Page 12 of Summer in Kentbury
It doesn’t matter anymore though. At least one of us will be happy. Me? “I have limited emotional capacity,” I remind her. “Love isn’t for me. Just look at my father. He’s a heartless asshole.”
“That may be true, but he loves your mother in ways that most men couldn’t even comprehend,” she points out. “If he could find someone to love, I believe you can too.”
Her words hit me like a punch to the gut. I never wanted to be anything like my father, yet here I am—cold and emotionally distant just like him. But her belief in me gives me a glimmer of hope.
“Thank you for answering my questions,” I say, feeling grateful for the unexpected honesty and closure from our conversation.
“Be happy, Sinclair,” Clara says, her voice carrying a gentle warmth that I can almost feel. The sound of her smile fills my ears and I can’t help but feel a sense of comfort wash over me.
“You too, Clara,” I reply, my heart feeling lighter than it has in days.
After hanging up the phone, I quickly change into my workout gear and head out for a run, needing to clear my head. As I leave the B&B behind, my feet pound against the pavement with determination, each step bringing me closer to Harris Orchard. The sun is shining bright, casting golden rays of light through the crisp, clean air. With each exhale, I can feel the tension slowly dissipating from my body.
Before I know it, I’ve reached the lake, and that’s when I see her. Lavender. She sits atop a fallen log with a sketchbook in her lap, her long brown hair cascading down her back in soft waves. The sunlight catches on her hazelnut strands, giving them a golden glow that makes her look ethereal.
I slow my pace as I approach her, not wanting to startle her. But even with caution, she jumps at the sound of my footsteps and nearly falls off the log in surprise. Instinctively, I reach out and catch her by the arm to steady her.
“Easy there,” I chuckle, unable to resist the smirk tugging at the corners of my mouth. “I didn’t mean to scare you.”
She looks up at me with wide eyes. There’s a hint of mischief in their depths as she replies, “Well, you did. But I suppose I can forgive you . . . just this once.”
Feeling guilty for startling her, I give her a small apologetic grin. “Thanks. I’ll try to make less of a habit of it.”
Lavender brushes off her clothes with a shy yet warm smile. “What brings you out here, Sinclair? Running away from the ghosts of your past, or just the regular morning exercise?”
I can’t help but laugh at her teasing.
“A bit of both, honestly,” I confess, my voice dropping to a more serious tone. Memories of my conversation with Clara running through my head, but being surrounded by fresh air and nature helps to clear the lingering fog. “Had a lot to think about. And running . . . well, it helps sometimes.”
She nods understandingly, her gaze flickering down to her sketchbook for a moment before meeting my eyes again. “Sometimes, moving forward is the only way to figure things out,” she says thoughtfully. “That, and changing the scenery can give you a new perspective. I guess that’s why I’m out here too.” Her words strike a chord within me and I find myself grateful for this unexpected encounter with Lavender in such a peaceful setting.
I take a moment to admire Lavender’s sketchbook, my eyes tracing the delicate lines of her drawing. The lake looks even more beautiful than in reality. Each stroke is purposeful, capturing the serene beauty of our surroundings with an impressive skill.
“You’re very talented,” I remark with genuine admiration, handing back the book to her.
She smiles shyly, a hint of pride shining in hereyes. “Thanks, Sinclair. It’s just a hobby, but it helps me unwind.”
“Do you mind if I join you for a bit?” I ask, surprised by my own desire to prolong our conversation. “I promise not to scare you again.”
Lavender pats the log beside her in invitation and I take a seat, leaving a respectful space between us. “Only if you can share some of your insight on moving forward,” she says with a small smile. “I could use some of that myself.”
As I settle down next to her on the log, I can’t help but feel a sense of closeness between us.
“Well,” I begin as my gaze drifts out over the lake, “I just had a long talk with my ex-wife. This whole trying to learn from my mistakes is harder than I anticipated. More so when I don’t like to admit that I’ve failed.” I turn to look at her and see understanding and empathy in her expression.
“It sounds tough,” she responds softly.
“It is . . . was. But it’s also freeing in a way. Acknowledging the problem is the first step to fixing it, right?”
“I totally understand.” She nods in agreement and I can’t help but feel grateful for this unexpected connection with someone who gets me.
“And what about you?” I inquire, curious about her own journey. “What brought you to the lake so early in the morning?”
Lavender sighs and gazes out over the water. “I couldn’t sleep since I still don’t know what I want from this visit. Sure, there’s a need for change. I came here looking for peace, maybe to find a part of myselfthat I lost along the way. But I don’t know what I want for my future, other than my business to stay afloat.”
I nod, understanding all too well. “I heard that Kentbury has a way of giving us what we need, not always what we expect. At least that’s what my brother says.”
Her laughter rings out again, a joyful sound that seems to dance with the gentle breeze. “Maybe that’s exactly what we both needed,” she says thoughtfully. “A surprise or two to shake things up.”
