Page 46 of King of Rogues
Harry was silent for a time. It was to be expected. He was fiercely protective of his sister. Seeing her in pain over her love for Monsale must surely be giving him cause for concern. Marriage wasn’t just a trivial thing such as a missed dance.
“I will bring Naomi here, but I won’t make her stay. Who knows what the past few days have done to alter the way she feels about you. Promise me that you will not hold it against her if she says the damage is too great.”
Monsale took another long puff of the cigar. “Just make sure you bring her to the beach in the morning. I will take care of the rest.”
He handed Harry the cigar and turned to head back to the castle. His friends would have to forgive his non-appearance at supper tonight.
Andrew McNeal, Duke of Monsale, had grand gestures of love to plan.
Chapter Twenty-One
Regret sat bitter in Naomi’s mouth as she stepped out onto the expanse of the beach the following morning. She normally loved the sea; the cries of the seagulls as they soared high overhead were a siren’s call to her soul.
But not this morning, even the blue skies and refreshing salt air could not bring her a sense of serenity. She would rather be anywhere but here at Monsale Castle. Her protests and offer to remain in London had been refused by her mother. She had made her bed and was now going to have to lie in it.
The thought of standing amongst the guests watching while Monsale made Lady Euphemia his duchess had bile rising in her throat. She was certain there were no more tears left to cry.
How am I going to get through today without falling to pieces?
Her stomach was empty, she couldn’t face food this morning. If she were honest about it, there were few things she could stand right now. Being alone offered the only glint of solace for her broken heart.
Naomi glanced over at her brother; Harry walked alongside her. She hadn’t even been granted the peace of being left alone. Instead, he had been at the door of the cottage a little after seven, rousing her from her bed with the unexpected offer of a long walk on the beach.
She knew what he was doing. Keeping her busy before the wedding ceremony at ten o’clock. Stopping her from leaving.
Why do I have to attend? He is your friend. Can’t people just let me keep one small piece of my self-regard intact?
Wet sand crunched under her boots as they made their way along the beach toward the castle. The towering ancient fortress of Monsale Castle dominated the landscape. She couldn’t escape it. It was a constant reminder of her failure. Of the game she had played and lost.
In a matter of hours Monsale would be walking down the aisle and taking another woman as his bride. By the time the sun had set on this day he would belong to someone else.
Euphemia would be the one to share his bed. To give birth to his children. To see him through the years ahead and be by his side as he grew old. And as a family friend, she would be forced to bear witness to it all. To endure every painful celebration of the Duke and Duchess of Monsale’s lives. Constantly reminded of what she had gambled and lost.
A tear snaked down her cheek. How many tears had she already shed over the past few days?
Why isn’t there a limit on the number of times you can cry over someone?
She stared out to sea, the coast of France a thin dark line in the distance. Travel beckoned. The Steele family had land holdings in Ireland, perhaps when this day was over, she would speak to her parents and suggest she leave England for a time. The fresh air and green vista of another land might help to heal her heart. Allow her time to begin to pick up the pieces, and perhaps find hope once more.
Her gaze drifted to the nearby holm of Saint Margaret which lay a short distance across the water. On the top of a small rise stood the ruins of a medieval monastic church. She had always wanted to visit the tiny island. Had held secret dreams of hosting summer picnics on the grassy knoll next to the chapel.
But that had been when she saw her future as Monsale’s duchess. That dream was now at an end.
“I just wish Mama wasn’t so insistent on me attending the service,” she muttered.
She could well understand her mother’s reasons. Refusing to take part in the celebrations would be hypocritical in the least. It had been her decision not to put her name on the list. Monsale had asked more than once. A man could only take no for an answer so many times before he looked elsewhere for a wife.
“You know why you have to go to the wedding. Mama and Papa consider Monsale to be a part of the family. It would be an insult not to make an appearance,” replied Harry.
As opposed to the groom marrying another woman after he had kissed me and begged me to put my name on his list?
She would take that humiliating experience with her to the grave.
With a resigned sigh, Naomi continued on toward the castle. The rest of the shoreline behind them was ragged rocks and inaccessible drops to the sea. The only other place to walk was inland and into the nearby village of Deal.
A figure appeared at the crest of one of the dunes leading down from the castle. From the way they were dressed it was obviously a man. Naomi peered, straining to see if it was another of her brother’s friends. Whoever it was, they were headed her way.
Damn. The last thing I want to do this morning is make polite conversation.
