Page 61 of No Fear
“No. Don’t.” Rachel grabbed his biceps keeping him from retreating further, “I didn’t mean stop, stop. I just meant…” Her cheeks flushed and she smiled softly, “We’re going to be late to the wedding if we… we have to stop.”
“Oh…” He let her draw him close again as relief made him sag against her, “Yeah, the wedding. I forgot about that for a second there.”
Rachel giggled lightly, “You forgot your brother is getting married tonight?”
“I forget the rest of the world exists when I look at you, Rach.” He brushed her hair back softly and kissed her temple.
“Remy…” Her voice was barely a whisper, “About what you said…”
He sighed when she trailed off nervously, “I love you. I love you so much it scares the hell out of me and I swore I was going to wait, give you time to get comfortable because I know it’s fast but… I can’t watch my brother pledge his life and love to Jemma tonight and not admit that’s exactly what I want with you. I want us to have everything together, Rach. I love you.”
“I…”
“No.” He cut her off with a press of his lips against hers, “Don’t say it now. Don’t say it back to me just because I said it. You say it when you’re ready and not a moment before and I’ll be here, waiting… no matter how long that takes.”
“But…”
“I love you Rachel.” He kissed her again quickly, relief spreading through his tense muscles as the admission settled the worst of the nerves he’d been feeling for weeks. He’d kept it tied up inside of him, thought he needed to keep those precious words to himself, but he didn’t. He’d told her and he already felt more at ease about them. She would say it because she felt the same way. He knew she did. But it wouldn’t be right now and it wouldn’t be because he’d said it first. “I’m gonna hop in the shower and then we can go. I won’t be long.”
He pulled away from her, unable to look down at her beautiful upturned face or the wonder in her eyes and not kiss her again. He turned and headed for the shower without bothering to grab clothes for when he got out. He couldn’t stay in the bedroom with her a moment longer and not touch her, not kiss her and tempt her to say the words he wanted to hear so he could lay her down in their bed and claim her once and for all. So he walked away to take a cold shower and knew he’d likely need another by the time this night was over.
Because watching his little brother pledge himself to Jemma was going to be emotional for them all. Adding Jemma to the family, officially, was a long time coming and way past overdue. It should have happened ages ago but it had taken a second chance for Cash to get his forever with the woman he loved and Remy knew that watching them become husband and wife would be one of the most beautiful things he’d ever seen.
But having Rachel at his side tonight made it all perfect. Holding her hand. Touching her. Dancing with her. Sharing his family with her and her with them, it was everything that he’d always been missing in his life. A place to call home.
“Remy?”
He paused in the doorway and turned back, worried that Rachel was going to say something that would be impossible to ignore, “Yeah?”
Her eyes were bright and if he wasn’t mistaken, a little bit damp. He wanted to rush to her and ask her what was wrong but from the smile painting her full lips he knew that wasn’t what had brought on the tears. Nothing was wrong. Not with them being together. And maybe that was just as miraculous for her as it was for him.
“Just… hurry.” She finally smirked, “I don’t want to miss a second of this night.”
He returned her smile with a wink and then hurried to the bathroom and shut the door. He had a feeling tonight was going to be one of the best nights of his life. Not just because Cash was marrying Jemma, finally, and Colt and Skylar would be at their sides to share it with them. But because he was a part of it and he’d never thought he would get that chance until he came back to Old Settlers.
He’d finally come home and for the first time since that day he stormed back into town on a mission, it finally felt like home too.
“Jesus…”
Remy watched from across the room as Rachel tilted her head back and laughed at something the other girls said. That pain in his chest had been growing all night and was now a solid, heavy weight he knew he would carry for the rest of his life. It wasn’t a burden. It was gift. And it was all because of the beautiful girl with the dark hair and stormy eyes that chose that moment to glance his way and smile.
Sitting through the wedding with Rachel at his side had been just as overwhelming as he’d expected it to be.
He’d watched as Cash stood at the altar, clearly nervous but smiling and he’d known even before the crowd began to stand and turn that Jemma had entered the room by the sheer joy that overtook his little brothers face. The small crowd had been mostly family and friends and they’d laughed when Cash stormed up the aisle instead of waiting for Jemma to come to him. He’d swept his girl off her feet and carried her back to the altar, only depositing her back on the ground after a long, deep kiss.
Rachel had taken his hand in hers, linking their fingers and squeezed. She’d smiled up at him when he looked down at her and he hadn’t been able to stop himself from kissing her. Her cheeks had been flushed when he pulled back and though he’d wanted nothing more than to pull her into his lap, he’d let her take her seat as the wedding got underway.
When Cash promised to love, honor and cherish Jemma until he took his last breath, to always put her and their children first, to be honest and faithful, to be eternally hers, he’d felt Rachel squeeze his hand again and he’d squeezed back. When Jemma promised to love, honor and cherish Cash until she took her last breath, to always put him and their children first, to be honest and faithful, and be eternally his, Rachel had sniffled and he’d caught her wiping at her cheeks.
It was then, right then, in that moment, that he’d known somebody soon he would convince this girl to exchange vows like that with him. He wanted her tied to him in every way. He wanted to see her in one of those big, fancy white dresses, her hair twisted up and her makeup mussed by tears and his kiss. He wanted to see her belly swollen with his child, something he’d never thought he would want, something he had no idea if she would want, but that he knew they would talk about and decide together.
Because even though she hadn’t said the words yet, the way she’d looked at him when the happy couple was pronounced husband and wife, had told him that she wanted all those things with him too.
“They look good together, huh?”
He glanced up to see Colt smirk at him as he slid the empty chair at Remy’s side around and sank into it backwards. Movement on his other side caught his attention and he snorted as Cash winked and did the exact same thing. Sometimes, the twins were kind of creepy with the way they even moved alike. He smiled at them but his eyes automatically drifted back to the group of women dancing together to some ridiculous song from the eighties about balloons or something.
He realized it was the first time all night he’d seen Jemma or Skylar without their significant other attached to their side so he wasn’t surprised his brothers were crowding him now. They never left the girls for long but from here they could watch just as he was watching Rachel. And the three of them together really were a sight to behold.
