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Winnifred: What’s your stance on pumpkin carving as emotional catharsis?

Soren: I’m pro-carving, anti-crying-on-gourds.Are we carving pumpkins?

Winnifred: I am.You obviously are on the other side of the Atlantic, missing me and trying to figure out how to spend Halloween with me from a distance.

Soren: Is that our official couple’s statement?

Winnifred: Yes, try to keep up with my email updates.

Soren: It’d help if you sent them, Win.

Soren: I keep getting tagged in “cutest couple” Halloween countdowns by my sister.

Winnifred: You’re welcome.

Soren: What does this mean?

Winnifred: We’ll be part of the family contest.We’ll win even when we’re not there.

Winnifred: I’m thinking that if we’re faking this relationship, we should at least have a fake Halloween meet-cute story.

Soren: You can only have one meet-cute, Win.We already used it.It’s over.

Winnifred: It can’t be over.

Soren: It was the moment you made up the Lucy story, or was it a lemon?

Winnifred: I ...I don’t remember.That kiss gave me amnesia.Maybe we can come up with a new one because everyone might have forgotten.

Soren: That’s not how this works.

Winnifred: Then how does it work?

Soren: You moved next door, end of the story.

Winnifred: You fell in love slowly throughout the years?

Soren: Probably, but I never realized it until it was too late, and I had given you everything—including my heart.

Winnifred: I’m dabbing my tears.You’re a true romantic, Soren.

Soren: Somehow, I think you’re making fun of me.

Winnifred: No, but no one will buy that story.

Soren: Fine, make up a new one, but if we get caught, I’ll fake amnesia and move to Timbuktu.

Winnifred: So, how do we keep pretending without accidentally feeling more?

Soren: We don’t.We just hope our ficus survives the fallout.

ChapterTwenty-Six

Winnifred: I just finished sorting and packing 200 individually wrapped pumpkin cookies.

Soren: I assume you’re emotionally stable now.

Winnifred: Define stable.