Page 5 of Olivia
Olivia
Rose nudges my shoulder. “The flowers are beautiful, aren’t they”
“They’re gorgeous,” I say, trying to hide the disappointment I’m feeling.
Colt is nowhere to be seen. I’d told all my sisters about him. Told them how I’d met this huge, gorgeous man who seemed really interested in me. I’d even told them how I thought he might be the one. They were all dying to meet him. But now, he’s not here. He’s ghosted me.
They’re all being really tactful. Carefully avoiding the elephant in the room. It’s Jade’s wedding and I don’t want to let my love life ruin her special day. But my heart feels like it’s been smashed into a thousand pieces and there are tears constantly in my eyes.
The organ starts playing and I turn around to see Jade and walking up the aisle. Axel, her soon to be husband, is standing at the front with a huge grin on his face. I’m so happy for my sister. So happy that she’s found the man of her dreams. But this disaster with Colt has tainted that happiness for me, and I hate him all the more for it.
The ceremony is beautiful. For a second I even manage to forget the train wreck that is my own love life.
But then we’re at the reception and it seems like almost everyone is in love. There’s something about weddings. The already married cuddle and kiss and they remember their special day. The just-got-together grind on the dance floor. Pheromones filling their mind with thoughts of passion and desire.
For me, it’s just another reminder that I’ll probably spend the rest of my life alone. A spinster.
I’ll take up crochet. Maybe get myself a membership to one of those fancy wine clubs that send you a new and exotic bottle each week. Although, the way things are going, I’ll probably have to have a few more than one bottle a week.
Everything else in my life seems to be coming together. The bakery I started with my sisters is bringing in a ton of money. But there’s no point having money if I can’t share my happiness with that special someone. And, as my sisters all fall in love around me, the missing, man-shaped hole in my life only seems to get bigger and bigger. A constant reminder that there’s something wrong with me. Something that men don’t find attractive.
Maybe it’s my plus-sized physique. Maybe it’s just me. My personality.
I clap and I cry as I watch Jade and Axel cut their cake. They hug each other tight and kiss. The DJ kicks in with a cheesy classic and suddenly the dance floor is full of happy, drunk people having the time of their lives. It’s too much to bear.
“I’m just going to freshen up,” I say to Rose, my only single sister who has spent pretty much the whole day by my side, scoffing all the delicious food and pointedly avoiding the topic of our own love lives.
“You want me to come with?” she asks, already getting up from her seat.
“No,” I down the rest of my glass of wine and finish off the slice of cake I was eating. “You stay here. I’ll be back in a minute.”
Pushing my way through the crowd, I do my best not to burst into tears. I can feel people’s eyes on me. Like they’re looking at me and thinking how pathetic I am. Wondering what’s wrong with me and why I haven’t managed to find a man and settle down yet.
Is it not good enough that I’m an expert baker with a successful business? Can’t I be a confident, independent woman, who doesn’t need a man to complete me?
In the restroom, I apply a little make up and sort out my hair. There are two girls next to me at the mirror gossiping about a boy one of them likes. Apparently he’s drop dead gorgeous and they pontificate on the possible size of his manhood.
I can’t help thinking about Colt. If he was here right now, I’d have his body pressed up against me. I’d know what it felt like to have his lips pressed against my mouth. To feel his muscles beneath my fingers.
I check my phone for the millionth time, but I still don’t have any signal. I curse my sister for picking a venue that’s all the way up in the mountains. Maybe he’s been trying to call me. Maybe something bad has happened. A car crash. A heart attack. A shooting. Maybe he’s lying in a hospital bed fighting for his life and I’m here cursing his name and feeling sorry for myself.
But deep down I know that the most likely explanation is that he decided he made a mistake. That he was only interested in me for a quick and easy lay, and that going to a wedding with me was too much hassle. He’s probably already found someone else. Someone younger. Someone thinner. Someone infinitely more beautiful.
I step back into the hall and look at my sister Hazel slow-dancing with her husband. They look so happy. So in love. But as much as I love them both, it's just another reminder of what I'm missing out on.
In need of fresh air, I head straight for the exit. I push open the door with a little bit too much force and all but crash into a man coming through the door.
I look up, ready to apologise, but when I see the man before me the words turn to bile in my throat.
“There you are,” he grins.
“Colt?” I say, pushing past him. Needing fresh air and open space more than ever.
He follows me out into the parking lot. He catches me by the arm and spins me around. I shove him in the chest, but he’s so big and strong he doesn’t even move.
“What the heck?” I cry. He’s wearing his police uniform, and as my hand lingers on his chest the resilience in me weakens. Tears flood down my cheek. I want to hate him. I want to shout at him and curse and tell him to go to hell. But at the same time, I just want to collapse into his arms and feel his heart beat against my ear. “You stood me up.”
“Honey,” he says, squeezing my hands against his lips. “I can explain.”
