Page 46 of Before We Break Again
My hand slides up, cradling her face, pulling her closer as the kiss deepens.Years of distance melt away, and all the uncertainty, all the fear, vanishes in the heat of this moment.
It’s like coming home, like finding something I didn’t even realize I’d lost.Her fingers grip the fabric of my shirt, pulling me closer, and for a second, the whole world feels like it’s right here—between us, in this kiss.
It’s overwhelming, dizzying, but at the same time, it feels like the most natural thing in the world.As natural as breathing, as loving her.My heart pounds in my chest, like it’s trying to catch up to the moment, to everything I’ve been holding back.
I missed this.
I missed her.
I missed us.
And right now, it feels like nothing else matters—like, in this kiss, we’ve found something real.Something worth fighting for.Something that’s been there all along, waiting for us to find our way back.
When we finally pull apart, we’re both breathless, our foreheads resting together.I can still feel the ghost of her lips on mine, like a promise.Her eyes flutter open, and I see something in them that mirrors what I’m feeling—relief, hope, and perhaps a future we could share.
“I missed you,” I whisper, my voice raw with emotion, barely able to contain everything swirling inside me.
She smiles, her lips still close enough that I can feel the warmth of her breath.“I missed you too.More than you know.”Then, she glances around.“He’s still not here.”
“He’s probably battling a demon or two before he comes back and realizes that he belongs with us,” I say.
That’s always been the thing with Dusty—he’s never really understood that he didn’t have to force his way into our world.He doesn’t get that we’ve been waiting for him, even before any of us knew it.It was always supposed to be the three of us.We just hadn’t figured it out until he came into our lives.
Halsey’s quiet for a moment, her eyes searching mine, and then she asks, almost hesitantly, “Can we make this work?”And it’s strange, the roles reversed—me being the one who has to offer reassurance, to promise something that feels so uncertain.
But I don’t hesitate.I lean in, pressing my forehead against hers, grounding us both in the moment.“Of course we can,” I tell her, the conviction in my voice stronger than I expected.“It’s going to be hard.We’ll have to fight for it, every day, but us ...we’re going to happen.It’s going to be forever.”
I just know, I can feel it in my gut that we’re not going to let each other go this time.Not again.
She closes her eyes for a moment, as if letting herself believe it too.And when she opens them again, there’s a flicker of hope, small but real.We both know it’s not going to be easy.We’re stepping into something bigger than either of us, something that could break us if we let it.
ChapterTwenty-Four
Dustin
“Why did you leave?”Halsey asks quietly, her voice cutting through the steady hum of the car as the driver navigates us through the dimly lit streets, heading toward the Merkel Hotel downtown.There’s an edge to her tone, soft but filled with curiosity and maybe a tad of anger in between.
“I had a few things to do,” I reply, keeping my tone light, even though I know she won’t buy it that easily.She never does.
I glance out the window, watching the streetlights blur past, but the real answer is stuck between my throat and the lump choking me, preventing me from swallowing and breathing since I saw them together.
But really, what’s there to say?That I needed time to get my shit together?That there’s been this tug-of-war between my heart and my very broken brain, and I don’t know which side is winning?Leaving could be easier, I think to myself, it’s logical, but walking away doesn’t make sense to my heart.
That stupid, stubborn organ that keeps insisting I belong with them.That I’m not whole unless I’m close to them.Being away from either of them makes me feel ...incomplete.Like a part of me wilts when I’m not near them.There’s a part of my soul that shrinks at the thought of never seeing them again, never loving them again.
“You were gone for more than five hours,” she presses.
I sigh and turn to face her fully.I see it, skepticism written all over her expression.“Gavin and I had a ton of stuff to handle,” I explain, though my voice softens, knowing it’s not the full truth.“Especially with you and San moving onto the ranch.There were things I couldn’t leave for later.”I pause for a beat, watching her eyes search mine.“I wanted to make sure everything was ready for when you both get there.The doctor said he’ll be home in a few days.I want the ranch to be perfect by tomorrow, just in case.”
She narrows her gaze.Halsey is trying to figure out if I’m lying.
It’s not a lie, but it’s not the whole story either.The truth is, I felt like I was intruding on something between her and San, like they needed time without me hovering around.And if I’m being honest, a part of me wanted to disappear—to melt into the background like I always do, to retreat before things got too complicated.Isn’t that what I’ve done best since I was a kid?Make myself invisible?Disappear before anyone realizes how little value I bring?How much of a burden I am?
That feeling, that fear—it’s always been there, lurking in the back of my mind, whispering that I’m just in the way.It’s easier to fade out, to remove myself from the equation before anyone has the chance to confirm what I’ve been afraid of my whole life.
But that’s the problem, isn’t it?Disappearing doesn’t fix anything.It just leaves me feeling more lost, more disconnected, and ...hollow.
Halsey’s gaze softens a little, like she can see through my half-answers, into the parts I’m not saying.She’s always been able to do that—read me in ways no one else can.
