Page 6 of Before We Break Again
“So now you’re going to cash in a favor?”
I shake my head, the smile fading as the truth settles in.There’s nothing to cash in.Nothing.Everything I did—it was because I wanted her to be happy.
Even if it meant she’d be happy without me.Without us.
Even if all I could do was watch her from a distance, as she chased what she once thought was impossible.
“Nope,” I say softly, more to myself than to Gavin.“I’m just hoping she’s got enough glue left to put us back together.That’s why I need to know if the asshole’s out of the picture.”
Gavin shrugs, his tone more resigned than skeptical now.“You’ll have to ask her yourself.I’m not hiring another PI to keep tabs on Dr.Lahey.In the meantime, I’ll spin the story with that picture and get your jet ready.”
“That’s all I need,” I say, pushing myself off the couch, already heading to my room.My heart’s racing, a mix of anticipation and fear swirling inside me.I’m not leaving until she agrees to treat Santos.And maybe fix what’s left of us.
ChapterThree
Halsey
The courtyard is always quiet,a small slice of peace tucked away from the busy clinic.Out here, the world feels like it pauses—the city’s noise softened by the tall hedges, the hum of traffic replaced by the gentle rustling of leaves.It’s one of the few places where I can breathe, where, for just a moment, nothing else matters.
I love the rush—the patients, the urgency, the sense of responsibility—but sometimes, I need to recharge.The green that surrounds me, the way the trees sway, the solid earth beneath my feet—it’s grounding.
I sink onto a bench, stretching my legs, tilting my face toward the sunlight.I close my eyes and let myself drift, pretending, just for a moment, that I’m back in Blissful Meadows.
The memory comes before I can stop it—those afternoons on the dock, skin warm from the sun, time slipping by as we talked about everything and nothing.Santos, with his deep thoughts and even deeper eyes, always talking about making it big in the league while Dustin cracked jokes or dragged me into the water, his laughter echoing in the air.
I can almost hear them again—Santos, serious but hopeful, his eyes lighting up as he talked about his future.And Dustin, sitting beside him, strumming his guitar, humming softly, lost in the melody as if he were searching for the lyrics deep within his soul.The way he’d close his eyes, completely absorbed, trying to put his feelings into music—our feelings—like he could capture everything we were in those moments through his strings.
The memories fill the silence around me, stirring something deep inside.We were happy once.Not perfect, but we had each other.
A flicker of movement catches my eye, and for a split second, I see her—young, naïve, still full of dreams.Me.A fifteen-year-old girl falling in love with her two best friends.She’s leaning out over the lake, laughing as Santos splashes her with cold water.
Just as fast, the reflection fades, replaced by the present—who I am now.Professional.Detached.The doctor who keeps everything under control, because it’s easier to manage other people’s pain than face my own.
But some days, like today, I can’t help it.I let myself wonder what would’ve happened if I hadn’t left—if I hadn’t been dragged away from Blissful Meadows and the two people who knew me better than anyone ever has since.
I open my eyes, staring up at the branches swaying gently above me.The problem with this courtyard is that it’s too quiet.It gives me too much space to think—about the things I’ve buried for so long.I’ve spent years trying not to think about Blissful Meadows.Trying not to think about them.
My phone buzzes in my pocket, pulling me back to the present.It’s a reminder about my next appointment.The last patient of the day.A new consultation.
With a sigh, I push myself up from the bench, smoothing down my top and jeans as I head back toward the clinic.As I reach for the door, that familiar heaviness creeps in—the memories I can’t quite shake.The courtyard is supposed to be a retreat, but today it feels like a place I can’t escape, pulling me back to a past I’m not ready to face.Maybe that’s why I never stay out here for long.
I make my way to my office on the top floor of the clinic.
“Your four-thirty is here,” Roni says as I pass her.
I raise an eyebrow, catching the excitement in her voice.She’s practically giddy, which makes me wonder if we’ve got some famous football player here for a consultation.She’s obsessed with them.But I doubt that’s the case.If any high-profile patient were coming in, Lindberg or Dr.Devoss would be handling it.
Not me.
I’m always the last choice.The youngest and least experienced doctor here—or so they remind me.It doesn’t matter that I’ve been to places they only dream about—helping athletes from all over the world through my fellowships and internships.No, I’m always the one they sideline.
If it were up to me, I’d open my own practice.Run things my way, without needing approval for every decision.No second-guessing myself because of their condescension.My patients would get the care they deserve without someone else calling the shots.
But for now, I’m here, waiting for them to take me seriously.
Roni takes me seriously enough—well, outside of the practice, at least.At work, we try not to mix business with friendship, and that’s fine.I have other people to vent to about the frustrations of work.Roni is the one who listens when I vent about my personal life—my bad breakups, my unlucky love life, and ...well, that’s about it.
She doesn’t know how my heart shattered when I was sixteen, how I’ve never been the same since.
