Page 36 of Cultivating Caden
Chapter 10
“So explainto me why you’d move from Portland to Millinocket in order to open a flower shop? There has to be at least fifty thousand people in Portland compared to four thousand in Millinocket.”
“The 2017 population of Portland was just shy of seventy thousand. And as for why…. Well, this is going to sound weird.”
“I’m a lycan who lives in an underground city with dwarves and dryads and fairies and imps, and you think whatever your reason is for moving is going to sound weird?”
Caden shrugged. “Point taken. I graduated from school and was looking at places I thought might make a good area to open my shop in. Nowhere seemed to be the right fit, and I was getting frustrated. I decided to take a week for a mental health break. I got in my car and figured I’d drive, and wherever I ended up would be the place to spend my vacation. As I drove through Millinocket, it was like… it was like something was calling to me. I parked my car at the Katahdin Cabins and went in to see if there was a room available. They put me in this tiny yellow cabin with a television, a bed, and not much else. But I felt… comfortable.”
They turned and got onto the highway that would lead them to Portland. It had been a long time since Quade had been in a car, and he had the urge to roll the window down and stick his head outside. He knew the thought was his wolf’s, but he couldn’t believe it. The damn thing had always been irascible, but now it was like a completely different beast.
“Okay, so then what happened?”
“I took a tour of the town. Seeing as how it’s such a small place, I thought there wouldn’t be a lot to see, but I was wrong. Everywhere I went, I felt like I’d come home. And then I stepped outside one morning and saw the mountain rising up into the clouds, and I knew I’d found the place I wanted to live. When I called and told Matt and Kieran, they were sure I’d lost my mind, but they supported my decision. I returned home, packed up my belongings and came back here. A few days later, I found the perfect shop. It was like everything had come together for me and I’d found the place I was meant to be.”
“I know that feeling.”
“So I bought the shop two years ago and moved into the apartment above it. My business has grown steadily, and I love it here. The small-town atmosphere, the people—everything seems perfect.”
Or seemed perfect until he discovered Sanctuary. Now he was having doubts about his life in Millinocket. Driving away from the mountain—from Ten—nearly broke Caden’s heart. He’d expected to see Ten’s sad face, but instead, he smiled and gave Caden a thumbs-up.
And now here he was, in a rusted-out Ford F-150 with a man who made Caden’s heart beat just a little faster.
“How did you end up in Sanctuary?”
Quade’s lips pressed together in a thin line and his fingers clenched against his palm. Obviously it was the wrong question to ask.
“I’m sorry, you don’t have to—”
“No, it’s okay. Just not something I talk about. The only ones who know are my boss, Jack, and Ten, so you’ll be the first person I’ve willingly told.”
“Okay.” Why this made Caden both excited and nervous he couldn’t be sure, but he was honored that Quade would share with him.
“I was kicked out of my pack by my father when he found out I had slept with a vampire. A human would have been bad enough, but when his son was caught with a, pardon the phrase, ‘fucking bloodsucker,’ that was like the ultimate insult in his eyes.”
“Wait, vampires are real?” Caden shook his head. Of course they were, what a stupid question. “Sorry, go on.”
“I met Alomir one night in a bar. I went in to try to get so drunk I wouldn’t remember my own name. There’d been a hunting party with my clan. It had been the full moon—and yes, lycans are influenced by the phases of the moon—and we were all rowdy and aching for action. We shifted and tore out into the forest, slaughtering every animal we came across. It was exciting and fun and…. Until we came across some guys camping. We were on them before they even knew we were there. I can still hear their screams as we tore them to shreds, tearing out their throats, and….”
Tears streamed down Quade’s cheeks.
“They weren’t doing anything, just camping, and there was no way to know we were out there too. I think they might have been, you know, lovers. The one guy threw himself in front of the other, like that was going to stop us. He was just the first one to die, and then we went after the other guy. My kinsmen had never had human flesh, and they tore into the men. For them it was a rare feast. For me it was horrifying. The next morning, after I realized what we’d done, I snuck out and called the sheriff and told him where to find their bodies, at least what was left of them. The guilt was overwhelming, and I needed to get out of my head, so I went drinking and met Alomir.”
Caden’s stomach churned at the knowledge. He wanted to beg Quade to stop, but he needed to hear the whole thing.
“When I got home the next morning, my First—what you’d call an Alpha—demanded to know where I’d been. He didn’t need to ask, though. He could already smell Alomir on me. I was locked up while they tried to decide what to do with me. I broke the lock and snuck to their meeting so I could listen. They were going to banish me and kill Alomir, and I couldn’t allow that. I called him to let him know he needed to run, and he informed me that the crowned prince doesn’t run. He said he’d meet me in a parking lot not far from where we’d hooked up. I turned to go and found my First standing there, scowling at me. He called for a purge, which meant my people would hunt me and kill me. They almost succeeded, but Alomir got to me before they could. The First knew that in a war with vampires, we’d lose, so he banished me.”
Caden reached out and put a hand on Quade’s arm, then took his hand. “It’s okay.”
Quade pulled away and snarled. “The fuck it is. I helped butcher those men, and I fucking liked it.”
“The hell you did! You were horrified by what you did, I can see that.”
“Yeah, well, a lot of good it did me. There are a lot of things that Hollywood gets wrong about werewolves and lycans. Lycans can change form at any time. Yes, we’re still bound to the moon, but only when it’s full do we lose ourselves. We’re smarter and stronger than werewolves. But we’re also a lot more vicious, even when we’re not shifted. In my clan, we were rough, violent, and had no compunction about killing another lycan. Werewolves are mindless beasts, but lycans retain their intelligence. They know—they just don’t care.”
Quade rested his head against the window, watching the miles as they flew by.
“One thing they got right: a lycan needs his pack. They’re all interconnected and give us a sense of oneness. Without a pack, a lycan will go feral, and any shred of decency they might have will be gone, supposedly forever. That was me. I’d been out on my own too long and went insane. I shifted to a pure wolf, and my mind withered and died, leaving just the animal. Or so I thought.
