move heaven and earth to make her happy.
“Thank you. I’m not weak.”
“Did I say you were?” He squeezed my hand. “I won’t deny that part of me wants to find these guys and beat them to a greasy paste, but you handled it your way. You got them sent to prison, and that’s where animals like that belong. Even if you were scared—”
“I wasn’t. I was pissed the fuck off. They invaded my home. Made me feel unsafe. Made me feel… weak. For months I barricaded myself in my apartment, hiding from the world. If it wasn’t for Pete dragging me back into it, I might never have come out. It was then I realized I needed help. So I went and found Sandy. Every Wednesday and Friday for nearly two years, I sat on her couch and we hashed out my feelings, and she showed me that even though they’d assaulted me, I was the one who had the strength and the power, and nothing they could do would take that away from me.”
I won’t deny how proud I was of myself when Sandy told me that I had a grip on life and that I needed to live it. She said she would always be there if I needed to talk, and I still saw her on occasion when things hit a rough spot, but by and large, I’d dug myself out of that hole, started dating and, eventually, found myself able to have sex again.
“So you know, Kyle. I will never push you to have sex. If you think you’re not ready, or if you—”
I leaned in and kissed him hard. “Shut up,” I groused. “If I wasn’t ready, we wouldn’t be here. I might be a twink, but I’m not, nor will I ever be, a fucking pushover.”
“That’s the Kyle I know and love.” Toby reached up and stroked a finger over my nipple. “Now get on with it.”
He’d never know how much I appreciated him trusting my strength.
I squirted some lube onto my fingers and applied it to his condom-covered cock. Man, holding that thing in my hand made my ass ache for it. It was one of the biggest I’d ever had, and I was grateful for my collection of toys, which helped keep me prepped, especially during the times I wasn’t interested in meeting anyone.
“How do you want to do this?” I asked. “You wanna be on top, or would you prefer I ride you?”
His eyes widened and his breath caught. “Ride… me?” he choked out.
Oh, I was going to teach this man so much.
Chapter Sixteen
