Page 29 of Stay A Little Longer
Trent struggled to push the words out, “They didn’t just accept it. There was a lot of yelling. Mostly from my dad about how he wasn’t going to have a fag for a son. That queers were wrong and he hadn’t raised me wrong. He ordered, demanded, that I take it back.”
“Take it back?” Lance stared at him with those dark eyes, that spark of anger flaring again, “He pulled a gun on you because you wouldn’t take back the admission you were gay?”
“Yes.”
Lance’s jaw twitched and he dropped his knife onto his plate, “Jesus Trent… that’s… I lost my appetite. That’s... terrible. I’m so sorry that happened to you.”
“It’s okay.”
“No. No it’s not. It’s not even remotely okay.” Lance met his eyes again and there was so much hurt there that Trent automatically reached for his hand and their fingers intertwined in a way that made his breath catch, “It’s not okay and I want… Jesus I want to kill that bastard for threatening you, for hurting you.”
Trent’s heart squeezed, “Baby, you can’t. He’s already dead.”
Lance blinked, “What?”
“He died a few years ago. Heart attack. Mom said it was all that hate in his heart. My fault of course.”
“Fuck.” Lance shook his head, “You don’t… they don’t… even with him gone they don’t accept you?”
“No. It’s one of the reasons I never came out to anyone else. At least that’s what I tell myself. It wasn’t just for my career. It was to protect my family too.”
“Why? When they were so awful to you?”
“Because they’re still my family.” Trent winced at the only reasoning he had, “And I hate disappointing them. Hate that I didn’t turn out how they wanted. Hate that people might assume Trevor is gay too just because we’re twins and I can’t out him.”
Lance’s eyes widened, “Your twin brother is gay too?”
“Yes. Closeted but yes.”
It had taken Trevor a long time to come clean, even to Trent. He would never come out publicly. Ever. Trent knew that and he didn’t judge him, couldn’t. Not when he’d spent so long in the closet himself. Not when Trevor had been witness to Trent’s coming out party and the fallout.
“And you never outted him? To take the spotlight off you? So you weren’t so… alone?” Lance was looking at him with wonder and confusion now and Trent shook his head.
“Of course not.”
Lance chewed his bottom lip again and dropped his gaze to his plate. Their meals sat mostly untouched. Maybe it had been a bad idea to start the heavy talk so early in the evening. He’d ruined both their appetites. Clearly. And definitely the mood.
“Thank you.”
Trent frowned at the whispered words, “What?”
“Thank you.” Lance looked back up at him, “For not saying anything about me, to anyone.”
“Never. I’d never say a word. Not as long as you don’t want me to.”
Lance winced and looked away, “So yeah, never then.”
Trent’s heart squeezed again but this time, with pain. Some part of him wanted to hear that Lance had at least considered coming out at some point. Not for him but for himself. But he swallowed the urge to ask why that was when things were already so deep.
Instead he tilted Lance’s chin towards him until the other man was forced to meet his gaze, “I’m not going to out you, okay?”
Lance’s Adam’s apple bobbed, “Okay.”
Trent rubbed his thumb over Lance’s stubble, “Lance?”
“Yeah?”
“I like you.”
