Page 51 of A Lady's Heart Deceived
Expectations would no doubt also arise. And at that moment, Piers wasn’t certain he had a firm hold on anything. He had no answers.
This is an imprudent idea.
“I’m sorry, Maggie. It wasn’t fair of me to ask you to go to Denford Park. We can travel directly back to London when you are ready to leave Coventry.”
“I would rather that we travelled to Denford Park. It would be nice to meet your family and see your home. And, if I am being honest, the thought of going back to my own home fills me with trepidation. I will of course have to deal with my parents at some juncture, but I’m not ready for that. Not yet.”
She got to her feet, dusting breadcrumbs from her cloak and gown. Leaning against the sandstone wall, she closed her eyes. A soft sigh escaped her lips.
Maggie Radley was an exquisite woman, possessed with both beauty and a bright mind. Any man who could hold her heart would consider himself most fortunate.
“If you and I are travelling together, then you are still technically on army business, aren’t you, Piers?” she asked.
“I suppose so. My job was to go to Coventry and follow up your case. Until I set foot back in the Horse Guards, I am still in your service.”
“Well then, I think that answers your question. I am perfectly happy to go anywhere, as long as you and I are together, Captain Denford.” She pushed off the wall. Bending, Maggie began to pick up the various dishes from the picnic, packing them back into the basket. A decision had been made, and she clearly didn’t wish to discuss it any further.
Denford Park it is.
Chapter Thirty-One
Maggie noticed the familiar signs of a full-blown anxiety attack long before they reached the entrance to the castle grounds. Her breathing grew labored and shallow, her head felt light. She slowed her steps, desperately fighting against the rising tide of fear.
In the first few days after receiving the letter informing of her Robert’s supposed death, she had been swept up in the maelstrom of grief. She had endured long hours of crying, lamenting the future that had been so cruelly stolen from them.
She had naively thought that when the tears finally did dry it was the end of her physical reaction to the shock of losing her love. But as sadness became her constant companion, she’d fought to find sleep.
A vicious cycle of restless nights and fatigue-filled days had taken her to the brink of a breakdown. And then, when she didn’t think it could get any worse, the attacks began. At times, she would hyperventilate so much that she would come close to actually blacking out.
Piers, the picnic basket, slung leisurely over his arm walked ahead of her on the path. He was oblivious to her growing distress.
She struggled to control her breathing. To calm the rapid intake of air. It didn’t make sense. Why was this happening?
I thought all this was behind me.
Maggie stopped dead in her tracks; her hand was held to her chest. Her heart thumped hard. Forcing herself to take a slow, deep breath, she managed one word: “Piers.”
He whirled round, and his expression flashed with worry. Piers dropped the basket and rushed to her side. “What’s wrong? You look as pale as a ghost.”
How do I explain this? He will think me gone mad.
“I can’t control my breathing. My heart is racing at a gallop.” Maggie slumped against Piers as he put an arm around her, taking her weight.
“Are you going to faint?” he asked.
“I hope not, but please don’t let go.”
“Never.”
It was so frustrating to think that Robert could still have this sort of hold over her. Would she ever be free of him?
“Did you want me to carry you? It’s not far to the coach. I can get the driver to come back for the basket,” said Piers.
Maggie shook her head. “No. I think I am better off trying to walk; it forces me to take deep breaths. I thought I was past all this, but my mind and body are still fighting one another.”
All she wanted to do was curl up in a tight ball and sleep. To go back to hiding away from the world.
“You have been through a lot, and you are not sleeping. I’m not surprised that your nerves are giving out on you.”
