Page 67 of The Rabbit's Foot
“Yeah, well stop thinking,” Mal growled. “I am not running a pack. Hell, this isn’t even a pack. It’s a bunch of shifters whose only link is having been tortured by Hyde.”
Alp sat up. “They’re shifters who will understand why one of them is missing a hand, another is missing his eyes, or how about why some kids have wounds so bad, they actually scarred? Who else would understand like we do? Like they all do?”
Mal grabbed Alp’s hand and pulled him back down onto the bed. “I can’t be a First. I’m not cut out for it. Shit, Damon’s people were all healthy, and they were in constant need of handholding. I couldn’t stand that shit, so I left.”
“See, I don’t buy that.” Alp moved closer, touching Mal lightly, his fingers stroking a gentle pattern over Mal’s chest. “I mean, okay, maybe you did leave, but I know for a fact that it wasn’t because you didn’t want to be responsible for others. If that was the case, you should have stayed on your bike and ridden off, leaving me to be dragged back to the lab or to be killed.”
The image of Alp—his fur covered in twigs and leaves and dirt, matted with blood, left to rot in a field somewhere, unclaimed, unloved, unmissed—sent a jolt through Mal.
“You killed four men to protect me. Does that sound like someone who didn’t want to get involved?”
“It’s different,” Mal assured him.
“Okay, tell me how,” Alp said, his gentle ministrations never stopping.
“I didn’t want to get involved,” Mal snapped.
“But you did. No one would have known if you had just kept on going.”
I would have, and I would have regretted it my whole life.“You needed help.”
“So do these people. Do you want me to tell you why I think you left Damon’s pack?”
“Sure, dazzle me,” Mal said, and even he could hear the sarcasm in his voice.
“Because Damon wasn’t going to retire, and you knew it. It’s been years since you left, and he’s still there. I think that’s why you went. You knew, deep down, you could never change anything because Damon wasn’t going to be leaving as First. You wanted more, something you could call your own.”
“That’s bullshit.”
“But it’s not. What was it you said to me? Oh, I remember. ‘No one wanted to keep me. I mean, don’t get me wrong, I wouldn’t have stayed, but it would have been nice to have someone at least ask.’”
“And?”
“I think you would have stayed, but only for someone who truly wanted you. You want to be needed, to make things right for people. You stood up for me against those men, then with Lydia when you were afraid she might tell people about me. Oh, and then for Lydia with Damon. Look at what you do, Mal. You’re our knight. Our champion. Damon knows it, and that’s why he trusts that you can handle this pack.”
The fact that Alp believed in Mal made his chest tighten. When had he last had faith in himself? Was Alp right? Had Mal been needing this to complete him? When Alp pledged to him, something settled in Mal, because he’d known that he was needed.
“I don’t know if I can do this,” he whispered. “I’m not a good bet to lead anyone.”
“You’re the best bet. You have a few years of training under your belt already, and you pick up on things superfast. But that’s not why Damon wants you. It’s because you possess heart and passion and fire. You won’t let anyone walk over your pack, and you will always—and I mean,always—stand between us and anything that would try to hurt us.”
Did Alp really believe that about Mal? That he could be there for everyone in their pack, that they could guide them together? Did he truly trust Mal could do this?
And as the words hit Mal’s brain, he realized he’d thought of this beingtheirpack. Together. The two of them, First and First mate, leading and guiding them all. Being the buffer between them and the world that had already torn them apart.
And now it was time for them to be put back together.
“Do you really think we can do this?” Mal asked, his voice raspy.
“I think we’re the only ones who can,” Alp said, a dreamy expression on his face. Then he laughed. “Guess Mom was right. Our house is going to be bursting with children.”
And for the first time, Mal wasn’t as afraid as he thought he would be. In fact, he knew he should be panicked, but this adventure that lay before them was no longer scary. It thrilled him to know that the two of them would be standing together, making a life, a family.
* * *
The first thing Mal did as leader of the new pack was to take stock of his assets. There was Alp, of course. Lydia said she wasn’t going to be walking away. He had Damon and Cece. The support of the council, which was important, plus the packs who’d already spoken to their groups and asked if anyone was willing to take up the challenge of starting a new pack.
When Damon told him there were people coming, Mal was stunned. He didn’t think anyone would take them up on it.
