Page 50 of Beneath the Scars
Her leaving should make my life a whole lot easier.
Instead, it’s as if my heart is breaking.
It’s time to let her go. I know that. She’ll find a man who’s much better suited to her, and I’ll have to watch from afar as she gets her well-deserved happy ending.
I fucking hate this.
Chapter 27
Addie
“Will you tell me now?” I plead.
Michael’s fitted black shirt and black jeans are drop-dead sexy on him. His shirtsleeves are rolled up, showing off the veins in his forearms. All I want to do is slide over the bench seat in his truck and bite them.
“I’m not telling you,” Michael responds. “And if you ask again, I will spank you hard enough that you won’t sit down for a week.”
The threat sends a shiver down my spine. “That’s not the deterrent you want it to be.”
Michael raises an eyebrow at me before looking back at the road. “Fine, then I’ll edge you until you’re screaming, and I won’t let you come. How about that?”
My nose scrunches at that suggestion.
A bark of laughter comes out of Michael. “That’s what I thought. Now sit back and enjoy the ride.” He reaches across the truck and squeezes my thigh. My fake leather pants are molded to my legs, and the verdict is still out on whether I’m going to regret wearing these black four-inch heels.
Michael’s instruction for our date tonight was to wear something sexy. I have no idea where we’re going or what we’re doing. It took me forever to decide if I was going to go with cute-sexy or bang-me-over-the-table-sexy. Given the way Michael was almost feral when he picked me up, I’m glad I went with the latter.
The only thing I know about tonight is that we’re headed into Greensboro. I’m hoping we’re going to check off one of my fantasies. Why else would Michael tell me to dress this way? Besides, most of the fantasies on my list required items we wouldn’t be able to find in Sonoma. It was one of the reasons why I didn’t want to give Michael my list.
After spending years keeping my desires a secret, it was hard to let him see that part of me. In the end, it went way better than I expected. And now I feel like I don’t have to keep my cards so close to my chest anymore.
Michael won’t judge me for the things I’m interested in trying. On some level, I always knew that about him. But there’s a difference between sharing general fantasies and telling your significant other that you want to be chased through the forest and taken—consensually—against your will.
I’ve always felt like those desires were too much, too taboo, but Michael has shown me that I’m free to be myself with him. The low notes of country music filter through the speakers as Michael drives us into the city.
I remain quiet, knowing he’s not going to tell me anything until we actually get there. And the silence between us is very comfortable.
Twenty minutes later, Michael is pulling into an underground garage. Most of the businesses on this street are dark. At almost nine o’clock at night, it’s not a surprise.
I bite my tongue against asking what we’re doing here asMichael leads me to the elevators. Once there, he pulls out a black card and taps it on the electronic pad next to the number buttons. The elevator then descends two floors, and knots begin to form in my stomach.
What the hell are we doing? And where are we? The elevator doors open to a dim hallway with sconces lining the walls. It’s moody, with red and black designs, and suddenly, I don’t want to go any further.
I freeze with Michael’s hand in mine. “What are we doing, Michael?”
He scans every one of my features, reading me better than anyone else could. Now that we’ve spent a couple of months together, I’m even better at reading him in return. The look in his eyes eases some of the worry building in my stomach.
He palms my cheeks, rubbing his thumbs across my cheekbones. “I wanted to show you the place where I can let go. I don’t have to pretend to be anything other than the broken man I am here. I wanted to share that with you. This is a BDSM club. I pay a monthly membership fee to have full access to all of the amenities.
“It’s been about six months since the last time I was here. I was tired of none of it meaning anything. Then you and I got together, and I didn’t think I would need it anymore. After reading your list of fantasies, I thought that bringing you here would be exactly what we both needed. I just miscalculated a little and should have given you a heads-up.”
My entire body relaxes at his explanation. “A heads-up would’ve been helpful.” I look around the hallway with a new light. “Sooo, this is a sex club.” As the words come out of my mouth, my body begins to heat at the thought. Intrigue and desire mix in a heady cocktail of craving. I want to know what’s in there. I want to know what it looks like. I want to see Michael in this environment. “How does it work?”
“They use wristbands. Each color means something different. It allows the members to know who is up for what with a quick glance. Some people come here to watch. Some people come to participate with only their partner. Some people come because they want to participate in any and everything that is offered, and there are plenty of other combinations. Tonight, you and I are just going to watch.”
“We won’t be doing anything?” I can’t hide the hint of disappointment in my voice.
Michael gives me a sexy smirk. “Oh, we’ll be doing something. No way in fuck would I be able to walk in those doors and keep my hands to myself. But we’re just going to watch everyone else. Not a single person is allowed to touch you but me. I honestly don’t even want them talking to you, but that’s not a likely possibility.”
