Page 12 of Before We Break Again
He’s crazy if he thinks I’m just going to drop everything and follow his lead.But there’s something in his eyes—an intensity that tells me he’s not leaving without getting his way.He’s the kind of person who bends the world to his will, and I can see it written all over his face: he’s not asking.He’s telling.
And for the first time in years, I have no idea what I’m supposed to do.
ChapterSix
Halsey
The answer should be no.
But I hesitate.The word sits on the tip of my tongue, refusing to come out.
It’s like the decision itself has grown larger than it should, pulling me in two opposite directions—one where I walk away, stay safe, keep my life orderly and professional.And the other ...the other is full of shadows, a path that leads me right back to a world I’ve tried so hard to forget.Not because I wanted to, but because I had no choice.Because everyone made me leave it behind.
Thinking about it hurts too much—like reopening a wound that’s never really healed, just covered over with time.I buried it, buried them, because it was easier than facing the ache of all that was lost.Easier than admitting that they were a part of me I could never truly escape.Now, standing here, it’s like a knot tightens in my chest.The air feels thinner, harder to breathe, like my lungs can’t quite expand enough to take it all in.
I had to live without them.It was almost impossible, but I learned.
I’m okay now, but deep down, there’s a part of me that never stopped aching for what we were—for the pieces of myself I left behind.Now, with Dusty standing in front of me, it’s like the air has been sucked out of the room, leaving me gasping for breath, struggling to find a way to hold on.
His eyes stay locked on mine, dark and unyielding, his posture rigid.He’s waiting for my answer.I know him too well, know every line of his face, the way his jaw tightens, the way his muscles are drawn taut like he’s ready to fight if I say no.He won’t back down.
I open my mouth, but nothing comes out.
Dustin doesn’t speak either, but the silence between us feels charged.It’s thick with everything we’re avoiding, all the years between us pressing in, heavy and suffocating.
“Come on, Halsey,” he finally says, his voice low, almost too calm.“We both know you’re not gonna walk away from this.”
And he’s right, damn him.He knows me too well.
I glance at the office door, the sterile walls of the clinic pressing in on me, pulling me back toward the safety of routine and control.I could kick him out, pretend this conversation never happened, stay wrapped in the predictable bubble I’ve built for myself—where everything makes sense.Where I don’t have to feel.
But the memory of Santos lying on the ice creeps in, breaking through the walls I’ve carefully constructed.It’s there, looming, no matter how hard I try to push it away.
I look back at Dustin, and for a moment, the years fall away.It’s like I’m back in Blissful Meadows, standing by the lake with the two of them, my heart caught between the pull of their gravity.It’s terrifying how easy it is to fall back into this—into them.
“I can’t ...”I start, but the words falter, hanging in the air between us.
What is it that I can’t?
I can’t walk away from them.
But I can’t throw myself into the past either.
And I can’t risk breaking all over again.
I don’t think I’m strong enough to put myself back together.Not this time.Dusty’s eyes soften for the briefest moment, and he takes a step closer.“I’m asking you to help him.That’s all.”His voice drops lower, almost a whisper.“Help him, Halsey.”
I close my eyes for a second, inhaling deeply, but all I can picture is Santos—his leg, the injury that could end everything for him.His dreams have always been tied to the ice, and now it’s slipping away from him.
It’s enough.
It’s too much.
And it’s pulling me under too.
“Fine, I’ll give you five minutes to make your case,” I whisper, the words barely escaping my lips.
The relief in Dusty’s eyes is immediate, though he doesn’t smile.He just nods, as if he knew all along I’d say yes.Maybe he did.Maybe I did too.
